AIDS: We Did It!

Director

Elizabeth Banks

Actor

Adam Scott

Make Up Artist

Shauna O'Toole

Additional Credits [+]

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The video opens with Adam Scott and Elizabeth Wright Shapiro packing
office supplies into boxes. Ken Mitchell walks into the room carrying a
box.



Ken Mitchell: Hey guys, what should I do with all these AIDS prevention
pamphlets, just throw them out, right?



Adam Scott: Yeah. No reason to keep them now.



Ken Mitchell: Cool.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro pulls something out of a box.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: Great. Starbucks gift certificate. Expired.



Adam Scott: Oh, I got a job interview next week.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: Oh, that's awesome. Where?



Adam Scott: Breast cancer.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: Wow. I didn't know they were hiring.



Adam Scott: Yeah, I'd coordinate their races.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: Fingers crossed.



Adam Scott: Oh, did you want me to try and get you in there?



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: No, please. I submitted my resume to battered
women.



Ken Mitchell comes back in with a box full of red ribbons.



Ken Mitchell: Hey guys, what should I do with all these red ribbons.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: Just throw them out, Matt.



Ken Mitchell: Are you sure? I mean, red's up for grabs.



Adam Scott: Matt. Please.



Ken Mitchell nods.



Ken Mitchell: Hey, there's cake in Beth's office.



Ken Mitchell leaves.



Adam Scott picks up a picture.



Adam Scott: Ah, remember last year's fundraiser? We all sang karaoke
with Elton John.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: Totally. Rocket man.



Adam Scott laughs.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: Remember when we all went to India and passed
out all those condoms.



Adam Scott: It's been a good run.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: Man, this sucks.



Adam Scott: What?



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: It sucks they cured AIDS. There, I said it.



Adam Scott: Believe me, we're all thinking it.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: I know that millions of gay guys and Africans
aren't going to die now. And I know this is what we've been working all
these years for, but, I'm sorry, it's just like really shitty timing fo
me. You know?



Adam Scott: On Monday, Beth gave me a raise. Guess what happens,
Tuesday? They cure aids.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: I know there's no right time to cure AIDS, but
during a recession? Really?



Adam Scott: Recession? How about the worst economic meltdown since the
Great Depression.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: Scientists are such assholes.



Adam Scott: Yeah, no shit.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: Part of me is just like, what the fuck
happened to cancer? You know? I thought for sure they'd cure that shit
first.



Adam Scott: Yeah. What do they have, like, twenty ribbon colors now?



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: What kind of pussy ass disease gets cured in
like twenty years anyways? It took longer to cure fucking polio.



Adam Scott: What happened to the common cold? They still haven't cured
that.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: Right. So, basically, a cold is worse than
AIDS now. I'd rather get AIDS, than a cold.



Ken Mitchell pops his head back into the room. He's carrying a piece of
cake.



Ken Mitchell: Look who stopped by to say hi.



Brian Gallivan comes into the room. He has lesions on his forehead
consistent with AIDS.



Brian Gallivan: Hey. Hey.



Adam Scott: Oh, Jesus Christ.



Brian Gallivan: I just wanted to thank you guys for all the hard work
you've done. (claps Adam Scott on the shoulder) Thanks to you I'm gonna
live.



Adam Scott: Matt, is this a joke? (to Brian Gallivan) What is this?
Okay, congratulations, now go fuck yourself.



Brian Gallivan looks back and forth between Adam Scott and Elizabeth
Wright Shapiro.



Brian Gallivan (to Adam Scott): Fuck you.



Adam Scott: You too, Matt! Get the fuck out of here.



Brian Gallivan and Ken Mitchell leave the room.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: The balls on that guy. Jesus. Shit. I forgot
to mail my rent check.



Adam Scott: Oh, God damn it.



Elizabeth Wright Shapiro: I swear, this has been the worst fucking week.




The shot cuts the following text – AIDS We Did It!



The shot cuts to black.