This song is very personal for me. I've never been able to eat anything that... more »

Full Credits


Verse 1

I'm from Alabama yeah you know where that is
I was having dinner with the wife and the kids
Too many biscuits I was bursting at the seam
But then i saw dessert - apple pie and ice cream

I had to take a shit, there was nothing else to do        
because I had seconds, now I'm doing number two   
I need to unload when I have 'a la mode'       
And all that pot roast made a lot of compost

yes it did       
man, I had to take a shit

Verse 2

For lunch I had a salad, spinach and beets.
orange juice for breakfast and cream of wheat
I'm trying to be healthy so I'm eating lighter
it gives you that feeling of - Too much fiber           

I had to take a shit, and I couldn't prevent
Everyone could hear my southern accident       
I ran down the hall as my belt expanded           
I got to the stall, but the leather was branded

Yes it was   


When I'm facing east at the rising sun
The weather vane points the other direction
It's only my business if I made a bad smell
That's why I'm in favor of 'Don't Ask Don't Tell'

Verse 3

It comes in all types any time around the clock
soft like a mayflower, hard as plymouth rock       
So I went to the doctor feeling like a fool
He sat me on a chair and - asked me for my stool   

I had to take a shit, it was out of my power
the bull kept going for 2.7 hours
All that Mexican produced a large specimen
It was so vast you could see into the past
If I put it into words it would be a strong statement
I made a big deposit so they waved the copayment

Yes they did
Man... I had to take a shit