Basic girls have loved Volkswagen Jettas for their environmental friendly vibe and... more »

Full Credits

Talent: Hannah Kasulka, Allison Fields, Vanessa Wolf
Writer/Director - Amos Vernon
Producer: Eleanor Winkler
DP: Matt Sweeney
Editor: Pascal De Maria
Sound: Gopal Bidari
Gaffer: Jenn Cohen
Key Grip: Brad Parr
HMU: Brenna Haukendahl
PA: Ben Parks
Special thanks: Courtney Macofsky

Stats & Data

Transcript

( music )
Dear Jetta,
you and I have been together
for a long time now.
I've loved you.
I drove you everywhere:
to picnics...
Coachella, Anthropologie.
Starbucks, Coachella,
a Jonah Hill Q and A
which was so funny.
Tim's place, Coachella.
We were a team.
I Instagrammed us with I don't
know how many sunsets.
Your cup holder's held
my pump spice lattes.
When I was having a bad day,
you gave me a private place
to cry into my infinity scarf.
And when I backed you into a parked
car, my dad payed for the repairs,
because he also liked you.
My dad liked you.
People saw you and thought,
I bet there's a hot girl in there.
And you know what?
They were right.
I was swept off my feet by
your supposed, clean diesel technology.
And I loved how you felt like
a little sports car,
like an Audi I could afford.
While your emissions were so low.
I felt like magic, and I love magic.
How was it possible?
It turns out it wasn't.
My bestie Snapchatted me
this morning, that
VW has admitted to installing
a device in 11 million
cars that conceals their
true emissions.
You're emitting up to 40 times
the nitrogen oxide
pollutants that were allowed
in the U.S..
You lied to me.
If there's one thing I love
more than Jettas,
it's being able to tell my
friends that I care about
the environment.
You took that away from me.
I trusted you! You ass hole.
You little shit dick.
Sure, Volkswagen has issued
a recall, and their
CEO has resigned, but it's
too late.
I can never trust you again.
We're breaking up, and I'm selling
you, and I'm never looking back.
Okay, byeee.
Good bye.
Good bye.
OMG, is that a Fiat?
So, cute.

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