Lez Chat

Writer & DIrector

Tig Notaro

Writer & DIrector

kyledunnigan

Actor

Kate Moennig

Actor

Sandra Bernhard

Actor

Lucy Lawless

Actor

Nick Kroll

Actor

Stef Willen

Actor

Clea DuVall

Actor

Jen Kirkman

Actor

Nicole Randall Johnson

Actor

Nicol Paone

Makeup

Kat Bardot

Executive Producer

Funny Or Die

Lighting

Brian Lane

Additional Credits >

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The video opens with Stef Willen in a sexy outfit, reclining on a couch.

Stef Willen: Are you lonely? Do you fantasize about eavesdropping on private conversations between real lesbians? Well now you can, by calling Lez Chat.

A phone number appears on the screen that reads: 555-LEZ-CHAT. The shot cuts to Clea Duvall standing outside near a motorcycle wearing helmet. Clea Duvall is talking on a phone.

Clea Duvall: The weird thing is we've been living together for eight months and our periods haven't even synced up yet.

The shot cuts to Sandra Bernhard on the phone.

Sandra Bernhard: You mean you haven't willed your period away yet?

An inset box with Stef Willen in it rolls across the screen.

Stef Willen: Oooo, Lez Chat.

The shot cuts back to Stef Willen on the couch.

Stef Willen: Ever dreamed of a lesbian threeway. Wait no more.

The shot cuts to Nick Kroll on the phone. The shot cuts to Lucy Lawless on a construction site answer her phone.

Lucy Lawless: Hey.

The shot move into a four-way split screen with Nick Kroll, Lucy Lawless, Nicole Paone and Kristina Goolsby.

Nicole Paone: Hey

Lucy Lawless: Hey, Karen there?

Kristina Goolsby: Yeah, I'm here.

Lucy Lawless: Hey.

Kristina Goolsby: Hey

Nicole Paone: Hey

Nick Kroll (looking disgruntled): I want my money back.

The shot cuts back to just Nick Kroll. He continues to look annoyed.

The shot cuts to Stef Willen on the couch.

Stef Willen: Oooo.

The shot cuts to Nicole Johnson standing in a kitchen.

Nicole Johnson: Don't tell Jo, but I accidentally let her cat out on the way back from softball practice.

The shot cuts to an exterior of a house. An inset box containing Stef Willen crosses the bottom of the screen.

Stef Willen: Mmmm, real cats getting out of real houses.

A still image of a cat appears on screen and small meow is heard.

Stef Willen (voiceover): Lez Cat.

The shot cuts back to Stef Willen on the couch.

Stef Willen: Oooo.

The shot cuts to Kate Moennig standing in a gym talking on the phone.

Kate Moennig: Yeah, I irritated this old field hockey injury when I slid into second base last week.

The shot cuts to Nicole Randall Johnson standing in a bedroom talking on the phone.

Nicole Randall Johnson: Oh, that sucks.

The shot cuts back to Stef Willen on the couch. The following text appears on the screen: Call Now! 555-LEZ-CHAT

Stef Willen: Don't be shy, silly face. Get in on real lesbian action.

The shot cuts to split screen with Kyle Dunnigan on one side and Kate Moennig on the other.

Kyle Dunnigan: when you slid into second base, were your khakis rubbing together?

Kate Moennig: I wasn't wearing khakis.

Kyle Dunnigan: What is second base for you guys? Is that boobs? Ours is boobs.

The shot cuts back to Stef Willen on the couch.

Stef Willen: Join our party line. You never know how many real lesbians you'll hear at once.

The shot cuts to Nicole Paone.

Nicole Paone: It's important to stay friends with your exes.

The shot cuts to Nicole Johnson.

Nicole Johnson: My feet smell. I need new cleats.

The shot cuts to Kate Moennig.

Kate Moennig: Recycling and cuddling are important to me.

The shot cuts to Sandra Bernhard.

Sandra Bernhard: I need to get my tail braided for Octoberfest.

The shot cuts to Clea Duvall.

Clea Duvall: Has anyone seen my Tevas?

The shot cuts to Jen Kirkman.

Jen Kirkman: I can make those ribbons you like.

The shot cuts to Lucy Lawless.

Lucy Lawless (singing): Come to my window.

The shot cuts to Stef Willen on the couch.

Stef Willen: So let's chat on Lez Chat. What are you waiting for?

Stef Willen looks at the phone for a long moment.

Stef Willen: Seriously, why is everybody waiting?