Writer/Director/Editor: Scott Gairdner Producer: Josh Martin Production Manager: Jacob Geller 1st AD: Tim Ketchersid 2nd AD: Matt Mazany Director of Photography: James Codeglia 1st AC / DIT: Ben Moen Gaffer: Stuart Locke Grips: Sara Elia, Tyler Condon Production Designer: Tony Swansey Art Lead: Colin Blake Wardrobe: Beckee Gardner Hair / Makeup: Kat Bardot Sound: Botown Sound PAs: Paul Heikens, Alistair Walford, Andrew Grissom, Becca Scheuer, Jordan Martin VFX: Ghostlight Sheriff: Patrick Warburton Ride Attendants: Perry Adam Smith, Erin Pade Coaster Riders: Skyler James Sandak, Andrew Grissom, Dominique Marsell, Samiyah Swann, Jordan Martin, Jesse Klein, Brian Lane, Brad Schulz Handicapped Guest: Danny Jelinek Native American Guide: Joe Billingiere Mountie: David Love
♫ (western music) ♫
(loud crowd noise)
Cowboy: Howdy, partners.
Welcome to Zero Gravity Gulch.
I'm Sheriff of this here roller coaster.
The roughest, toughest ride in the west,
but before you hit the dusty trail
here's some safety tips
you best keep in mind.
Watch your step when you saddle up.
Use your hands to buckle your seat belt,
then pull down on the lap bar.
Next, reach up and lower
the shoulder harness.
Then reach up again and
unfold the chin restraint.
Once your head is secure
one of our deputies will come by
and fasten the tooth belts.
When you reach the
shift supervisor deputy,
pull up on the orange and green straps.
Not the red.
All cowpokes must be between
-112 inches to ride.
Guests with disability
should see a ride attendant.
Who will escort them to Fort Special.
There the ride will be described to them
by an authentic Navajo story teller.
(old west piano playing)
If your a pregnant
mother, ride all you want.
Have fun. You're screaming for 2.
Do be aware that the ride may jostle
your child's gender.
All pets should be deposited
in the critter caboose.
If you or your pet are
sensitive to the following:
motion sickness, loud or profane noise,
corrosive liquid, eye danger,
constant shifts between
extreme hot and cold,
proximity to bees,
graphic sexual animatronic
displays, or heights.
Well, this might not be your rodeo, Bucko.
Our Zero Gravity Gulch's 16 mile track
stretches across the US/Canada border,
so be sure to display your passport
to the Mounted Officer at the check point.
The ride will include a brief meal break.
Your choice of turkey
panini, Greek salad wrap,
or kids chicken fingers fun pack.
Do be back on the ride
in exactly 15 minutes
or you will be left at the rest area.
If your train is stuck
for more than 7 days,
please elect a Coaster Chief
who will hunt and ration food and women.
Well, looks like it's time for you all
to mosey on out of here.
Just keep those few simple rules in mind
and it should be smooth
sailing to the next station
where I'll have more instruction for you.
Until then, you all be safe.
Oh, and one more thing.
Have a good time.
Oh, and one more thing.
The ride may cause a
big smile on your face
and spinal trauma and anal leakage.