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Full Credits

Writers / Directors: Nick Corirossi, Charles Ingram
Executive Producer: Owen Burke
Executive Producer: Christian Heuer
Producer: Bryson Pintard
Producer: Sean Boyle
Production Manager: Ross Buran
Cinematographer: Boa Simon
Additional Cinematography: Aaron Ulbrich
Additional Cinematography: Matt Sweeney
1st AC: Jenny Hou
Production Design: Libby Wampler
Art Director: Troy Miller
Art PA: Sam Herrera
Wardrobe: Gabi Perez
Make Up: Michelle Sfarzo
Make Up: Emily Rae Hilgenberg
Sound Mixer: Mike Robertson
Sound Mixer: Ben Foreman
Gaffer: Zac Baney
Gaffer: Stephen S Peter
Gaffer: :Colin Trenbeth
Key Grip: Coco Moore
Key Grip: Rene Yescas
Swing: Sean Ryan
Editor: Brad Schulz
Editor: Kegan Swyers
VFX: Caleb Swyers
VFX: Jack Bishop
Sound Designer: Sean Oakley
Title Graphics: Shawn James
Miniatures: Ian Pfaff
Frank Ippolito: Costume Fabricator
Redge Moonhopper: Jason Alexander
Train: Themselves
Sqwee-zl45: Keith David
Constable Zuvio: Josh Fadem
Kylo Ren: Austyn Jeffs / Nick Corirossi
Captain Phasma: Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter
Announcer: Chris Batstone
Rey: Kate Walsh
Finn: Allan MacLeod
Chewbacca: Bryson Pintard
Lydia Hearst: Herself
DJ Quals: Himself
Stormtrooper: Jon Milstein
Special Thanks: Roy Powers, Robert Estrada, "Droid Day" original composition by "Train"

Stats & Data

December 11, 2015


[theme music]
Austyn Jeffs / Nick Corirossi: Don't you worry BB.
I'll get you home in time for
Austyn Jeffs / Nick Corirossi: Droid Day, or my name isn't Kylo Ren.
[robot sounds]
Austyn Jeffs / Nick Corirossi: You're right. Ren is
technically a title.
Austyn Jeffs / Nick Corirossi: We know that now.
I'm probably a Skywalker or Solo
Austyn Jeffs / Nick Corirossi: according to popular rumor
out there in the galaxy...
Austyn Jeffs / Nick Corirossi: Uh.
Austyn Jeffs / Nick Corirossi: Whoa.
Austyn Jeffs / Nick Corirossi: That was the last of it.
Now strap your balls in BB8.
Austyn Jeffs / Nick Corirossi: We're headed to Tatooine.
Sorry, Jackoo.
Chris Batstone: Announcer: It's the hypothetical
Star Wars Holiday Special,
Chris Batstone: Announcer: based on internet rumor. Staring everyone's favorite
Chris Batstone: Announcer: Constable, Constable Zuvio.
Chris Batstone: Announcer: BB8.
Chris Batstone: Announcer: Caption Phasma.
Chris Batstone: Announcer: Kylo Ren.
Chris Batstone: Announcer: Introducing BB8's family.
Chris Batstone: Announcer: QT-Pi.
Chris Batstone: Announcer: The cantankerous Gr0mp-E.
Chris Batstone: Announcer: The Lil-8, and Jason
Alexander as Redge Moonhopper
Chris Batstone: Announcer: Keith David as Sqwee-zl45.
Chris Batstone: Announcer: R2D2.
Chris Batstone: Announcer: DJ Quals.
Chris Batstone: Announcer: Lydia Hearst.
Chris Batstone: Announcer: The original Droid's Day
song by Train.
Chris Batstone: Announcer: And Seaworld's Shamu.
[studio audience applause]
[robot sounds]
[robot sounds]
[robot sounds]
[studio audience applause]
[robot sounds]
[robot sounds]
Josh Fadem: Happy Droid day to you all.
[studio audience applause]
Josh Fadem: Greetings Qt-Pi, Gr0mp E,
and the Lil-8's.
Josh Fadem: It's me Constable Zuvio.
The Constable of Jackoo of course.
[robot sounds]
Josh Fadem: Not so loud. I came here
to warn you. Captain Phasma,
Josh Fadem: and the First Order are
on their way.
[robot sounds]
Josh Fadem: Good question Gr0mp-E.
Josh Fadem: We don't yet know what they
want, or why they're here,
Josh Fadem: or why there are still storm
troopers, and tie fighters
Josh Fadem: left after all the Empire
debatably fell.
Josh Fadem: Maybe everything will be okay?
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: By order of Supreme Leader Snoke
who is without a doubt
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: a motion capture [inaudible], Droid's
Day is cancelled.
Male Voiceover: Brand new
TFA merch only at Target.
Male Voiceover: Captain Phasma's plasma TV.
How about some Kylo Ren
Male Voiceover: oven mitts?
Male Voiceover: Set your laser's to stun,
and keep your eye on the
Male Voiceover: target. We don't even know
who this character is,
Male Voiceover: but why don't you buy a toy
for him? Only at Target.
[Chewbacca growls]
Male Voiceover: Uh, Chewie, I think I
just swallowed a fur ball.
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: That's right. We're putting
an end to Droid Day.
[robot sounds]
Josh Fadem: You can say all the Droid
Day expletives you know,
Josh Fadem: but they're the ones with
the blasters.
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: The only thing that would
change our mind is if
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: a droid would appear that
was so universally beloved
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: it would inspire the order,
because then as the
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: prophecy states, the Droid
Day savior will have arrived.
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: And Droid Day will rock
out to the break of dawn
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: with Train.
[robot sounds]
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: You want more time? Fine.
You have until both of
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: the two suns go down on this
never before scene planet.
Josh Fadem: Phew. That was a close one.
How are we going to
Josh Fadem: find this universally
loved Droid?
[robot sounds]
[he mimics the John
Williams, "Cantina" song]
Jason Alexander: Now, I am cutting you off
Jason Alexander: You've had enough oil.
Keith David: I'll tell you when I've
had enough.
Jason Alexander: Oh, why not.
It is Droid Day.
Jason Alexander: Captain Phasma? Whatever it
is, I didn't do it.
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: Relax oil [inaudible]
Redge Moonhoper.
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: I came her to check your
oil license.
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: Have you seen the droid that
was so universally beloved
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: it would inspire the order?
Jason Alexander: Can't say as I have.
Jason Alexander: How about you Sqwee-zl45?
Keith David: My maker didn't give
me eyes.
Keith David: I can't see.
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: This sure has been one
eventful Droid Day.
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: Sometimes I wish we could
skip the holidays all together.
Jason Alexander: Don't say that Captain Phasma.
Jason Alexander: The spirit of Droid Day isn't found not just in the
Jason Alexander: nuts and bolts of these
spiritless droids, but
Jason Alexander: in all of us. Droid Day
is a time to reflect on
Jason Alexander: all the ones you care for, and give praise, and thanks
Jason Alexander: to the droid god above.
Jason Alexander: Where are the ones you
care for on this Droidsmas?
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: All the other captains are working.
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: Heck, I've been working
so much, I haven't had
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: a moment like this to...
Jason Alexander: Reflect?
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: Yeah. Thanks Redge.
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: Merry Droid Day Redge Moonhopper.
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: Now, I better get
back to BB18.
Jason Alexander: Now what about you Sqwee-zl45? Why aren't you with
Jason Alexander: the ones you love on this
Keith David: Line up a few more glasses
of that oil Redge, and
Keith David: I will be.
Jason Alexander: Happy Droid Day Sqweeze.
Jason Alexander: Have some nuts.
[robot sounds]
Well, well, well, looks
like I'm getting a call from
my buddies Finn and Rey.
What's up guys?
Allan Macleod: Poe Dameron, you rogueish
character. You mind
Allan Macleod: lending Rey and I a hand?
You mean Luke Skywalker's
hand that was cut off
on Cloud City, along with
his light saber?
Kate Walsh: That's the one.
Allan Macleod: You're the best. Thanks.
I'll hand you this light
saber, probably in the film
which comes out
this Friday.
Josh Fadem: Oh no, they're coming.
Josh Fadem: We need a distraction
to buy more time.
Perhaps I could help with
said distraction.
Josh Fadem: Gosh wars. Anakin Skywalker.
What are you doing here?
Rumor has me thinks that
I make an appearance in
master J. J.'s new film.
Josh Fadem: That rumor was debunked.
[robot sounds]
Josh Fadem: Times almost up. We need a
a droid that everybody
Josh Fadem: agrees is likable, and fast.
Austyn Jeffs / Nick Corirossi: Are you looking for him?
[studio audience applauds]
[robot sounds]
Josh Fadem: Well, well, well, if it
ain't Kylo Ren.
[robot sounds]
Josh Fadem: Rumor has it, you and I
share a little kissy-kiss.
Austyn Jeffs / Nick Corirossi: Huh? That's not a rumor.
Josh Fadem: Ah shoot. Caught me in a
classic Zuvio lie.
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: Times up.
[robot sounds]
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: Produce the droid.
[robot sounds]
Jon Milstein: Oh my God. It's so cute.
Jon Milstein: Wow boss. Cool as I too.
And I've been pretty single
Jon Milstein: about this whole thing.
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: BB8, you are a droid we
can unanimously agree
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: upon without noticing
a thing. No mystery.
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: No conjecture.
[robot sounds]
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: Well, what are you standing
there for?
Wes Schlagenhauf / Jude Dexter: Lets celebrate Droid Day.
Josh Fadem: Please give it
up for Train.
♪ CL-BR8 ♪
♪ There's a couple times to
celebrate ♪
[robot sounds]
♪ All of every droids are here ♪
♪ CL-BR8 ♪
[robot sounds]
♪ Come on everybody
celebrate ♪
♪ 'Cuz Droid Day, only
comes twice a year ♪
♪ Interrogation droid
we tell you anything ♪
♪ 201-B runs the medical wing ♪
♪ R2D2 left from the start ♪
♪ vulture droids can't
tear us apart ♪
Droid day is in all of our
hearts. We look forward to it.
Let's come together for
this magical time.
♪ Come on everybody celebrate ♪
♪ 'Cuz droid doy only
comes twice a year ♪
[Chewbacca sounds]
[robot screams]