A popular children's cereal is killing by the thousands and only CONSUMER WATCH has the gumption to ask the tough questions!
- May 12, 2016
- 4k Views
May 12, 2016
Jillian Dunn: $12 million dollars.
Beau Henry: 4,000 children dead.
Jillian Dunn: It's this unassuming ad
campaign for popular cereal Kill-X.
♪ Kill-X is not a cereal ♪
♪ It's rat poison ♪
♪ So please stop feeding it to your kids ♪
♪ It's for killing rats ♪
[Male #1]: Not for human consumpt... sorry.
Not for human consumption.
Usually this part is said faster,
but we couldn't risk it.
Jillian Dunn: Perhaps it's the cereal's edgy,
anti-ad campaign, campaign,
Jillian Dunn: and unique solution packaging
that's won this brand so many younger fans,
Jillian Dunn: but most mothers and some
fathers see the product in a different--
-[Male #2]: Cereal...
it's apart of a complete breakfast--
--at least that's what they say.
What they don't say is that
you're going to come home, and
find your son face down
in a bowl of his own guts. [sighs]
Jillian Dunn: I'm going to stop you there.
Jillian Dunn: So you said he had the
product for breakfast that morning?
Jillian Dunn: And you, came home to find him.
[deep sigh] Yeah.
Jillian Dunn: So you were out the previous night?
Jillian Dunn: Perhaps with a lady
that wasn't your son's mother.
We've hit a bit of a rough patch.
I don't see what your point is--
Jillian Dunn: Oh no point sir.
Jillian Dunn: Only that one sin deserves another.
Jillian Dunn: To get the full story,
I walked into the lion's den and sat down with
Jillian Dunn: Kill-X's press secretary Agatha Bumfeld
to discuss what's next for Kill-X.
Okay, first of all, I would like
to state for the umpteenth time
that Kill-X is not a children's cereal.
It's a rat poison,
and we don't understand where this--
Jillian Dunn: Sorry to cut you off,
but I was listening closely, because
Jillian Dunn: we'd heard that Kill-X maybe
using subliminal messaging
Jillian Dunn: to infiltrate children's mind waves.
Jillian Dunn: My team has already told me that
you just brain flashed the phrase teen time.
Jillian Dunn: How do you defend yourself?
I asked if I could state
something for the umpteenth time?
-Yes, there it is again.
Jillian Dunn: While Ms. Bumfeld proved to
be as unapologetic as one may
Jillian Dunn: expect from a company who's
bottom line relies on dead children,
Jillian Dunn: there is a ray of hope on the horizon.
Jillian Dunn: Kind of like this.
Is the interview over?
Jillian Dunn: That's right.
Jillian Dunn: The FDA has banned Kill-X from human
consumption indefinitely, 25 years ago.
That's what I've been saying.
Jillian Dunn: That's not to say that children
can't find the sumptuous treat
Jillian Dunn: in any available hardware store.
Jillian Dunn: Usually in the pest control aisle.
Jillian Dunn: Ask a clerk. They'll be able to help you.
Jillian Dunn: It's currently being sold as,
get this, snail poison--
[Agatha]: Rat poison!
Jillian Dunn: I've been Céline Dion,
but not the one you're thinking of.
Beau Henry: And I'm Zach Zorba, back-up reporter.
Beau Henry: Remember me from earlier?
Jillian Dunn: And this has been, Consumer Watch.
Jillian Dunn: Oh jinx, you owe me a Coke.
Beau Henry: Gosh dang-it.
[Male #3]: Turn Coat.
-To discuss what's next for Kill-X.
[Male #4]: Okay.