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Before you ride this 100% not dangerous roller coaster, sheriff Patrick Warburton has a few simple instructions for ya.
Published June 26, 2011 640k views Immortal More Info »
Additional Credits
Additional Credits:
Writer/Director/Editor: Scott Gairdner
Producer: Josh Martin
Production Manager: Jacob Geller
1st AD: Tim Ketchersid
2nd AD: Matt Mazany
Director of Photography: James Codeglia
1st AC / DIT: Ben Moen
Gaffer: Stuart Locke
Grips: Sara Elia, Tyler Condon
Production Designer: Tony Swansey
Art Lead: Colin Blake
Wardrobe: Beckee Gardner
Hair / Makeup: Kat Bardot
Sound: Botown Sound
PAs: Paul Heikens, Alistair Walford, Andrew Grissom, Becca Scheuer, Jordan Martin
VFX: Ghostlight
Sheriff: Patrick Warburton
Ride Attendants: Perry Adam Smith, Erin Pade
Coaster Riders: Skyler James Sandak, Andrew Grissom, Dominique Marsell, Samiyah Swann, Jordan Martin, Jesse Klein, Brian Lane, Brad Schulz
Handicapped Guest: Danny Jelinek
Native American Guide: Joe Billingiere
Mountie: David Love
15,531 Funny Votes
2,845 Die Votes
643,842 Views
Published June 26, 2011

1

♫ (western music) ♫

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(loud crowd noise)

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Cowboy: Howdy, partners.

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Welcome to Zero Gravity Gulch.

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I'm Sheriff of this here roller coaster.

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The roughest, toughest ride in the west,

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but before you hit the dusty trail

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here's some safety tips
you best keep in mind.

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Watch your step when you saddle up.

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Use your hands to buckle your seat belt,

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then pull down on the lap bar.

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Next, reach up and lower
the shoulder harness.

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Then reach up again and
unfold the chin restraint.

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Once your head is secure

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one of our deputies will come by

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and fasten the tooth belts.

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When you reach the
shift supervisor deputy,

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pull up on the orange and green straps.

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Not the red.

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All cowpokes must be between
46-112 inches to ride.

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Guests with disability
should see a ride attendant.

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Who will escort them to Fort Special.

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There the ride will be described to them

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by an authentic Navajo story teller.

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(old west piano playing)

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If your a pregnant
mother, ride all you want.

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Have fun. You're screaming for 2.

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Do be aware that the ride may jostle

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your child's gender.

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All pets should be deposited
in the critter caboose.

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If you or your pet are
sensitive to the following:

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motion sickness, loud or profane noise,

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corrosive liquid, eye danger,

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constant shifts between
extreme hot and cold,

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proximity to bees,

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graphic sexual animatronic
displays, or heights.

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Well, this might not be your rodeo, Bucko.

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Our Zero Gravity Gulch's 16 mile track

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stretches across the US/Canada border,

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so be sure to display your passport

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to the Mounted Officer at the check point.

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The ride will include a brief meal break.

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Your choice of turkey
panini, Greek salad wrap,

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or kids chicken fingers fun pack.

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Do be back on the ride
in exactly 15 minutes

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or you will be left at the rest area.

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If your train is stuck
for more than 7 days,

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please elect a Coaster Chief

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who will hunt and ration food and women.

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Well, looks like it's time for you all

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to mosey on out of here.

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Just keep those few simple rules in mind

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and it should be smooth
sailing to the next station

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where I'll have more instruction for you.

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Until then, you all be safe.

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Oh, and one more thing.

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Have a good time.

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Oh, and one more thing.

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The ride may cause a
big smile on your face

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and spinal trauma and anal leakage.

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(buzzer)

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