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Dean Norris (Hank from Breaking Bad) is sick of everyone asking him about how Breaking Bad ends.
Published August 26, 2013 840k views Immortal More Info »
Additional Credits
Additional Credits:
Starring: Dean Norris
Featuring: Rebecca Zamolo
Writer: Dan Klein
Director/Editor: Jack Bishop and Justin Nijm
Producer: Betsy Koch
Producer: Katy Walker
DP: Brian Lane
Gaffer: Aaron Ulrich
Hair/Makeup: Jennifer Osborne
Sound: Ryan Kaiser
PA: Josh Rimmey

1

♫ (melodious music) ♫

2

(clicking sound)

3

Dean: All right, Internet.

4

I'm fed up with everyone bothering me
about, "How's Breaking Bad going to end?"

5

"How's Breaking Bad going to end?"

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so I'm going to tell you
right here, right now.

7

This is how it ends.

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I'm going to read it
for you, the last scene

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of the series finale of Breaking Bad.

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♫ (Breaking Bad theme) ♫

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"Hank Wins,"

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written by me, Dean Norris.

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(exhales)

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Exterior.

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(whooshing sound)

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♫ (ominous music) ♫
New Mexico.

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Hank has caught Walt.

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Walt cries like a little baby bitch.

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Walt: Great job arresting me, Hank.

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I was a stupid idiot to
think I can defeat you.

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You're the best cop there ever is.

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And the strongest one too.

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Hank: (laughs) Yeah.

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It was the minerals I was buying.

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Some of them were magical,

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and they turned me into a superhero.

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They also made me go reverse bald.

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Dean: Hank removes a bald cap and
reveals a luxurious head of hair.

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Walt: Wow.

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That's awesome.

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You are a hero.

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I'm a loser.

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Skyler loves you more than she loves me.

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Goodbye forever.

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(gun cocking sound)

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(gun shot) (thud)

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Hank: (laughs)

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(car honking) (whistles)

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♫ (upbeat music) ♫

40

Dean: We see a babe in a
sexy dress walk up to Hank.

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♫ (upbeat music) ♫

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Babe: Ooh, you're so sexy.

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I want to have your babies, but only
after we have sex, like, 500 times.

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(phone ringing)

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Dean: Hank checks his cellphone.

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There is a message from his wife.

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Marie: You can sex anyone you want.

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You da king.

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Also, you are Walt Jr.'s
dad now, for reals.

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Hank: (laughs)

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Dean: The babe and Hank kiss a lot.

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It's awesome.

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(laughs)

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Wow, that's really good writing.

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♫ (ominous music) ♫ Hank lifts his
talking skateboard, Wheelie, into frame.

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Hank: Walter White's dead, baby.

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Wheelie: Awesome, dude.

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Now we have a new mission.

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There is, like, a crazy
alien drug lord on Mars,

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and they need a superhero
DEA agent to stop him.

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Hank: I gotta "hankering" for some action.

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Babe: (laughs)

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♫ (soaring music) ♫

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Dean: Hank and Wheelie ride off to Mars,
leaving awesome flames in their path.

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(fire whooshing sound)

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♫ (soaring music) ♫

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As you can see, it's pretty, it's pretty
open for the new Hank spinoff show,

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"Mineral Man."

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(knocking sound)

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♫ (soft music) ♫

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Vince: Uh, hey Dean?

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It's me, Vince Gilligan,

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the boss of Breaking Bad.

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I just read your final episode script,

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and I just got to say it's
the best script I ever read.

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Hank: (exhales)

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Vince: In fact, it's so good

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I'm quitting show business.

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Hank: (laughs)

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Vince: Thank you.

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Sorry to bother you.

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♫ (soft music) ♫

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(door closing)

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Dean: The end.

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That last thing was
part of the script too.

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I wrote that.

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(knocking on door)

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Male: Dean, we need you on set
for another toilet shot, OK?

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Don't bring any pants, and hurry up!

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(opens zipper)

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(exhales) (clicking sound)

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