ShatWow

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Ruester

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V.O.
Are you tired of pooping on the floor?
Close up on woman’s face. She nods “Yes”, shrugging.
V.O. (CONT’D)
...Tired of the dwindling newspaper industry shrinking your poo paper reserves?
The stack of newspaper in the corner starts to disappear until it’s gone.
V.O. (CONT’D)
...The preparation...
The woman tapes magazine pages together.
V.O. (CONT’D)
...the aggravation...
She can’t get the tape to work.
V.O. (CONT’D)
...Tired of the messy clean up?...
She carries a full, wrapped newspaper to the window, but it breaks before she can toss it, spilling its contents. She is “frustrated”
V.O. (CONT’D)
...The forgetful leave-behinds?...
A man finishes squatting and walks out of the bathroom as the woman steps out of the shower, fully wrapped in towels mind you, and steps in his mess.
V.O. (CONT’D)
Not to mention all the shoddy accessories that have been sold over the years!
Montage of...
Woman with a vacuum cleaner with a logo that reads “Poo Pusher”
Woman and/or man in the bathroom wearing cowboy boots and kicking the poo into a bucket.
She throws a ShamWOW over the mess and fumbles all over it.
V.O. (CONT’D)
Wish there was a better way?
The woman is crying and nods yes. An explosion graphic and the HOST appears.
HOST
Hi folks, Aza with ShatWOW. You’ll be saying Wow every time you BM from here on out! Now you’ll never again have to worry about the leg cramping, the messes, or the smell again! Here’s how it works. You get some water, you pour it in this tank here. Then you grab your little blue fun cake here and toss it in, and then you work it, you work it...
The Host drops a toilet bowl cleaning cake in the tank and thrusts his hands in, working the water like he was mixing meatloaf.
HOST (CONT’D)
Are ya getting this camera guy?
The host looks towards the camera.
HOST (CONT’D)
I said are you getting this camera guy?!
The host heads toward the camera and seemingly slaps the cameraman upside the head. The shot cuts away to a cat playing with a [brown cigar shaped catnip toy] and then cuts back to the HOST who’s face is now bloody.
HOST (CONT’D)
ShatWOW! Now the poo will stay off you for good!

[VARIOUS TESTICLES, OR TESTIMONIALS]
INT STUDIO
Host returns
HOST
You get the ShatWOW, you get the blue fun cakes, and if you call in the next 20 minutes, cuz we can’t do this all day, you’ll get the ShatWOW floor mat and dingleberry case absolutely free! ShatWOW, you’ll be saying WOW everytime.
INT WOMAN’S BATHROOM - DAY

JENI
Thank you ShatWOW!
Zoom out and she is seen sitting on the upper part of the toilet with her feet in the bowl.
JENI (CONT’D)
And it even comes with a foot washer!
A little bubble pops up in the corner with just the host’s bloody face saying...
HOST
It kills two smells in one swoosh!
They both laugh.
V.O.
Call Now!