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Huge thanks to Brendan Mulhern... more »
Published November 04, 2013 20 views More Info ยป
5 Funny Votes
1 Die Votes
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Published November 04, 2013
I do motherfucking improv
That's how I get my motherfucking rocks off
One stage, two chairs, is all I need cuz
I do fucking improv

Classes at the UCB, stage time at the PIT
Did a show at IO West, yo that was the shit
Call backs for Boom Chicago, but didn't get it
Amsterdam, hell yes. Cruise ship? Forget it
Played with Susan Messing, Besser gave me hits of chronic
Saw TJ and Dave way before he hit the Sonic
Greyhound to the festivals, hitting every city
Yeah, I'll be at Del Close but the slot I got is pretty shitty
Assscat 3000, you my dawg
Did an Armando once, Horatio Sanz did the monologue
I wanna like L.A. but I can't afford the Ground-langs
Tried out for Who's Line, I got cut at second round. Thanks.

I do motherfucking improv
That's how I get my motherfucking rocks off
One stage, two chairs, is all I need cuz
I do fucking improv, I do fucking improv

I don't do short form, fuck that shit
Unless I'm paid for an outgig then I rock that shit
I usually do the Harold, but it's not your classic Harold
It's a modified Harold, you've never seen it before, bitch
I coach a troupe, they're fucking green
They still use a sweep to end every scene
And I don't really care, but I'll always be there
Cuz I'm trying to fuck that girl who just turned eighteen
(show time!)
Grab my flannel shirt, run my hand through my beard
And I pop a couple Xanax so I don't feel too weird
Depressed, anxious, awkward, that's me
But when I hit the stage I'm motherfucking free

I do motherfucking improv
That's how I get my motherfucking rocks off
One stage, two chairs, is all I need cuz
I do fucking improv, I do fucking improv

My warm ups are organic, my troupe has one hispanic
Don't panic, the get's Titanic, I'll play a manic mechanic
This scene is fucking magic, the laughter is gigantic
The audience loves my antics, which is why I'm such an addict
That show was fucking classic, I'm all aglow
Time for twenty minutes of notes for a thirty minute show
Crack me a PBR or a cold Natty Boh
That girl in the audience, where the fuck did she go?
If only there were scouts, I know I'm gonna make it
My parents say I'm dreaming, but fuck I'm not awake yet
I love it, I need it, I don't care if I ain't famous
Life is a scene, and I know what the game is

I do motherfucking improv
That's how I get my motherfucking rocks off
One stage, two chairs, is all I need cuz
I do fucking improv
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