We've all seen the classic Good Cop, Bad Cop scene. But what happens when one cop is convinced he's actively shrinking?
- June 19, 2017
- 370k Views
Shrinking Cop: Eric Balfour
Good Cop: Isaac Nicholson
Perp: Benjamin Apple
Writers: Benjamin Apple, Jared Neumark
Director: Jared Neumark
DP: Benji Dell
Sound: Kara Johnson
Executive Producer: Darren Miller
June 19, 2017
- Look, you just tell me who your contact is,
I can make all of this go away.
- I don't know what you're talking about, man.
You got the wrong guy.
- Everybody else in this place,
they're not gonna go as easy on you.
If my partner gets in here--
(door latch clicks)
- Well look who it is.
I guess the piece-of-shit convention is in town.
- Come on, Hernandez, he doesn't deserve that.
- I just got one question for you, asshole.
Do I look
like I'm shrinking?
- Do I look like I'm actively shrinking?
- What do you mean, shrinking?
Getting shorter, tinier, smaller!
- Why would you be shrinking, that's crazy.
- Shooting star.
- Shooting star?
- I wanted to lose a little weight.
Ready for summer, you know.
So I made a wish on a shooting star.
Except, I wasn't specific enough.
I wished I was smaller.
Like the movie Big but in reverse.
- (spitting coffee) Yeah, asshole,
like the movie Big in reverse.
- [Good Cop] Come on, Hernandez, he's a good kid.
- Also that's crazy, right?
Like that's just a movie.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey!
You need to cool down.
You are not shrinking.
And even if you were,
Danny couldn't do anything about that.
- Yeah, man, I can't do anything about that, okay?
- Oh, I beg to differ.
You got any extra wishes saved up, asshole?
- If you don't gimme that wish right now, so help me God,
I am gonna shrink down this small
and crawl straight up your butt-hole.
- I'm the reasonable one, he is not.
- How's this supposed to get me to confess?
I thought he was gonna, like, beat me up or something.
- You wanna get beat up, huh?
- Just pick me up.
- I used to be able to do this, asshole!
I'm too small now!
Oh my God.
There, you see?
- No, you angled the pencil downward.
- [Hernandez] I didn't angle a fuckin' thing.
- Just tell us who your guy is
and I can make all of this go away.
But the longer you hold out,
the tinier and tinier he's gonna get.
- That's right, fuckface.
I am shrinking by the minute.
Woo, I'm gettin' small.
- What the fuck is happening?
What the fuck?
What the fuck?
- I'm coming for that butt-hole, baby.
I'm diving right in there!
- Okay, fine, yeah,
uh, my boss is Freddie the Freak.
It's Freddie the Freak, okay, I confess everything.
Don't let him go in my butt-hole, I need that.
- So tiny!
- All right, I'm convinced.
Nice work, Hernandez.
- High five.
(Good cop grunts)
All right, I gotta go call his wife.
Let her know what's goin' on.