Brostitute with Tim Roth

Uploader

Tim Roth

Writer

Seth Morris

Writer

Owen Burke

Director & Editor

Matt and Oz

Executive Producer

Funny Or Die

Make Up

Shauna O'Toole

Cam Op

Brian Mulchy

Producer

Christin Trogan

Additional Credits [+]

Old embed code (only works with browsers that support Adobe Flash)

WEBVTT 00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:17.000 <v Seth Morris> Lakers, uh, Vikings, uh, I think, I think Steelers? I, I don't even actually like sports, to be honest. I have to Google half this sh*t before I put it on. 00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:21.000 <v Seth Morris> These are my work costumes. You know? I mean, I'll be whatever you want me to be. 00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:36.000 <v James Pumphrey> Some people are like, scientists. And some people are even doctors. You know? But, I was born to bro out. 00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:44.000 <v Tim Roth> I'm not a pimp, per se. Uh, a pimp would sell sex. I, I broker friendship. It's a commodity just like anything else. You know? 00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:56.000 <v Tim Roth> I don't care Sergio. I told you, I don't care. You eat the fu**ing nachos, all right? I don't care if there's cheese on them. Untuck your shirt. And pop your collar. 00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:57.000 <v Seth Morris> Do I look alright, Jerry? 00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:58.000 <v Tim Roth> Oh, fu*k off. 00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:02.000 <v Tim Roth> On you go. 00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:23.000 <v Tim Roth> Your typical bro out involves your standard guy stuff. You know? Watching sports on the telly. Um, playing video games. Fart play. Smoking a little weed. That's a hundred and fifty dollars for the night. That's all in, that's the package. That's the starter package, and then it goes up from there, really. 00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:32.000 <v Seth Morris> You know, it's a job. Is this what I thought I'd do with my life? No. Could I see myself doing something differently? At this point, I don't know. 00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:34.000 <v Seth Morris> What's up man? 00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:35.000 <v Man On Street> What's up? 00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:36.000 <v Seth Morris> How you doing? 00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:37.000 <v Man On Street> Doing good. You want to hang out? 00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:38.000 <v Seth Morris> You a cop? 00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:39.000 <v Man On Street> Nah, man. 00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:50.000 <v James Pumphrey> I'm not the kind of guy who can have a nine to five. I love drinking beer. I love watching action movies and stuff, so, I mean, you know, it's good money. Beats having a real job. 00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:54.000 <v James Pumphrey> And I had this other chick with my, with my stink and pinkin' going on over here. 00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:59.000 <v Tim Roth> I mean, sure, it can be dangerous. Any job can be. [Police Sirens] 00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:05.000 <v Seth Morris> I've blown out this shoulder a couple times from high fiveing. Uh, both knees from hacky sacking. I get a lot of hangovers. 00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:14.000 <v James Pumphrey> I broke my nose once. I was doing a keg stand, and I was covered in soap, and don't ask, but... I get a lot of hangovers. 00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:23.000 <v Seth Morris> Looks like I am going to dollar taco night. At Big Wayne's. [Whispering] Fu*k. [End Whisper] Make some money. 00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:30.000 [Music Playing] 00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:36.000 <v James Pumphrey> A wise man once said don't do something to make money. Do something that you love, and then you'll make money. 00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:38.000 <v Tim Roth> Dude, talk to me. You talk to me. He doesn't want to pay you? 00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:42.000 <v Seth Morris> I know I'm getting old. I know it's a little pathetic when I hang out with these guys. 00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:43.000 <v Tim Roth> [Yelling] Fu**ing money! 00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:44.000 <v James Pumphrey> Beat his a*s Jerry. Relax. Ugh. 00:02:46.000 --> 00:02:51.000 <v Tim Roth> [Yelling] I told you to stay in a fu**ing [??]! 00:02:51.000 --> 00:02:53.000 <v Tim Roth> It, it's an outrage. That it, it should be illegal. 00:02:53.000 --> 00:03:02.000 <v Seth Morris> I don't know what the future holds. You know? I'd love to be a dad. I'd love to get married. Love to, you know, not have roommates. Whatever. 00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:08.000 <v James Pumphrey> Hey, dude! You wanna play Madden? Whatever, dude. 00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:15.000 [Music Playing] 00:03:15.000 --> 00:03:16.000 <v Daniel Cirilo> It's this constant, endless fight. 00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:22.000 <v Seth Morris> I'm sorry, bro. I, I gotta charge you extra if you bi*ch about your lady. Sorry. 00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:27.000 <v Daniel Cirilo> Oh, yeah. Um, yeah. That's fine.