What would it be like if women ran the writers room of the hottest new network sitcom?
- June 23, 2015
- 170k Views
Director: Carly Usdin
Producers: Brianne Trosie & Eleanor Winkler
Writer: Lindsay Kerns
Director of Photography: Mariscela Mendez
Cam Op: Victoria Chenoweth
Gaffer: Rachel Wells
Key Grip: Marissa Castrejon
Sound: Shannon Deane for Botown Sound
Production Design: Tricia Robertson
Makeup Artist: Rachel Kooyman
H&MU Assist: Laura Morton
Key PA: Mary Gulino
PA: Jessy Morner-Ritt
Graphic Designer: Heather Hanford
Graphic Design Assist: Olivia Kowalczyk
Editor: Adriana Robles
Post sound: Brenda Guadron
Showrunner: Margaret Cho
Barry: Amos Vernon
June 23, 2015
> Alright, alright you guys, you got notes from the network.
(long sighs are heard)
I know, I know. What are you going to do?
Alright, so, they loved Dana, loved Dana, hilarious, but 52% percent of her
audience is male, or whatever, so they want us to beef up Dan's character.
Maybe give him a little hobby.
> Oh, ok, I have a hobby for Dan,
but it's in my pants.
> Get it in there Dan.
> What about Dan tries stand-up?
> Oh, see that could be funny, because
everyone knows men aren't funny. So yeah, that's good.
> So bad at it.
> What if Dan has a hot guy friend?
> Do they talk with like, words?
> No, it's just that he has a hot guy friend.
> What if we give Dan a catch phrase like, "No way."
> Oh yeah, that's good.
> Or ooh, uh-uh.
> Or he could like do a little attitude finger.
> That's so close.
> Yes, and what if he's like struggling all day with like blue balls?
So he's real sensitive, like all day.
> Dana buys him that's like a swim suit
that's like a thong that doesn't fit, but he still doesn't want to hurt her feelings.
So he wears it all the time.
> What if he just goes full Game of Thrones? Just get
him raped up.
> If Dan gets raped, that's really...
> Is that too far?
> No, it's not.
> I don't think it's too far, it's just you know...how do you make it funny?
> Let's hold it there. Alright, we're close.
Rack your brains. We haven't really got...I mean we need Dan to
seem like a human man.
> What is that?
> That's impossible.
> Berry, hi--
> Sorry, me?
> Yeah, Berry--
> You're like an average, normal below average maybe attractive guy, sort of
middle class guy, I guess. Right? I mean, what do you think?
> I don't know about middle class. I do make $0.73 cents on the dollar.
> Ok, ok, alright Berry.
> We didn't ask you what you feel, we asked you what you thought.
What do you think, what do you think?
> Well I guess, I don't know how to fix Stan without destroying the premise of the show.
Stan's a dilf, why would he marry a duff? I know everyone is someone's duff, but
a buff dude like Dan with Dana? Dan's not a character, he's a prop.
He's a beautiful, hollow prop.
Berry, you know what, you are pretty smart for a diversity hire.
See guys, that's what we need. Dan needs a prop.
> A prop, yes.
> A prop.
> What if we get him a baby pig and after pole
dancing class the pig gets loose and he
is all oiled up,
and he has to catch the pig.
> Oh, that makes me hungry.
You know I think we should just break for lunch. Berry, would you mind taking our orders?
Thank you so much. Thank you so much.
(a soft piano instrumental plays)
> Can we go to Gratitude? I want the I Am.
> You're not thankful.
> And it wouldn't kill you to smile.
(a soft piano instrumental continues)
> Sike! That would never happen.