Rob Lowe: Hey, guys!
Aziz Ansari: Hey, Rob. What's up?
Rob Lowe: So, what's going on?
Nick Offerman: You didn't hear? We're coming back on the air January Twentieth.
Woman: Can you believe it?!
Rob Lowe: W-w-wait a minute. Y-you mean we haven't been on TV?
Nick Offerman: Yeah, we, we're off the air for a couple months, but now we're back! Yeah!
Amy Poehler: But you knew that, right?
Rob Lowe: No, I did not fu**ing know that. How fu**ing long have I not been on television?!
Amy Poehler: Rob, this is good news.
Rob Lowe: What's good news? That this hasn't been on TV for five fu**ing months?!
Aziz Ansari: Ahh! My face!
Rob Lowe: Great. Now I'm out of coffee. You, production assistant? Look me in the face. Get the fu*k to Pete's Coffee, and get me a new coffee.
Aubrey Plaza: I'm on the show.
Rob Lowe: You are not.
Aubrey Plaza: Yeah, I am. I was...
Rob Lowe: Since when?
Aubrey Plaza: Since the beginning. I was on it before you.
Rob Lowe: You weren't. No one's been on the show before me. There was no fu**ing show before me. I am Robert Decifious Lowe!
Adam Scott: You are?
Amy Poehler: [Gasps]
Rob Lowe: And you. What have you ever done other than not being on television for five fu**ing months?!
Amy Poehler: I was on Saturday Night Live for a little bit.
Rob Lowe: Well, I hosted! And I just played paddle tennis with Lauren Michaels and Diane Sawyer, and I beat both those motherfu**ers! And I am fu**ing Miramax! So put that information up your a*shole. You know what? All of you, get the fu*k out. Get the fu*k out. Get out of my house!
Amy Poehler: What? You don't live here.
Rob Lowe: Get the fu*k out! Catch the new season of Parks and Recreation coming this January Twentieth on NBC.
Aziz Ansari: Ahh!
Adam Scott: Right after The Office.
Aziz Ansari: My face!