Aurora: Amy Albert Phillip: Nick Cobb Ariel: Kat Nelson Eric: Ross Buran Belle: Jessica Carter Ramsey Beast: Michael Murphy Snow: Melissa O’Brien Prince: Kristian Jenkins Writer/Director: Sean Boring Producer: Katie Barreira Assistant Director: Nick Logsdon Editor: Adam Rose-Levy DP: Adam Rose-Levy 1st AC: Brodin Plett Gaffer: Tanner Hall Sound: Johnny Kukral Hair/Makeup: Rebecca Corona Graphic Designer: Damon Chin Special Thanks: Lindsay Kerns, Michelle Fox, Rachel Goldenberg, Juliet Seniff, Andy Bush, Jack Allison, Lisa Lumar, Aaron Ulrich and Chris Singel
Ariel: We really don't
have a lot in common.
Eric: (laughs) We should have dated for
more than 3 days before we got married.
Ariel: It was definitely a whirlwind.
One minute I'm learning
about snarfblats from Scuttle
and then I saved Eric from drowning
and then I totally made
out with his statue
and then I twerked with the turtles
while the trout rocked it out
and the blackfish, she sings and then I-
Eric: I should be clear, she did not
talk for most of the time we dated.
Phillip: I thought she slept before,
she hit 40 she naps constantly.
My balls are bluer than Merryweather.
Aurora: You know, Maleficent
was right about one thing.
My life would end due to a little
prick just not one on a spinning wheel.
Beast: I come to bed
every night, you know,
trying to put her service to the test
and she's got her nose buried in
her thousandth book for the week.
Belle: There was a bit of false
advertising with the name Beast.
Snow: (singing) I'm wishing for
the one I love, to put down,
Ariel: Your hair today looks so pretty.
That dinglehopper you've been using
is doing wonders with your hair.
Eric: Oh Eric, you know that word is fork.
I've been a human for 8 years and
yet I can't seem to remember that.
Phillip: I'll own up to that,
I don't have a huge dick-
Aurora: I'm not talking about that.
Phillip: But I dress like
the shit, I'm a good provider
and I'm a fucking prince.
Prince: I just don't see why leaving
the toilet seat up is such a big deal.
Snow: Thanks to your pubic
hair all over the place,
the bowl has a thicker beard than Bashful.
Prince: Oh come on.
Beast: How much more effort does it
take to put a dish in the dishwasher
instead of letting it
soak in the sink, huh?
Belle: Oh, we live in an enchanted castle.
The last time I put something in the
dishwasher it told me to go fork myself.
Ariel: Well Sebastian never liked tyou.
Eric: Yeah, when's the
last time you saw him?
You haven't, he was fucking delicious.
Phillip: Do you know how much
money it takes to satisfy her?
The bed that I had to buy?
Beast: If it doesn't have eyes
you can put it in the dishwasher.
Belle: (shouts) They don't all have eyes.
Beast: If it doesn't sing a song,
if it doesn't sing a fucking song-
Belle: (shouts) Well
some of them sing songs!
Beast: (shouts) You can
put it in the dishwasher!
Ariel: Yeah, go to hell Eric.
Eric: Okay, you better watch it hun
or I'm going to throw your ass
out on the, what's that word?
Oh yeah, street.