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Ryan Lochte clears up any and all confusion surrounding peeing in pools.
Published August 09, 2012 750k views More Info »
Additional Credits
Additional Credits:
Starring - Ryan Lochte
Written/Directed by - Nick Corirossi and Charles Ingram
Producer - Betsy Koch
DP/Editor/Sound - Brian Lane
Special Thanks - Erika Wright and Shawn Zenga

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(whoosh sound)

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(laser sound)

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Ryan: Hey, welcome to LOCHTv.

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I'm here to answer a few questions.

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Voiceover: They say you pee
in the pool. Is that true?

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Ryan: Yes, that is very
true. The way I see it,

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the pool is the biggest and most expensive

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toilet and it's all mine.

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That's the only time
I allow myself to pee.

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Yes, I can only pee in the pool.

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Voiceover: What do you do otherwise?

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Ryan: I usually just hold it.

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I hold it in until I get to the pool.

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If I see a toilet, I'm
definitely not peeing there.

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Pathetic!

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You can't expect me to swim in this.

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What do you think I am, a borrower?

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I'm not a borrower, I don't
need to borrow anything.

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Like animals, they mark their territory,

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I pee in the pool. That's my territory.

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(music)

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It's really difficult,
there's a lot of training.

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You definitely first
start with the bathtub,

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then after the bathtub, you
go to a jacuzzi or a hot tub,

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and then after that, you work your way

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to the shallow end of the swimming pool,

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then if you can handle it,

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you gotta go to the deep end.

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Once you do that, you've gotten it.

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(music)

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I am gonna do a community outreach on

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getting the kids to pee in the pool.

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Kids, it IS okay to pee in the pool.

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I'm gonna start out small with the kids

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and then eventually I wanna move up to

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a winter sport and get
some yellow snow in there.

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Kid, pee in the pool ...

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But I can't stress this enough ...

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Do not EVER poop in the pool.

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Just don't do it.

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Peeing, good. Pooping, no.

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I won't tell anyone if you don't.

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If you poop in the pool,

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they shut down the whole entire pool

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and then I can't pee
because I pee in pools.

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(music)

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I have a book that's coming out ...

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"Fifty Shades of Yellow" ...

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It's supposed to be a #1 seller.

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My Podcast is a Peecast.

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I got a new rap album coming out

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in my alter-ego, Peeablo.

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I heard all these products
are gonna make a big splash.

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(music)

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The mark of a true champion is the gold.

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And I'll tell you what ...

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I pee gold ...

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When I'm a little dehydrated.

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Maybe I might get Michael Phelps in there,

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see who can pee the best.

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Voiceover: Michael Phelps is slow,

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do you think he's a slow peer?

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Ryan: You know what? I have
the fastest pee in the west.

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(western cowboy-type music)

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Next on LOCHTv,

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I'll teach you how to eat pizza
with a grill in your mouth.

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(guitar strumming)

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