Ted Cruz shares his tips on how to win a GOP debate and climb the presidential... more »
Published December 14, 2015 180k views More Info »
Full Credits
Additional Credits
Additional Credits:
Starring - Ryan Perez
Written and Directed by Ryan Perez
Edited by Kegan Swyers
Stats & Data
1,437 Funny Votes
935 Die Votes
183,110 Views
Published: December 14, 2015
Transcript

[music]
Hey there. It's me,
Ted Cruz.
Your nations next President-ial Candidate
in the years 20 and 2024.
You know, people ask me
all the time,
"Ted, how do you do it.
How do you win every
single debate that
you're in?"
And I got to say, it's
not just about the point
that I make, it's about
the faces I make after
the points that I make.
Male Voiceover: The Reagan.
Male Voiceover: The Clinton.
Male Voiceover: The Stubbed Toe.
And you too can unlock
the power of making
great faces after your
points using my series
of instructional face
making video tape.
Male Voiceover: The I'm a Little Stinker.
Male Voiceover: The Nixon.
Male Voiceover: The Shame on You.
Male Voiceover: The Please Don't Hit Me.
Male Voiceover: The Fat John Hamm.
I'm proud to lead the
fight against Planned Parenthood.
Male Voiceover: The I have a Secret.
What you have hear is a
debate between the
Bolsheviks and the
Mensheviks.
Male Voiceover: The Triumphant Quipper.
And eliminate the IRS.
Male Voiceover: The Duuuuhhoooiii.
So order today, and start
making faces at the
end of all of your points.
(voiceover) Order today.
[Funny or Die ending jingle]

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