Written and Starring Dylan Booth David Brown Anais Fairweather Yesel Manrique Mark Schroeder Edited by David Brown Yesel Manrique Mesothelioma Director/Sound Private Street Boder Brothers Director/DP Nic Stanich Sound Bo Sundberg Makeup Jessica Leigh Schwartz Charles Wills Booty Call Director - Marvin Bryan Lemus Director of Photography - Erik Schneider Sound - Chris Bennet for BoTown Sound Pizza Prank Director/Sound - Private Street Crazy Cork Director - Marvin Bryan Lemus Director of Photography - Erik Schneider Sound - Chris Bennet For BoTown Sound Executive Producer - Matt Mazany Special Thanks - Ryan Moulton
[BOOK CLOSING] Hi, I'm Lawyer Dan.
People with Mesothelioma have a lot of
questions, how did I get this disease?
What are my treatment options?
And what the hell is Mesothelioma?
It's a scary word, isn't it?
I'll say it one more time, Misofeliaromo.
Look, I'm not a doctor guy,
I'm a lawyer guy.
I don't have patients.
I have clients.
And I don't wear a doctor's jacket,
I wear a lawyer's suit.
Actually, it's a bunch of different suits.
I can't cure you of your messistealihoma,
I can get you immediate compensation now.
In the past,
I've gotten my clients fast cash for
ailments such as Medical Malpractice,
Avian Bird Flu, Helium Addiction,
Exploding Eye Syndrome, Infant Death,
and even Regular Adult Death.
So, yeah, I think I can handle
a little case of massive hemo-goblin.
So, pick up the phone now, and call my law
offices located on Mesofili Road, a bit
outside Pamona and talk to my sister, Thea
Ramona about your case of Mesohornyhomo.
Look, I get it.
It's not easy living with Mesosuperoma.
So please, call me now, and
let me get to work getting you immediate
compensation for your Miley Cyrus boner.
> We've been hit.
We should not have spelled come C-U-M,
she is super creeped out.
> Take evasive action!
[BUTTON PRESSED] [BEEP]
> She LOLed, she bought it,
we are back in the game!
How should we proceed sir?
> Requesting council.
Gentlemen, do we continue
with Operation Booty Call?
> I felt bad about this the entire time.
> Major Morals.
> I have said from the beginning that
we should wait until we're married to
> Mm, that settles it.
Operation Booty Call is off the table.
Lieutenant, I want you to send
something nice and sweet.
Now gentlemen, I know we haven't
seen booty in quite some time,
but as God as my witness,
we will see that ass again.
why did you send a dick pic?
> Desperate times call for
> Oh, you are court marshaled!
> I'm a God damn hero!
I'm gonna see booty.
> [LAUGH] Yes!
> [SOUND] Yeah, yeah.
> You are a god damn genius, [KISS].
> No butt stuff.
Not worth it.
[PHONE THROWN] Back to sleep.
> Right Time.
Our pizza is out of this world.
That's the best damn
commercial I've ever seen.
[CLAPS] Hey, let's celebrate.
> Are you kidding me?
> No way.
> Where did you get that?
That was crazy.
> Whoa hey.
> Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
> It's alive!
Oh, my God, it's burning.
Oh, fuck, it's burning my hand, help me!
[POP SOUND] No.
> Oh, no, oh, [SOUND]
> He's dead, and that cork killed him.
> You killed our friend,
you son of a bitch!
Where'd it go?
> [DOOR KNOCK] What?
> I'll get it.
> Guys, I don't see it.
I have to answer it.
[PHONE RINGING] I have to.
I have to.
Can I speak to Mark please?
> Mark, it's for you.
> Why'd you give him the phone?
> He said, I want to talk to Mark.
> Why the fuck did you give the phone?
> I couldn't help it.
> I'm gonna go get help.
I'm gonna go get sheriff [INAUDIBLE]
> No we don't [INAUDIBLE] [SOUND] aah!
Dylan, you're back!
> Don't let a cork screw up your night.
[NOISE] Use Handre's new
screw top champagne.
Handres we won't kill your party.
> [LAUGH] Wow, congratulations.
That was the best damn
commercial I've ever seen.
Hey, let's celebrate.