Starring - Chris Kattan Featuring Ashley - Meryl Hathaway Sarah - Jen D'Angelo Coworkers - Jesse Klein, Matt Ingebretson, Kevin Hawkins, Andy Maxwell Intern - Taylor Stephens Director/Editor - Pat Bishop DP - Mike Manasewitsch Gaffer - Zach Zdziebko Effects Makeup - Chris Mills Production Design - Alexx Bonovich Sound - BoTown Sound
Ben Mendelsohn: (Voiceover) What are you?
Tom Hardy: I'm Gotham's reckoning.
Chris Kattan: Ah, yes. Hello. Are you
satisfied with your vehicle provider?
Chris Kattan: She hung up.
Chris Kattan: Are you the head of
Chris Kattan: Well, you sound
Chris Kattan: It's not a easy job.
Chris Kattan: No, I don't want to fax.
Where's someone who can help me?
Chris Kattan: I really feel like I get Dilbert now.
Chris Kattan: No, I'm not a recording. Why does
everyone think I'm a recording?
Chris Kattan: It's been difficult to make friends.
Chris Kattan: Hello. Hello.
Male Coworker: Hey Bane.
Chris Kattan: I'm [fragile] I have to
eat everything in liquid form.
Chris Kattan: It requires a series
Male Coworker 1: I'm Bane. I suffer from
Matt Ingebretson: I'm a gay robot. Ouch.
Chris Kattan: Hey, I don't sound like that.
Chris Kattan: I am a go robot. Oh my
God! I do sound like that.
Chris Kattan: (Voiceover) People handed me when
I enslaved back home.
Chris Kattan: Now, they hate me even more.
I'm sorry if your eating dinner.
Chris Kattan: I can't know what time you eat dinner.
Chris Kattan: I've been looking for new love.
Chris Kattan: Ashley.
Meryl Hathaway: Hey Bane. What's up?
Chris Kattan: I was just wondering if you are
not busy, we could go out sometime,
Chris Kattan: when you're not
Meryl Hathaway: Yeah. I totally would. I just have
a policy I don't date people from work.
Chris Kattan: Oh yeah. Yeah.
Meryl Hathaway: You know?
Chris Kattan: No. Yeah. We're all here.
We're the same inside.
Chris Kattan: [unintelligible] I'll be in my cubical.
Meryl Hathaway: Okay.
Chris Kattan: Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
Chris Kattan: [unintelligible] Oh! That's
a big [unintelligible]
Jen D'Angelo: I can't believe he asked you out.
Meryl Hathaway: I know. Can you even imagine.
Jen D'Angelo: Ooh!
Meryl Hathaway: Ooh!
Jen D'Angelo: And he wears that
gross vest like everyday.
Jen D'Angelo: I don't think he ever washes that thing.
Meryl Hathaway: No. I'm sure he never washes it.
Meryl Hathaway: He's disgusting. I wonder
what his apartment looks like.
Meryl Hathaway: Probably like
a garbage dump. Right.
Chris Kattan: Rrr. (slamming sounds)
Chris Kattan: No! Oh darn it.
Chris Kattan: Why did you sleep with Batman?
He was like totally against us.
Chris Kattan: I'll just take me some night classes,
Chris Kattan: going to get my GED.[unintelligible]
Chris Kattan: Yeah. It's a really great deal.
Chris Kattan: What? Really? You want
to buy a time share?
Chris Kattan: Yes! I sold a time share. I forgot to get
to get his credit card information.
Chris Kattan: Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.