To save humanity, a dietician travels to the past. A lot.

Full Credits

Director: Elliot Dickerhoof
Producers: Chuck Armstrong, Charlie Stockman, Elliot Dickerhoof
Writers: Chuck Armstrong & Charlie Stockman
Actors: Chuck Armstrong, Charlie Stockman, Kelly Vrooman
Executive Producer: Darren Miller
DP: Cody Jacobs
Gaffer: Jordan Holtane
AC: Giselle Gonzalez
Sound Mixer: Marcos Castro
Costume Designer: Kate Bergh
Hair and Makeup Artist: Jessica Leigh Schwartz
PA: Elyssa Phillips

Stats & Data

Transcript

- [Narrator] Gadoosh.
(classic rock)
(toilet flushing)
- Oh, you're terrible!
(portal opening)
- Wait!
(gasping)
Stop!
Don't eat that food!
- Who are you?
What are you doing in our house?
- I'm from the future.
I'm here to warn you, don't eat that food.
- Why not?
- The eggs, they're full of cholesterol.
- What?
- Cholesterol it,
it clogs up your arteries.
Eating even just one egg can dramatically
increase your chance of heart attack.
Don't eat eggs!
- Oh, my God.
Thank you.
- You're welcome.
Godspeed.
(dramatic music)
(portal closing)
- Well I guess I better take those eggs.
(portal opening)
- Wait!
Stop!
- [Woman] You're back!
- Yeah, we were wrong about the eggs.
- How?
- Well it turns out there's two types of cholesterol.
There's good cholesterol and bad cholesterol,
and eggs actually have both.
So you can eat eggs but just don't eat the egg yolks.
So stick with the egg whites.
- Yes, thank you.
- Godspeed!
(intense music)
(portal closing)
(portal opening)
Wait!
We were wrong about the eggs.
- Again?
- Yeah.
Yeah, okay so it turns out that the amount of cholesterol
in a food doesn't actually affect how much cholesterol
ends up in your blood.
The eggs are probably fine.
In fact we sort of don't even know what...
cholesterol is.
But the steak!
You can't eat the steak!
- Why not?
- Turns out that red meat increases
your chance of heart attack.
You have to cut out red meat.
So no steak!
- Thank you.
- Godspeed.
(intense music)
- What, no.
No steak, Mister.
- Wait.
(portal opening)
- Wait!
We were wrong about the steak!
It's the toast.
Man was not meant to eat bread.
- What do you mean man was not meant to eat bread?
- Well if you think about it,
human beings should really only be eating
what our paleolithic ancestors ate.
So, therefore, no bread, no toast.
- How do you know what our paleolithic ancestors ate?
- Well, we just have to guess.
Right, I mean we don't have any way of knowing wha-
(portal closing)
(sighing)
(portal opening)
- Woo!
Okay, went back to the paleolithic.
They are...
not
doing well.
I don't know what we were thinking.
If anything we should all be eating a lot more bread.
Geez!
So I guess just um,
ignore everything I've said and exercise.
- Exercise, okay.
- Yeah.
You guys could probably use it.
You've been sitting just sitting here for the last 35 years.
- It's been five minutes.
- Right.
Time travel.
Alright, well,
Godspeed!
(dramatic music)
(portal opening)
Turns out it's genetic.
Doesn't matter whether you exercise or what you eat.
I'm sorry I ruined your meal.
- I need 10 minutes.
Woo!
- Do you want some eggs?
- I'd love some.

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