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Jonathan loves three things - top knots, Pride Week and Game of Thrones.
Published June 09, 2014 130k views Immortal More Info »
Additional Credits
Additional Credits:
Starring Jonathan Van Ness
Featuring: ​Sally Brooks
Directed by Erin Gibson
Written by Erin Gibson and Jeffery Self
Producer Matt Mazany and Ross Buran
DP - Cristina Dunlop
Editor - Leann Bowen
Assistant Editor - Kathria Tizon
Camera Operator - Matt Sweeny
Sound Mixer - Ryan Kaiser
Production Designer - Flower Cole

HEY GIRL DID YOU WATCH
GAME OF THRONES LAST NIGHT?
HEY GIRL I WATCHED THE
TONY AWARDS LAST NIGHT.
OH SHIT GIRL IT'S ABOUT TO BE ON
YEAH IT IS.
[GAY OF THRONES THEME MUSIC]
SO FIRST WE HAD JON SNOW,
AND TUBBY LOVEY
HAVING A LITTLE CONVO,
AND TUBBY LOVEY IS ALL
LIKE, JON SNOW, SINCE WE'RE
GOING TO DIE TONIGHT
COULD YOU JUST TELL ME WHAT
IT'S LIKE TO GET A LITTLE NASTY?
SO JON SNOW IS TRYING
TO TELL TUBBY LOVEY
ABOUT IT BUT HE'S TOTALLY
STRUGS TO DO IT.
WHO'S THIS PURSE?
THIS WHOLE OTHER PURSE.
YOU'RE RIGHT TOPPING MAN.
THEY'RE RIGHT TOPPING YOU.
FOR A LITTLE WHILE YOU'RE
MORE THAN JUST
YOU. BROTHER I'M NO
BLEEDING POET.
SO WHEN IT COMES TO
MATTERS BEING HARD CORE
GAME OF THRONES CAN
TOTALLY DO THAT, BUT
THEN WHEN IT COMES
TO BEING A LITTLE BIT
MORE LIKE SOFT TENDER
KISSES THEY TOTALLY
GET A LITTLE PINK
IN THE CHEEKS.
WHEN I WAS AT HEADWIG
I GOT TO MAKE OUT
WITH NEAL PATRICK
HARRIS, AND MY CHEEKS
WERE PINK FOR DAYS.
I'M SO JELLY, YOU GOT
TO MAKE OUT WITH NPH?
WELL I DIDN'T REALLY,
BUT I'M TELLING
EVERYBODY THAT I DID.
AND THEN YOU SEE ONE
OF THOSE MANNEQUIN HEADS
THAT I LEARNED HOW TO
DO A PERM ON, AND
BITCH SHE WAS WORKIN'.
ALL THE WILD THE GINGER
WIDLY WILL NOT
SHUT UP ABOUT SEXING
WITH A FREAKING BEAR.
FANGS WERE SHARP. SHE
KNEW HOW TO USE THEM.
WHICH AT FIRST I THOUGHT
HE WAS TALKING
ABOUT DOING IT WITH A BIG
HAIRY QUEEN, BUT
REALLY HE WAS TALKING
ABOUT DOING IT WITH
AN ACTUAL BEAR.
LIKE A BROWN BEAR OR A
KODIAK, OR LIKE A WINTERFELL BEAR
OF SORTS.
AND THEN JON WHO'S LIKE
NONE OF YA'LL BETTER
TOUCH JON SNOW.
THAT BITCH IS MINE.
ANYONE ELSE TRIES
TO KILL HIM,
I'LL HAVE A (INAUDIBLE).
MEANWHILE, LEA REMINI
COMES TO THE GATE ONLY
TO BE HIDDEN IN THE
CASTLE BLACK WALKIN FRIDGE.
BUT THEN BEAUTY SCHOOL
PRACTICE DOLLY HEAD
COMES OUT OF HER WORG
AND SHE'S ALL LIKE
GIRLS, YOU BETTER GET
READY TO DANCE.
IT'S TIME.
AND THEN ISH GETS
TURNED UP, AND SO MUCH HAPPENS.
TUBBY LOVEY GIVES A PEP
TALK TO SCARE JOE JONAS.
THERE'S AN EVIL
SNUFFLEUPAGUS, AND A
REALLY BIG GIANT.
THEY'RE GIVING ME 100%
DIRTY MYSTERIOUS CIRQUE
DU SOLEIL.
GIRL, IT'S RAINING ARROWS.
THEY'RE THROWING
ROCKS LIKE CAVE MEN.
GINGER RAGE GOES FULL
EN FUEGO, AND THEN
THEY'RE DANGLING THESE
ARCHERS OVER THE EDGE,
THEY'RE TOTALLY
DEFYING GRAVITY.
(LADY): (SINGING) I'M FLYING
HIGH, DEFYING GRAVITY.
ACTUALLY GIRL I'M NOT
SURE I'M FEELING THAT.
IT'S KINDA HARD FOR ME
TO HEAR SINCE YOU'RE
NOT GREEN.
TOTES UNDERSTAND.
ANYWAY, IT'S A MOTHERFUCKIN' MELEE.
EVERYONE IS SO MUDDY,
I WAS LIKE, I CANNOT
SEE WHO IS WINNING.
AND THEN FINDING
FORRESTER SEAN CONNERY
HIDES, AND THEN LEA
REMINI IS LIKE, BITCH
WHAT ARE YOU DOING
IN MY WALK IN FRIDGE.
AND THEN GIANT MAURICE
SENDAK KENNY RODERS IS
LIKE EXCUSE ME, HOUSEKEEPING.
IN THEN TUBBY LOVEY
TOLD BABY TOM HANKS
GET RICH OR DIE TRYING.
EVERYONE IS GIVING US
LONG KISS GOOD NIGHT
GEENA DAVIS.
SAM LITERALLY LETS THE
DOGS OUT, AND THEN
ALABASTER STEEL AND
JON SNOW MEET EYES.
THEY HAVE A FULL ON
BRAWL, BUT THEN JON
SNOW PUTS THE FREAKIN'
HAMMER THROUGH THE TOP OF HIS
HEAD, HE TURNS AROUND
AND THEN THERE IS DOWNTOWN.
THEY HAVE A MOMENT,
AND I'M LIKE HOLY SHIT,
THROUGH ALL THE RAIN
THEY'RE TOTALLY ABOUT TO
REKINDLE BECAUSE THEY
WERE LIKE SOFT IN THE
EYE, MEANWHILE SHE GETS
THE FUCKIN' ARROW THROUGH
THE BACK OF HER BABY
GINGER HEART. THEY EMBRACE,
IT'S SO SAD, AND THAT
WHOLE TIME I WAS LIKE I WAS SO
READY TO LET YOU GO
DOWN BECAUSE YOU WERE
BEING KIND OF A BITCH.
I'M KIND OF OVER YOU.
BUT THEN I REALIZED THAT
I WAS NOT READY
TO LET HER GO AT ALL...
YOU KNOW (INAUDIBLE)...
JON SNOW.
SHE'S GIVING ME SO MUCH
ROSEY LIKE GOLDNESS,
AND HER DEATH IS SEEMS
LIKE, IS THERE ANY OTHER REASON FOR
LIGHTING THIS RIGHT
NOW IS SO PERFECT.
I SORELY MISSED
(SINGING) THEY WILL
KEEP IT CLOSE
AND RAIN WILL MAKE
THE FLOWERS
IS THAT, THAT ANNE
HATHAWAY SOLO?
ARE YOU OK?
OH I DIED.
SO THEN JON SNOW IS
GETTING READY TO
GO ON HIS LITTLE VOYAGE
AND HE WAS SAYING
BYE TO TUBBY LOVEY
BUT HE WAS ALL LIKE, YOU KNOW
WHAT, YOU MADE ME
THAT MUCH STRONGER,
YOU MADE ME WORK
A LITTLE BIT HARDER,
YOU MADE ME THAT
MUCH WISER,
SO THANKS FOR MAKING
ME A FIGHTER.
- CHRISTINA AGUILERA
- OH.
I KNEW IT WAS FAMILIAR.
NOT LIKE CHRISTINA
AGUILERA, MOTHER OF
DRAGONS, LIKE ACTUAL
CHRISTINA AGUILERA.
THEY JUST LOOK A LIKE.
OH.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT
YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.
I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU
THE FIERCEST TOP KNOT.
OK.
(WHIPPING CLUSTER OF SALON SOUNDS)
YES, MAMA WE'RE GIVING FULL
KHAL DROGO REALNESS.
(SINGS) WHERE ARE...
MY DRAGONS.
OK, JONATHAN WE REALLY
GOT TO START CLOSING
ON TIME BECAUSE I'M
ALREADY LATE TO
DEANDRE'S GAME NIGHT.
(STAMMERS) WH-- YOU GUYS
WHATEVER YOU'RE DOING
IS MAKES LITERALLY NO SENSE.
I DON'T...

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