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Published July 11, 2014 120k views More Info »
Additional Credits
Additional Credits:
Cast
starring Pat O'Brien & Dink O'Neal
Crew
Director/Writer- Alex Richanbach
Writer- Jack Allison
Executive Producer- Alex Richanbach
Producer- Rachel Goldenberg, Jason Carden
Editor- Chris Poole
DP- Aaron Ulrich
Operator- Matt Sweeney
Sound- Ben Forman
Makeup- Emily Rae
PA- Eleanor Winkler

1

(opening show music plays)

2

>: SO MR. GILBERT, WHAT'S NEW?
ANYTHING INTERESTING

3

GOING ON?

4

>: NOPE (laughs).

5

>: (laughs)

6

>: NOTHING. JUST HANGING OUT.

7

(both laugh)

8

>: I'M-I'M TRYING TO GET
LEBRON JAMES TO COME BACK

9

TO CLEVELAND. I'VE BEEN
EXTREMELY FOCUSED ON THAT.

10

YOU KNOW THAT'S THE FIRST
TIME I'VE LAUGHED IN MONTHS.

11

>: SO WHAT DO YOU THINKS
BEEN THE BIGGEST HOLD UP IN

12

CONVINCING LEBRON TO COME
BACK TO CLEVELAND?

13

>: I DON'T KNOW.
UH, MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH

14

THAT LETTER I WROTE HIM.

15

>: YEAH, YOU'RE REFERRING TO UH,
WHAT I THOUGHT WAS

16

OUTRAGEOUS AND OFFENSIVE.

17

A LETTER YOU WROTE IN 2010
REFERRING TO LEBRON JAMES,

18

AS A HEARTLESS COWARD.

19

>: THAT WAS THE LETTER.
THAT WOULD BE IT, YES.

20

>: SO DAN, THE QUESTION ON
EVERYBODY'S MIND IS WILL

21

YOU APOLOGIZE?

22

>: WELL, I'VE BEEN GIVING THAT
A LOT OF THOUGHT OVER THE PAST

23

FEW WEEKS, AND I THINK I'VE
COME TO A DECISION.

24

>: AND WHAT IS
THAT DECISION?

25

>: I THINK IT'S IMPORTANT
FOR ME TO...

26

FIRST DISCUSS WHY I WROTE
THE LETTER IN COMIC SANS.

27

>: I... I DON'T THINK
THAT'S IMPORTANT.

28

>: THE REASON WHY I CHOSE
COMIC SANS WAS BECAUSE

29

THE LETTER WAS INTENDED TO
BE HUMOROUS. I MEAN WE WERE

30

SUPPOSED TO SHOW THAT THE
LETTER WAS LIKE A HILARIOUS

31

NEWSPAPER, CARTOON STRIP.

32

LIKE CATHY. YOU KNOW... (screams)

33

>: NOT ONLY DID YOU CALL
LEBRON A COWARD BUT YOU

34

PERSONALLY GUARANTEED THAT
THE CLEVELAND CAVALIERS

35

WOULD WIN A CHAMPIONSHIP BEFORE,
QUOTING, THAT SELF

36

TITLED, FORMER KING DOES.

37

NOW LEBRON HAS WON
2 CHAMPIONSHIPS. THE CAVS

38

HAVEN'T EVEN BEEN IN THE
PLAYOFFS SINCE HE LEFT.

39

>: THAT'S NOT A QUESTION.
>: YOU ALSO REFERRED TO HIM

40

AS DISLOYAL, A BETRAYER,
AND HEARTLESS.

41

I MEAN, THERE'S A LINE HERE,
SOME PEOPLE THINK

42

THEY SHOULD GO TO HEAVEN,
BUT NOT HAVE TO DIE TO GET

43

THERE. THAT'S (bleep) CREEPY.

44

>: I AM THE BIGGER MAN,
AND IT TAKES A BIGGER MAN

45

IN THIS SITUATION.
I MEAN, I AM-- WELL, NOT LITERALLY.

46

LEBRON'S LIKE A GIANT.
I'M WHAT 5'8" ON A GOOD DAY,

47

BUT I'M A BIGGER MAN THAN
AN EGOTISTICAL COWARD WHO

48

TURNS HIS BACK ON THE
TOWN HE GREW UP IN.

49

>: THIS IS NOT MUCH OF
AN APOLOGY SIR.

50

>: WHAT ABOUT HIS APOLOGY? HUH?
I HAVEN'T HEARD

51

HIS APOLOGY YET.

52

>: AND THAT WOULD BE FOR--
>: FOR ALL THE

53

CHAMPIONSHIPS HE WON.

54

>: ALRIGHT, LET'S WRAP
THIS THING UP, OK.

55

>: (stammers) RE-RELAX.
JUST HAVE A SEAT.

56

>: WAIT A MINUTE, YOU DON'T
TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

57

ALRIGHT. THAT'S HOW
IT WORKS HERE.

58

>: ALRIGHT, I-I'M, PREPARED TO
APOLOGIZE TO LEBRON JAMES.

59

LEBRON, I'M SORRY THAT
YOU'RE SUCH A COWARD. TRAITOR--

60

(stammers) YOU-YOU TURNED YOUR BACK
ON ME, AND THAT YOU'RE A
BENEDICT ARNOLD--

61

>: PARDON ME FOR A MINUTE.
>: SURE.

62

>: LEBRON, STAY IN MIAMI,
OR COME TO LOS ANGELES.

63

IT'S GREAT OUT HERE.

64

>: FACE ME LIKE A MAN, JUDAS.

65

>: THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
COMING UP NEXT WEEK ON THE

66

SHOW, DONALD STERLING OPENS
UP TO ME. I'M PAT O'BRIEN.

67

THANKS FOR WATCHING.

68

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