Raaaaaaaandy - Part 2 (Funny People)

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The video opens with the following text: The following is the second part of a documentary about a comedian named Randy, whose cameo in the film “Funny People” is catapulting him to fame.

Laugh Your Dick Off Media Presents Raaaaaaandy

A montage of clips, featuring Aziz Ansari as Randy, is played.

Part Two: Randy’s Process

Aziz Ansari: Who’s the comedian I watch the most? Chris Rock? Eddie Murphy? No. Randy. I watch my own stuff so I can become a better performer.

Shot cuts to Aziz Ansari watching clips of himself.

Aziz Ansari (from clip): I’m not going to take a shit. I’m making you a smoothie.

Aziz Ansari (on couch): Do you see how I said that? (plays clip repeatedly, mouthing along) In that set, I changed the dance. So it’s, I’m gonna get my fuck on. I’m gonna get my fuck on. (clip shows the dance) And the response was way better. Not laughter wise, but after the show people were doing the dance. In the future, who knows? I might be able to make a video where I teach you how to do that dance along with the other Randy dances.

A set of clips, showing the various Randy dances, are played.

Aziz Ansari: My process is a lot of trial and error. When I said, “You gotta take a shit,” I would just go down like I was taking a shit. (clip of this is shown) Which is funny cause it’s like I’ve taken a shit, but in other sets what I would do is like, “You gotta take a huge shit.” (spins around while speaking) And people went nuts. (clip is shown) I did six spins and laughs went up 20%. I look at audio recordings of my sets…

Shot cuts to Aziz Ansari at a computer.

Aziz Ansari: …wave files. I analyze the peaks and troughs. And that’s how I tell how funny I’m being.

The shot cuts to Aziz Ansari looking through a filing cabinet.

Aziz Ansari: Oh, this is awesome. This is my file cabinet, where I keep all my jokes. I organize them by topic. This is all material about getting my dick sucked. This is all material about eating pussy. Right here, this is all Jewish material. Asian girls I hooked up with.

Shot cuts to Aziz Ansari in a closet.

Aziz Ansari: I’ve even got some old Randy memorabilia here. I think I’ve got an old headshot in here. Oh, check it out. It’s my old badge. I used to be a cop. I shot a kid by mistake and I got kicked out. It was messy.

Randy on the Road

The shot cuts to Randy looking a large map with pushpins in it.

Aziz Ansari: This is the map. These are all the cities I performed in and I have a little key to help me remember each city. Like, the blue pin means it was a college gig. The green pin means I was an opener. LP means I laid pipe, you know, had sex with someone. White pin means, fingered her but she didn’t touch my dick. Red pin, LC, laid cable. Means I was able to take a shit at the club. When you go to these venues sometimes you’re doing multiple shows a night. A guy like me, at some point, I’m gonna have to take a shit. Most of these are from the Randy’s Gonna Wet Ya comedy tour. A tour I did with some buddies of mine.

The shot cuts to Aziz Ansari, Jarrett Grode, Josh Simpson, and Harris Wittels by the side of the road

Aziz Ansari, Jarrett Grode, Josh Simpson, and Harris Wittels in unison: Randy’s gonna wet ya!

Harris Wittels: Yeah, Randy’s been great to be on tour with. He’s super chill, down to earth.

Josh Simpson: He’s been really generous and it’s been a blast on the road. I mean, we’re just always having fun. Playing crazy tricks on one another.

Shot cuts to Aziz Ansari, Jarrett Grode, Josh Simpson, and Harris Wittels standing on a cliff edge.

Aziz Ansari: You like that hat? Fuck your hat!

Aziz Ansari rips hat of off Josh Simpson’s head and throws it off the cliff.

Aziz Ansari (laughing): I just threw that off a cliff.

Shot cuts to Aziz Ansari, Jarrett Grode, Josh Simpson, and Harris Wittels eating lunch. Aziz Ansari slaps Harris Wittels sandwich into the trash and laughs.

Aziz Ansari: You guys see that.

Harris Wittels: That’s a good shot Randy.

Aziz Ansari: What do you got there man?

Josh Simpson: Beef sandwich.

Aziz Ansari: Can I have a bit? Is it good?

Aziz Ansari throws the sandwich into the trash and laughs.

Aziz Ansari: I threw you all’s sandwiches in the trash.

Shot cuts to Jarrett Grode, Josh Simpson, and Harris Wittels sitting together.

Jarrett Grode: It’s not like work. This is not like regular work.

Harris Wittels: I can’t believe I get paid to do this. I love it. I would pay to do this.

Josh Simpson: I actually do pay to do this.

Harris Wittels: We all pay a little bit to do this.

Jarret Grode: Randy, he’s absolutely had a big impact on my act.

Shot cuts to Jarret Grode performing standup.

Jarrett Grode: You ever notice how one more cookie has a tendency to turn into ten more cookies?

Aziz Ansari: You suck! You ever noticed how one of your shitty jokes turns into ten of your shitty jokes.

Audience laughs.

Jarrett Grode: You guys are gonna love this.

Aziz Ansari: Boo.

Audience: Boo.

Aziz Ansari: Randy! Boo.

Jarrett Grode: Seriously guys, wait, wait, wait, whoa. That booing is kinda fucking up my head.

Aziz Ansari: That joke sucked.

Shot cuts to Aziz Ansari performing standup.

Aziz Ansari: You all ever noticed how one more cookie turns into ten more cookies!

Audience explodes in laughter.

Aziz Ansari: Damn, where’d all these cookies come from?

Shot cuts to back to Jarrett Grode, Josh Simpson, and Harris Wittels sitting.

Jarrett Grode: Randy has never taken anything from me. He has…

Josh Simpson: He upgraded the joke. He doesn’t steal jokes he upgrades them.

Jarret Grode: Yeah. Upgrade.

Shot cuts back to Aziz Ansari doing standup. He is acting like he is eating cookies like an insane person.

Aziz Ansari: Give me some milk!