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Erin challenged Bryan to throw ice for ALS! So instead he's just gonna write them a... more »
Published August 26, 2014 29k views More Info »
Additional Credits
Additional Credits:
Starring Erin Gibson & Bryan Safi
Written by Erin Gibson & Bryan Safi
Producer: Ross Buran
Producer: Ben Sheehan
Camera Op: Cristina Dunlap
Editor: Ian Skalski
Camera Op: Matt Sweeney
Art: Tricia Robertson
Follow Erin & Bryan on Twitter
Erin:
http://www.twitter.com/gibblertron
Bryan:
http://www.twitter.com/bryansafi

1

>: (ERIN):
THIS IS...

2

(ERIN AND BRYAN TOGETHER):
THROWING SHADE.

3

>: (BRYAN):
WHERE FEMINASTY ERIN GIBSON,

4

>: (ERIN):
AND HOMOSENSUAL BRYAN SAFI,

5

>: (BRYAN):
TAKE A LOOK AT THE HEADLINES AND POLITICS,

6

>: (ERIN):
AND POP CULTURE,

7

>: (BRYAN):
AND TREAT THEM WITH MUCH

8

LESS RESPECT THAN THEY DESERVE.

9

(ERIN): CAN YOU HANDLE IT?

10

>: I CHALLENGE YOU TO THE
ICE BUCKET CHALLENGE.

11

>: OH BOY.
>: YOU HAVE TO DO IT.

12

>: YOU KNOW WHAT?
WRITE THE FUCKING
CHECK. I DON'T

13

WANT TO SEE YOU WET.
>: I'M NOT WET. YOU'RE GOING

14

TO BE WET.
>: OH, YOU'RE ACTUALLY
CHALLENGING ME?

15

>: YEAH.
>: I'LL WRITE A CHECK.
I'M HAPPY TO WRITE

16

A CHECK. I'VE GOT-- MONEY?
NO ISSUE, EVER. SPEAKING OF

17

WHICH, DEREK, MY BOYFRIEND,
WAS OUT OF TOWN THIS WEEKEND--

18

>: YES.
>: --SO IT WAS LIKE
TOTAL BACHELOR WEEKEND

19

BECAUSE I WAS LIKE...
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN LIKE,

20

I'M OUT FOR MYSELF THIS
WEEKEND.
>: GOD.

21

>: MY FIRST TIME WAS I'M
NOT SHOWERING.

22

>: THIS ISN'T A DROUGHT
THING?
>: NO.

23

>: YOU'RE JUST PLAIN NOT
SHOWERING--
>: NO. IT'S

24

SO JUST LIKE, IT HURTS
WHEN YOUR ARMS--

25

>: WHAT? IT'S TOO MUCH EFFORT?
>: I DON'T LIKE IT.

26

>: YOU LITERALLY STAND TO HAVE
WATER POURED ON YOU--
>: IT'S SO--

27

IT'S SO BORING.
>: WHY DON'T YOU JERK
OFF IN THE SHOWER?

28

MAKE IT FUN.
>: NO, I CAN'T CUM
STANDING UP.

29

SO THIS IS WHAT I DID, THE
SECOND THING THAT I WANTED

30

TO DO WHICH IS THE
HIGHLIGHT OF MY LIFE--
>: ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT IS YOU

31

JERKING OFF--
>: --STANDING UP?

32

>: NO LAYING DOWN.
LAYING DOWN'S WORSE.
(he imitates the sound of masturbating)

33

>: IT IS?
>: LIKE A FLAT STRAIGHT
LAY DOWN.

34

>: IT'S SO EASY.
>: WHAT ABOUT SITTING DOWN?

35

>: YEAH I COULD CUM SITTING DOWN.
>: BUT LAYING DOWN,

36

SITTING DOWN IN A SHADE?
>: YEAH ONLY.

37

>: WHAT ABOUT ABOUT A POOL--
>: WITH A HUGE HAT.

38

>: OH, OK.
>: YEAH.

39

>: SO UM, OK THEN MY--
>: YOU CAN'T CUM STANDING UP...

40

>: I MEAN I GUESS I COULD,
IT JUST TAKES MORE EFFORT.

41

>: YOU NEVER JERKED OFF INTO
A SINK FOR CLEANLINESS?

42

>: NO.
>: KEEP IT TIDY?

43

>: I USED TO JERK MY
EX-HUSBAND OFF INTO A

44

SINK ALL THE TIME.
>: WHY?

45

>: BECAUSE HE LOVED IT.
>: HOW LOW WERE YOUR SINKS?

46

>: THE HIGHEST SINKS YOU COULD--
>: WELL THEN

47

HOW DID HE DO IT?
>: WELL HE
STANDS ON MY

48

SHOULDERS AND I DO IT
LIKE THIS.
>: OH, OH... OK.

49

HOW FUN--
>: WE'RE NOT--
>: AND SEXY, I MEAN

50

HE MUST CUM IN 30 SECONDS.
>: ONE THING I MISS

51

ABOUT BEING MARRIED TO HIM.
>: THAT'S THE THING?

52

>: I-- BY THE WAY, I JUST CAN'T GET
OVER YOU NOT BEING ABLE TO

53

JERK OFF STANDING UP.
>: WELL GET OVER IT,

54

BECAUSE GUESS WHAT, YOU KNOW WHAT,
YOU'VE REALLY TURNED THE TABLES

55

HERE, BECAUSE THERE'S ONE
THING I CAN'T GET OVER--

56

SOMEONE STANDING ON YOUR
SHOULDERS, WITH YOUR HAND ABOVE--

57

>: NUDE, I'M FULLY CLOTHED,
THEY'RE NUDE. IT'S

58

LIKE HOW YOU PET AN
ELEPHANT.
>: NO ONE

59

PETS ELEPHANTS LIKE THAT.
>: IN INDIA-- GO TO INDIA.

60

>: YOU STAND NOT FACING IT
AND YOU GO LIKE THIS?

61

THAT'S INSANE. NO.

62

NO.
>: YEAH, THAT'S HOW YOU
PET AN ELEPHANT.

63

>: ERIN, THE ANSWER IS NO TO
EVERYTHING YOU'VE SAID TODAY.

64

>: WHY DIDN'T YOU SHOWER ALL
WEEKEND, THAT'S EVEN WORSE,
I HAVE TO BE VERY HONEST WITH YOU--

65

>: BECAUSE IT WAS BACHELOR
IN PARADISE. I WAS DOING

66

BACHELOR IN PARADISE--
I HAD SOME FRIENDS ASK ME TO

67

MEET THEM AT A BAR AT
MIDNIGHT ON SATURDAY--

68

>: OF ALL THINGS--
>: AT MIDNIGHT.

69

AND I WAS SITTING AT
HOME, COCONUT OIL

70

ON MY FACE READING ANA
GARDENS' COOKBOOK WATCHING

71

JUDGE JUDY.
>: UH. THAT'S DISGUSTING.

72

>: MY DREAM, AND I CAN ONLY
DO IT ALONE. SO WAS I GOING

73

TO GO TO A BAR AT MIDNIGHT?
ABSOLUTELY NOT.

74

>: DID YOU JERK OFF WHEN YOU
WERE DOING ALL OF THAT STUFF--

75

>: IT'S SO EASY, BECAUSE I
JUST GO LIKE THIS--

76

>: COCONUT OIL. RIGHT THERE,
AND RIGHT INTO

77

ANA GARDENS' RECIPE
FOR SPAGHETTI.

78

>: THAT WOULD NEVER--
I WOULD NEVER DO
THAT TO HER.

79

>: YOU'D NEVER DEFACE HER
BOOK LIKE THAT?
>: NEVER.

80

>: WELL WHAT ABOUT HER--
THERE'S PICTURES OF FOOD.

81

>: I DON'T KNOW. I THOUGHT I
HAD THE CRAZY STORY ABOUT

82

THE COCONUT OIL, AND ALL THAT
, LIKE, AND NOT SHOWERING--

83

>: BUT NO, BECAUSE YOU--
>: HOW COULD YOU EVER QUESTION

84

ONE MOVE I'VE EVER MADE
IN MY LIFE.
>: HERE'S THE THING.

85

YOU THINK IT'S CRAZY,
BUT IT'S BUSINESS AS USUAL
FOR YOU.

86

>: OH, I THINK IT'S BUSINESS
AS USUAL AS WELL.

87

I WAS NOT EXPECTING WHAT
YOU SAID, BUT I GUESS

88

I'M HAPPY YOU SAID IT--
>: WELL...
>: --BECAUSE

89

IT MADE ME SEEM LIKE I HAD
A PRETTY TAMED WEEKEND.

90

WHICH ACTUALLY I DID.
>: I DID USED TO JERK MY HUSBAND

91

OFF INTO A SINK.

92

93

>: THINGS ARE HAPPENING ALL
OVER THE COUNTRY. THEY ARE

94

LOOKING GOOD.
>: FOR WHAT?

95

(he sings the McDonald's theme song)

96

>: WHAT IS THAT?
>: I'M LOOKING IT.

97

POPEYE.
>: POPEYE SINGS THAT?
>: YEAH.

98

>: NO HE DOESN'T.
WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS--

99

WE'VE BEEN DOWN THIS ROAD.
>: MCDONALDS.

100

>: MCDONALDS.
>: YEAH.

101

>: HE SINGS THAT.
VERY EXCITING IN ARKANSAS OF

102

ALL PLACES. A NEW--
>: ORDINANCE.
>: --YES.

103

WAS PUT UP BY AN ALDERMAN,
WHICH I GUESS--
DO YOU KNOW THAT TERM?

104

>: YES.
>: I NEVER KNEW IT.

105

>: IT'S LIKE AN OMBUDSMAN RIGHT?
>: LIKE A CITY COUNCIL

106

MEMBER BASICALLY--
>: YEAH. THEY HAVE THEM
IN CHICAGO.

107

>: THIS GUY MATTHEW PERRY.
>: WHAT?

108

STRAIGHT FROM FRIENDS?
>: PETTY...
>: OH.

109

>: SORRY.
>: LORI PETTY'S DAD?
>: YEP.

110

SO HE PUT UP-- PUT FORTH
THIS NEW CIVIL RIGHTS

111

LEGISLATION THAT WOULD
BASICALLY--
>: JUST FOR THE CITY?

112

>: JUST FOR THE CITY.
JUST FOR FAYETTEVILLE.
>: OH.

113

>: SO THAT YOU COULDN'T
DISCRIMINATE AGAINST--

114

>: LGBTT--
>: YES.
>: YEAH.

115

>: AND, I'LL READ IT TO YOU,
THE ACT DEFINES

116

DISCRIMINATION AS ANY
ACT POLICY OR PRACTICE

117

THAT HAS THE EFFECT OF
SUBJECTING ANY PERSON

118

TO DIFFERENTIAL TREATMENT
AS A RESULT OF THEIR RACE,

119

ETHNICITY, NATIONAL ORIGIN,
AGE, GENDER, GENDER

120

IDENTITY, GENDER EXPRESSION,
DISABILITY, OR

121

VETERAN STATUS--
>: HE WAS LIKE,
CHECK, CHECK, CHECK...

122

>: CHECK, CHECK... EXACTLY.
YOU CAN'T FIRE ANYONE

123

FOR BEING GAY--
>: GREAT, WAY TO GO MATTHEW PETY.

124

>: YEAH. ONE WOMAN IN
PARTICULAR WAS NOT ABOUT THIS

125

ANTI-DISCRIMINATION LAW.
SHE IS ONE OF THE MOST

126

GLAMOROUS CELEBRITIES ON
THE PLANET.
>: OH, (inaudible)?

127

>: CLOSE, MICHELLE DUGGAR.
>: OH.

128

>: YEAH, A NATIONAL TREASURE.
>: ERIN: SHE'S THE WHITE BEYONCE.

129

>: BRYAN: IT'S THE WHITE BEYONCE.
IF YOU DON'T KNOW

130

WHO SHE IS, SHE'S THE MOTHER

131

IN 19 KIDS AND COUNTING.
>: SHE'S KEEPING THE SPLIT

132

CURLED BANG ALIVE.
>: SHE IS ABSOLUTELY--

133

>: SHE TAKES HER BANG, GOES
IN TWO QUADRANTS.

134

>: YEAH.
>: THIS QUADRANT GETS ROLLED DOWN.
>: YEP.

135

THIS QUADRANT GETS ROLLED UP.
BRUSH, BRUSH, BRUSH--

136

>: YEAH.
>: --STYLE.
>: SHE'S ALSO THE MATRIARCH

137

OF THE MOST NAUSEATING
FAMILY IN TELEVISION--

138

>: ERIN: WELL BECAUSE SHE'S
ALWAYS PREGNANT.
>: --FOR SURE.

139

THOSE KIDS GET UNHEALTHIER,
EACH WEEK SHE DROPS.

140

>: YEAH.
>: WHEN I THINK OF THINK
OF MICHELLE DUGGAR,

141

DO YOU WANT TO KNOW
SOMETHING, IT MAKES ME

142

LIKE WEEK IN THE KNEES BECAUSE
I FEEL SO BADLY FOR HER,

143

AND FOR ALL OF THOSE
CHILDREN.
>: IT'S A CULT.

144

>: MICHELLE DUGGAR--
>: IT'S A FAMILY CULT.
I SAID IT.

145

>: MICHELLE DUGGAR IS GOING
TO DO A ROBOCALL. SHE DID

146

THIS ON BEHALF OF A GROUP
CALLED THE FAMILY COUNSEL.

147

THEY CLAIMED THAT THE
NON-DISCRIMINATION BILL

148

THREATENS TO INFRINGE ON
THE RIGHTS OF CHURCHES

149

WHICH IS ALWAYS THE DUMBEST
ARGUMENT.
>: HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT?

150

IF YOU WANT RIGHTS, PAY TAXES.
>: I'LL READ THE ROBOCALL

151

TO YOU NOW, BUT IT WAS A
CLASSIC MICHELLE DUGGAR,

152

FRENCH BRAID SCENARIO. SHE
TOOK SOMETHING THAT WAS

153

AN ANTI-DISCRIMINATION BILL
THE WAY MANY CONSERVATIVES

154

DO, AND MAKE IT ABOUT RELIGION,
AND MAKE IT ABOUT

155

SAFETY FOR CHILDREN. SO I'LL BE
MICHELLE DUGGAR, AND

156

YOU'LL BE THE PERSON I CALL.
RING-RING...

157

>: HELLO.
>: HELLO. THIS IS MICHELLE DUGGAR.
>: HI.

158

>: I'M CALLING--
>: OH, WAIT.

159

>: --TO INFORM YOU OF SHOCKING
NEWS THAT WILL EFFECT

160

THE SAFETY OF NORTH WEST ARKANSAS
WOMAN AND CHILDREN.

161

>: IS THIS A ROBOT?
>: THE FAYETTEVILLE CITY
COUNCIL

162

IS VOTING ON AN ORDINANCE THIS
TUESDAY NIGHT THAT WOULD

163

ALLOW A MAN TO USE WOMEN
AND GIRL'S RESTROOMS,

164

LOCKER ROOMS--
>: WHAT?
>: --SHOWERS--

165

>: WHAT?
>: --SLEEPING AREAS, AND OTHER AREAS
THAT ARE DESIGNATED

166

FOR FEMALES ONLY.
>: WELL YOU KNOW
ONCE I DID USE

167

A MEN'S RESTROOM--
>: I DON'T BELIEVE THE CITIZENS

168

OF FAYETTEVILLE WOULD WANT
MALES TO PASS CHILD PREDATOR

169

CONVICTIONS THAT CLAIM
THAT THEY ARE FEMALE--

170

>: WHAT?
>: (he cracks up laughing)

171

>: --HAVE THE LEGAL RIGHT TO
ENTER PRIVATE AREA'S THAT

172

ARE RESERVED FOR WOMAN AND GIRLS--
>: WELL, THEY'RE NOT GOING--

173

>: --WE SHOULD NEVER PLACE THE
PREFERENCE OF AN ADULT
OVER THE SAFETY

174

AND INNOCENCE OF A CHILD. PARENTS--
>: YEAH,

175

I DON'T HAVE ANY KIDS--
>: --WHO DO YOU WANT UNDRESSING
NEXT TO YOUR

176

DAUGHTER AT THE PUBLIC SWIMMING
POOL, BY THE CHANGING AREA--

177

>: WELL, NOBODY REALLY, BUT WHY
WOULD-- WHY WOULD ANYBODY--

178

>: GOOD BYE.
>: WHY WOULD ANYBODY
GET NAKED--

179

>: CLICK.
>: --AT A SWIMMING POOL? HELLO?
>: WELL, DONE. SO,

180

WHAT SHE'S DONE HERE, IS SHE HAS
TAKEN SOMETHING

181

THAT SAID YOU CAN'T FIRE GAY PEOPLE
BECAUSE THEY ARE GAY,

182

AND SHE HAS TAKEN THAT AND MADE
IT SO THAT WHAT THIS IS ABOUT

183

ALL OF A SUDDEN IS THAT TRANSGENDER
WOMAN, WHO SHE CALLS

184

MEN WHO DRESS UP AS WOMAN,
WILL COME INTO PUBLIC RESTROOMS,

185

AND USE THE RESTROOM THERE
IN FRONT OF LITTLE GIRLS.

186

>: IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH
THE LEGISLATION THAT

187

WAS PUT FORTH. NOTHING.
WHAT SHE IS TALKING
ABOUT IS

188

A TRANSGENDER WOMAN,
A.K.A. A WOMAN, CAN
USE THE WOMAN'S

189

RESTROOM IF SHE SO CHOOSES
WHICH SHE WOULD BECAUSE

190

SHE'S A WOMAN. GUESS WHAT?
THIS BILL PASSED, 60 TO 2.

191

WHICH IS SO EXCITING.
>: WHO WERE THE 2 PEOPLE?

192

>: MICHELLE DUGGAR--
>: UP BANG AND DOWN BANG?

193

>: (laughs) YES, EXACTLY.
ALSO INTERESTING FACT,

194

MICHELLE DUGGAR'S SON SERVES
ON THE FAMILY RESEARCH

195

COUNCIL WHICH IS--
>: (sighs)

196

>: --YES, WHICH IS TONY PERKINS
WHO BASICALLY

197

COMPARES GAY PEOPLE TO NAZI'S,
AND SAID THAT HITLER

198

WAS GAY, AND ALL THIS
CRAZY SHIT.
>: I'M GLAD THERE ARE SO MANY

199

OF THESE FAMILY MEMBERS THAT
ARE DOING GOOD IN THE WORLD.

200

>: THE ODDS ARE THAT IF YOU
HAVE 19 CHILDREN, JUST THE

201

WAY THE CHIPS FALL, ONE
OF THEM IS GAY.
>: YEAH.

202

>: SO YOU'RE A TERRIBLE PERSON
ALL THE WAY AROUND.

203

>: I HOPE THEY'RE ALL GAY AND
THEY COME OUT THE CLOSET,

204

AND THEY REVAMP THE
VILLAGE PEOPLE.
>: UH-HUH.

205

>: AND THEY CALL IT THE
GLOBAL VILLAGE PEOPLE,

206

BECAUSE THERE'S SO
MANY OF THEM.
>: OH SURE.

207

>: SO THEY GOT TO FIGURE OUT
WHAT CONSTRUCTION WORKER,

208

POLICEMAN, NATIVE AMERICAN--
>: RIGHT.

209

>: --AND WHAT ELSE?
>: CURTAIN HANGER--

210

>: YEAH. ICE CREAM MAKER--
>: COBBLER.
>: --COBBLER, YEAH.

211

SKUNK IMPERSONATOR.
>: YEP.

212

THEY'RE ALL THERE.
>: WELL, I THINK WE COVERED
THEM ALL ACTUALLY.

213

214

>: YOU OK?
>: NO, I'M FINE.

215

>: WHY ARE YOU OK?
TANLINES IS HERE.

216

>: I KNOW, ERIC AND JESSE.
>: WAIT, DO YOU SAY TANLINES

217

ARE HERE, OR TANLINES IS HERE.
>: TANLINES IS HERE.

218

>: GOOD QUESTION.
>: GREAT QUESTION.

219

>: I'M SURE THERE IS A
GRAMMATICALLY CORRECT

220

ANSWER, AND I DON'T HAVE IT.

221

>: I THINK IT'S TANLINES--
(she laughs)
>: --HANG ON. IT'S DEFINITELY

222

TANLINES WAS HERE. W-U-Z.
>: WUZ.
>: YEAH, LIKE THE

223

YING YANG TWINS.

224

>: WE WERE GOING TO NAME
OURSELVES THE YING YANG

225

TWINS, BUT THE NAME WAS
ALREADY TAKEN.

226

>: WHO'S THE YING, AND WHO'S
THE YANG, AND

227

YOU DECIDE WHAT THAT MEANS?
>: HMM, I WAS GOING TO ASK

228

YOU TO DEFINE--
>: YING I THINK IS GOOD,
AND YANG MEANS BAD.

229

>: YOU HAD ME AT BAD.
>: YOU'RE YANG.

230

>: I'M BAD.
>: YEAH.

231

>: DO YOU GUYS LIKE BORDELINES,
THAT SONG?

232

>: YEAH, IT'S A GREAT SONG.
>: JUST THINKING OF OTHER

233

LINES SONGS.
>: YEAH, YEAH. IT IS A LINE SONG.

234

>: IT'S ON YOUR MIX. THAT
BARBECUE MIX-- I FOUND

235

YOUR MIX ON FACEBOOK.
>: I LIKE A LOT OF DIFFERENT

236

KINDS OF MUSIC. WE ALL DO.
>: Erin: DO YOU LIKE MUSIC

237

IRONICALLY?
>: I TRY NOT TO.

238

>: GOOD FOR YOU.
>: OH, WE HAVE THIS
THING WHEN WE SAY

239

YOU GET TO A CERTAIN AGE
WHERE THERE'S NO MORE

240

IRONICALLY LIKING MUSIC.
>: YEAH.

241

>: YOU KNOW, THERE'S NO
GUILTY PLEASURE MUSIC.

242

SO IT'S LIKE YOU'RE OLD
ENOUGH YOU JUST LIKE--

243

>: YOU JUST HAVE TO
GROW UP AND LIKE IT.
>: EMBRACE IT.

244

>: RIGHT. LIKE, I LIKE POP COUNTRY,
AND I THINK THAT--
>: SO DO I.

245

>: -- I USED TO THINK IT WAS LIKE
GARBAGE, BUT THE FACT THAT IT

246

IS, BUT I LIKE IT.
>: I MEAN IF IT MAKES YOU HAPPY--

247

>: DO YOU WATCH NASHVILLE?
>: OK, I DID THROUGH SEASON 2.

248

>: THERE'S ONLY 2 SEASONS.
>: OH, THAN YEAH.

249

>: YEAH. (laughs)
I'M TOTALLY CAUGHT UP
WITH NASHVILLE.

250

(Erin and Bryan):
DO YOU WATCH IT?

251

>: I LOVE THAT SHOW.
>: REALLY?
>: WHAT DO YOU LIKE

252

ABOUT IT?
>: WE BOTH WATCH IT. I LOVE IT

253

BECAUSE IT'S ABOUT MUSIC,
BUT IT'S NOT CLOSE ENOUGH

254

TO MY OWN WORLD THAT
I CRINGE ABOUT IT.

255

>: AND CONNIE BRITTON'S HAIR--
>: CONNIE BRITTON...

256

>: --IS LIKE, THOSE HIGHLIGHT
S ARE INSANE.

257

>: YEAH.
>: NO ONE CAN DO A
GLITTER GENE LIKE

258

SHE CAN.
>: DO YOU GUYS
HAVE TANLINES?

259

DO YOU DO MYSTIC TAN, OR DO
YOU DO TANNING BEDS?

260

>: NEVER DONE THAT.
I SHOULD PROBABLY
>: NO, THIS IS AS TAN AS I EVER WILL BE.

261

>: YOU GET PRETTY TANNED.
>: THAT'S PRETTY TANNED
THOUGH.

262

(interposing conversation)

263

>: DO YOU?
>: I DO, I HAVE TO BE
EXPOSED LONGER.

264

>: DO YOU NEVER GO TO A TANNING BED?
>: NO.

265

>: YOU SHOULD JUST DO IT
ONCE TO SEE WHAT IT'S ABOUT.

266

>: YEAH, NO I HEAR YOU.
I'M UP FOR ANYTHING EXCEPT
FOR SKYDIVING.

267

>: WHEN YOU GO INTO--
I'LL NEVER SKY DIVE EITHER--
>: NEVER.

268

>: --IN A FUCKING MILLION YEARS.
>: WHAT IF

269

BERNADETTE PETERS ASKED
YOU TO DO IT?
>: MAYBE.

270

>: YEAH. ERIC, HAVE YOU
ALWAYS SUNG?

271

WERE YOU A SINGER WHEN
YOU WERE YOUNGER?

272

>: UH, I LIKE TO SAY THAT MY FIRST
PERFORMANCE WAS MY BAR MITZVAH.

273

>: WAS IT? DID YOU SING AT
YOUR BAR MITZVAH?
>: WHAT DID YOU SING?

274

>: YEAH.
>: YOU HAVE TO SING.
>: (inaudible)

275

>: OH... RIGHT, RIGHT...

276

>: I REALIZE NOW THAT, THAT
JOKE I'VE BEEN MAKING ONLY

277

WORKS WHEN THE SITUATION'S OBVIOUS.
>: Brian: THAT'S PROBABLY TRUE.

278

>: Erin: THAT'S IT.
>: HOW DID YOU GUYS KNOW--

279

EH, MEET?
>: HOW DID WE KNOW?

280

(interposing conversation)

281

>: HOW DID WE KNOW
THAT HE WAS THE ONE?

282

>: HOW DID YOU KNOW?
>: HOW DID YOU KNOW YOU GUYS

283

LIKED PLAYING TOGETHER?
LIKE, OF COURSE YOU

284

LIKE BEING FRIENDS.
>: YEAH, WE STARTED

285

WRITING MUSIC IN HIS STUDIO.
THE IDEAS KEPT COMING OUT,

286

AND WE WRITTEN A SONG
BEFORE YOU KNEW IT,

287

AND WE TRIED TO KEEP DOING
THAT OVER AND OVER AGAIN.

288

>: DO YOU EVER GET IN FIGHTS?
>: YES.

289

>: DO YOU FIGHT ABOUT NOTES?

290

>: WHAT DO YOU MEAN?
>: LIKE, HIT IT, OR WHATEVER--

291

YOU DIDN'T HIT IT!
>: RIGHT.

292

IF YOU'RE GOING TO HIT A NOTE--
>: DO YOU HAVE

293

ANY NOTES TO BE SPECIFIC HERE C?
>: YEAH.

294

I'VE NEVER GOTTEN MAD ABOUT C.
>: THERE WAS SOME SONGS

295

THAT I WANTED TO PITCH YOU GUYS.
>: OH, YOU WRITE MUSIC TOO?
>: YEAH.

296

I MIGHT HAVE SOME NOTES.
>: Erin: THAT'S YOUR SONG.

297

>: CURTAIN UP, CURTAIN DOWN.

298

AND IT'S JUST ABOUT WHAT YOU
ARE GOING TO DO THAT DAY.

299

>: THAT'S A GREAT NAME.
I MEAN THAT'S A GREAT NAME -

300

THAT'S A GREAT LYRIC.
>: WEATHER OUTSIDE-- YOU KNOW,

301

HOPE THE SUN MOVES CLOSE--
>: A LITTLE WORDY.

302

>: --NO BUT FOR RAIN.
>: ANOTHER ONE IS CALLED

303

FOR RAIN, AND IT'S DEDICATED TO--
>: WELL THEY'RE THE EXPERTS SO
YOU SHOULD BE

304

JUST OPEN TO THEIR CRITICISM.
>: FOR RAIN, THAT'S GOOD.

305

>: UM, I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY
FRIEND, AND THAT COULD BE--

306

>: THAT'S GOOD.
>: --ABOUT BACKSTABBING.

307

>: THAT'S GOOD, PEOPLE LOVE THAT.
>: YEAH.

308

>: HOW DO YOU DESCRIBE WHAT YOU
DO TO YOUR GREAT AUNT?

309

>: I SAY THAT I DO MUSIC.
>: THEN IT'S LIKE, ARE YOU A PIANIST?

310

>: AND I'M LIKE NO - I SAY
ELECTRONIC MUSIC, YOU KNOW.

311

AND SHE'S LIKE, AND YOU MAKE YOUR
LIVING OFF OF THAT, AND I'M LIKE YES.

312

>: (laughs) THAT'S THE FOLLOW-UP?

313

>: YEAH, YEAH, AND THEN LIKE,
YES, AND THEN SHE'S

314

LIKE, OK, THAT'S GREAT.

315

>: DO YOU HAVE AN EASY TIME
LIKE THAT AT WEDDINGS?

316

>: NO, I THINK EVERYONE
KNOWS WHAT I DO AT THIS POINT.

317

>: SO PEOPLE CAN GET YOUR
ALBUMS ON iTunes.

318

>: SURE.
>: "MIXED EMOTIONS"
>: "MIXED EMOTIONS"

319

>: ARE YOU GUYS COMING
OUT WITH ANYTHING--

320

HOW OBNOXIOUS.
I'LL SHUT MY MOUTH.

321

ARE YOU COMING OUT WITH
SOMETHING SOON?

322

>: YEAH, WE HAVE A NEW ALBUM.
>: OOH, WHAT IS IT?

323

>: WE DON'T HAVE A RELEASE DATE,
OR ANYMORE INFORMATION

324

WE CAN GIVE YOU.
>: NO, WE DON'T HAVE
A TITLE YET.

325

(interposing conversation)

326

>: BUT OH, I'M SURE YOU'LL PUT
SOMETHING UP ON TWITTER,

327

AND YOUR TWITTER IS SO GOOD.
>: THANKS.

328

>: IT'S SO FUNNY.
>: EVERYTHING YOU PUT OUT

329

ON THE INTERNET, KEEP DOING IT.

330

>: THANK YOU.
>: DOES THAT SOUND
LIKE YOUR GREAT

331

AUNT--
>: YEAH, REALLY.

332

(interposing conversation)

333

>: (Erin imitates his Aunt) JESSE.
JESSE, I HEARD YOUR MUSIC--

334

>: IS THIS YOUR DJ MOVE?

335

--I HEARD YOUR MUSIC ON A CREDIT
CARD COMMERCIAL.

336

>: THEY UNDERSTAND THAT.

337

>: YEAH, OF COURSE.
>: HAVE YOU DONE THAT YET?

338

HAVE YOU SOLD MUSIC TO
A COMMERCIAL?
>: NO, BUT NOT--

339

>: IT'S BEEN IN SOME MOVIES
THOUGH.
>: YES.

340

>: WE DON'T REALLY, UM--
IT WOULD HAVE TO BE SOMETHING

341

SPECIAL.
>: ROLEX.
>: I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THAT.

342

>: THANKS FOR COMING ON.
>: YACHT CLUB MEMBERSHIPS.

343

>: Erin: YEAH, BEEN REALLY FUN.
>: DINERS CLUB.

344

>: PANERA.
>: THE BREAD PLACE?

345

>: YEAH. THANKS SO MUCH.
>: (inaudible)

346

>: YOU'VE BEEN GREAT SPORTS.
>: YEAH.

347

>: SEA WORLD.
>: I THINK THERE'S
AN ISSUE THERE.

348

>: NO, NO... THAT'S ALL--
I THINK IF YOU GO YOU'LL

349

FEEL DIFFERENTLY, AND YOU'LL
BE LIKE, CAN I DO

350

SHAMU'S SONG.
>: MIGHT.

351

>: WELL THEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT,
BUT THEN CALL ME

352

IF YOU DO, BECAUSE I NEED
TO BE INVOLVED.
>: OK.

353

>: BYE GUYS.
>: BYE. THANK YOU
VERY MUCH.

354

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