Episode 6: Zach has a chat with Charlize Theron, Academy Award winner and star of The Road.

Full Credits

Featuring Zach Galifianakis and Charlize Theron
Produced by Scott Aukerman and BJ Porter
Directed by Scott Aukerman
Edited by Daniel Strange
Special Thanks: Drew Antzis, Brittany Kahan, Brad Schulz and Ryan Perez

Transcript

(show music plays)
Zach Galifianakis: Hello, welcome to another episode of
Between Two Ferns.
Zach Galifianakis: I'm your host, Zach Galifianakis.
Zach Galifianakis: And my guest today is Charlize Theron (mispronounced).
Charlize Theron: Charlize Theron. It's ok, everybody does that.
Zach Galifianakis: Charlize Theron.
Charlize Theron: Theron, like heron, Theron.
Zach Galifianakis: Like heroin.
Charlize Theron: Yeah, no, just Theron. Just, start away.
Zach Galifianakis: So you were in Monsters, Inc.?
Charlize Theron: (laughs) No. That's humorous.
Zach Galifianakis: Oh, you were in the movie, Monster.
Charlize Theron: Monster. Yeah, just Monster.
Zach Galifianakis: Did you win an Oscar for that?
Charlize Theron: I did.
Zach Galifianakis: Where's your Oscar statue?
Charlize Theron: It's in my house.
Zach Galifianakis: It'd be cool if you hung from the rear view mirror
in your car, with a high school tassel.
Charlize Theron: (giggles) Where did that come from?
Charlize Theron: That stuff just hangs out in your head.
Charlize Theron: That's funny. Did you write it down?
Charlize Theron: You're really funny. Just remember it.
Zach Galifianakis: So it says here, you're a dog lover.
Charlize Theron: Yeah, very much.
Zach Galifianakis: Do you have a dog?
Charlize Theron: I have a few, yeah.
Charlize Theron: I adopt them and I actually just
recently adopted one from the pound.
Charlize Theron: He actually has this really horrible
disease called leishmaniasis and it's
like a cancer.
Charlize Theron: He's on medication right now, and
we hope he pulls through.
Charlize Theron: It's a pretty bad disease.
Charlize Theron: They don't know that much about
it here in America.
Zach Galifianakis: We have a new sponsor--
Zach Galifianakis: Is this camera?
Zach Galifianakis: Sorry about this. We have a new sponsor
of the show: Need for Speed Shift.
Zach Galifianakis: Which camera? This one?
Zach Galifianakis: Video game.
Zach Galifianakis: What's his name?
Charlize Theron: Oh boy.
Zach Galifianakis: Oh boy. Like, oh boy I wish my dog wasn't sick.
(she uncomfortably giggles)
Zach Galifianakis: You ok? Cause of the dog?
Charlize Theron: Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about it.
You're sweet for asking though.
Zach Galifianakis: What was your--
Zach Galifianakis: How often to do you go back
to South Africa?
Charlize Theron: I go quite a bit you know. Have you been?
Zach Galifianakis: Yes.
Charlize Theron: Did you go alone or did you go with a girlfriend,
Charlize Theron: or alone?
Zach Galifianakis: I have a girlfriend.
Charlize Theron: That's great.
Zach Galifianakis: She looks a little bit like you.
Charlize Theron: Really? Oh wow. That's such a nice
compliment. Thank you.
Zach Galifianakis: And a lot like Dog the Bounty Hunter.
Charlize Theron: (laughing) That's funny.
Charlize Theron: You must
make her laugh all the time.
Zach Galifianakis: It's warm in here.
Charlize Theron: Don't put this on camera.
Charlize Theron: (whispers) My thighs are so sweaty right now.
Charlize Theron: It's like dripping all the way to the back of my knees.
Charlize Theron: Look at this. See, I think the only thing that
Charlize Theron: could cool me off right now is if
Charlize Theron: I jump naked into a pool.
It's so fucking hot.
Zach Galifianakis: Are you asking me to go with you?
Charlize Theron: To where?
Zach Galifianakis: To the naked pool.
Charlize Theron: (laughing hysterically)
Charlize Theron: Oh my god, you
are hilarious.
Zach Galifianakis: I wasn't joking.
Charlize Theron: You know how you made it really funny,
is becuase the image of
Charlize Theron: me and you, like me naked in a pool with like a fat, garden gnome, like...
(she laughs more)
Charlize Theron: That's like really good.
Charlize Theron: You are really good.
You are really good.
Zach Galifianakis: I hope your dog dies.
Charlize Theron: (laughs) I just pissed myself.
(show music plays)

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