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One of the awards you won't see awarded at the Oscars will be for Best Handjob, which had many contenders this year.
Published February 24, 2013 1.8m views Immortal More Info ยป
Additional Credits
Additional Credits:
Created and Edited by Pat Bishop

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[MUSIC PLAYING]
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And it is my honor to present
the nominees for best handjob
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by an actress in a leading role.
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And the nominees are--
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ANNOUNCER: Amy Adams
in "The Master."
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Come for me.
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Yes.
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And no more of
that boy's hooch.
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No more hooch.
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Say it again.
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No more hooch.
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Come for me.
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Ow.
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Oh.
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ANNOUNCER: Laura Linney
in "Hyde Park on Hudson."
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LAURA (VOICEOVER):
I knew that we
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were now not just fifth
cousins, but very good friends.
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ANNOUNCER: Kristen
Stewart in "On the Road."
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[MOANING]
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Oh, man.
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ANNOUNCER: Joaquin
Phoenix in "The Master."
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Kristen Stewart's Other
Hand in "On the Road."
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[MOANING]
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Oh, man.
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And the Oscar goes to--
Kristen Stewart's Other Hand.
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ANNOUNCER: This is
the first Academy
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Award and nomination for
Kristen Stewart's Other Hand.

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