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"How to Train Your Dragon 2" is getting a new gay character! Plus, being a wedding... more »
Published May 28, 2014 34k views More Info »
Additional Credits
Additional Credits:
Starring Erin Gibson & Bryan Safi
Written by Erin Gibson & Bryan Safi
Camera Op: Cristina Dunlap
Editor: Ian Skalski
Camera Op: Matt Sweeney
Art: Tricia Robertson
Follow Erin & Bryan on Twitter
Erin:
http://www.twitter.com/gibblertron
Bryan:
http://www.twitter.com/bryansafi

1

(ERIN): THIS IS

2

(ERIN AND BRYAN TOGETHER): THROWING SHADE.

3

(BRYAN): WHERE FEMINASTY ERIN GIBSON,

4

(ERIN): AND HOMOSENSUAL BRYAN SAFI,

5

(BRYAN): TAKE A LOOK AT THE HEADLINES
AND POLITICS,

6

(ERIN): AND POP CULTURE,

7

(BRYAN) AND TREAT THEM WITH MUCH
LESS RESPECT THAN THEY DESERVE.

8

(ERIN): CAN YOU HANDLE IT?

9

BRYAN, EXCITING NEWS.

10

OH, YOU WON THE TAYLOR SWIFT
IMPERSONATION CONTEST FOR

11

PEOPLE 28 AND UP.

12

I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW I JOINED IT.

13

OH, YOU DIDN'T?

14

- DID YOU PUT ME IN?
- I SUBMITTED YOU.

15

- OH.
- I SUBMITTED YOU, YEAH.

16

NO, MY BELLY BUTTON'S
ALL HEALED. AFTER 6 MONTHS...

17

FROM WHAT? FROM WHAT?

18

REMEMBER I SAID THAT
SHE WAS BROKEN?

19

NO.

20

YEAH, SHE WAS--

21

HOW WAS YOUR-- WHAT WAS SHE
NOT DOING THAT WAS UP TO PAR?

22

WELL REMEMBER HOW YOU ARE A
DERMATOLOGIST, AND YOU HAVE

23

THAT SAYING WHERE IT GOES...
IF IT'S DRY BITCH GET

24

IT WET.

25

YEAH.

26

IF IT'S WET BITCH GET IT DRY.

27

THAT'S ALL DERMATOLOGY IS.

28

- I WAS DOING THAT.
- YOU WERE?

29

IT DIDN'T WORK, BUT ALAS I
STARTED GOING TO ACUPUNCTURE...

30

UH-HUH.

31

I STARTED GETTING CUPPING,
ON MY BACK, MY COUPES.

32

OH RIGHT, YEAH, YEAH.

33

I CALL IT COUPES, BECAUSE I
LOVE A LITTLE DEUCE COUPLE.

34

THAT'S MY FAVORITE BEASTIE
BOY SONG, AND SO I...

35

IT'S THE BEACH BOYS.

36

THERE THE SAME THING.

37

AND THAT'S YOUR FAVORITE SONG?

38

LITTLE DEUCE COUPE IS YOUR
FAVORITE SONG?

39

EVER. EVER, IT'S GOING TO BE LIKE--

40

YOU NEED TO LISTEN
TO ANYTHING ELSE.

41

IT'S GOING TO BE MY WEDDING
SONG. IT'S GOING TO BE MY

42

FUNERAL SONG. IT'S GOING TO
BE-- I'M GOING TO PUT IT ON

43

WHEN I GIVE BIRTH.

44

WOW.

45

EVEN IF I HAVE A C-SECTION,
I'LL BE LIKE YOU BETTER

46

DEUCE COUPE IT.

47

YOU LISTEN TO THE BEST MUSIC.

48

I DO.

49

SO MY BELLY BUTTON'S ALL HEALED.

50

RIGHT.

51

IT LOOKED LIKE A SNAKE WHO
HAD JUST MOLTED IT'S SKIN

52

AT ALL TIMES.

53

I COULDN'T PUT-- I PUT AS MUCH
LOTION IN THERE. IT

54

DIDN'T DO ANYTHING.

55

I PUT ALCOHOL IN THERE,
IT DIDN'T DO ANYTHING.

56

I FUCKING DID THE WORKS.
IT WAS APOTHECARY STORE IN THERE.

57

AND THEN YOU KNOW WHAT I DID? I
STARTED GOING TO ACUPUNCTURE,

58

AND I STOPED SMOKING, AND
IT WENT AWAY.

59

SO I REALLY THINK THAT'S A
TESTAMENT TO THE HEALING POWER OF--

60

CIGARETTE SMOKING WAS
EATING YOUR BELLY BUTTON ALIVE.

61

I THINK IT WAS.

62

- YEAH.
- YEAH.

63

YOU HAVEN'T SMOKED EITHER
FOR A LONG TIME.

64

NO. NOT SINCE THE 80S.

65

DO YOU THINK IT'S FUNNY
THAT WE SMOKED AT THE SAME TIME, AND

66

THEN WE QUIT SMOKING AT THE SAME TIME?

67

IT IS FUNNY. IT'S
LITTLE BIT LIKE UH...

68

IT'S WEIRD.

69

IT'S WEIRD.

70

YEAH.

71

WHEN ONE OF US IS SMOKING,
THE OTHER ONE SHOULD BE LIKE

72

YOU GOT TO STOP.

73

YEAH.

74

BUT WE DON'T DO THAT. THE
OTHER ONE JUST STARTS SMOKING.

75

NO.

76

HE'S SMOKING, I'M GOING TO SMOKE.

77

HELLO, HELLO. GUESS WHAT
I SAW THIS WEEKEND?

78

CAN I GUESS?

79

YES.

80

OK, YOU SAW ROSEMARY'S BABY. YOU SAW--

81

NO, BUT CLOSE.

82

OK.

83

I SAW--

84

PETALS IN THE WIND?

85

NO, I WISH. I WISH ONE OTHER
THING. I WENT TO THE CEMETERY

86

SCREENING, AND SAW SEVEN. HERE'S--

87

SEVEN WITH BRAD PITT?

88

YEAH.

89

OH, GOD. THAT WAS WHERE
HE AND GWYNNIE MET.

90

THAT'S RIGHT.

91

HE MEETS ALL OF HIS WIVES ON MOVIES.

92

I HAVE 2 POINTS. THE FIRST
ONE IS I EXPLAINED TO MY MOM, WHAT THE CEMETERY

93

SCREENING WAS. SHE HAD
ONE WORD. DISGUSTING.

94

YEAH--

95

SHE HATES THE IDEA.

96

DID SHE THINK YOU WERE
BEING DISRESPECTFUL?

97

SHE GOES, I'VE NEVER HEARD
OF ANY SUCH THING IN MY LIFE.

98

AND I WAS LIKE, THERE'S A
FIRST TIME FOR ANYTHING.

99

DID YOU TELL HER JOEY RAMONE'S THERE?

100

I DID, AND THEN SHE WAS LIKE...

101

WELL FORGET IT THEN.

102

YEAH.

103

I LOVE THE PUNK SCENE, AND
THEN SHE, YOU KNOW.

104

SHE TOOK OFF HER LEATHER JACKET,
PUT ON HER LIPSTICK--

105

SHE PROJECTILE VOMITED, AND
STABBED MY DAD.

106

IS EVERYONE ALRIGHT?

107

- EVERYONE'S FINE.
- YEAH.

108

THIS IS WHAT I WANTED TO SAY
ABOUT GWYNETH PALTROW--

109

IN SEVEN.

110

I BELIEVES NONE OF IT. AND YOU
KNOW WHAT, I DON'T EVEN

111

HATE HER AS MUCH
OTHER PEOPLE HATE HER--

112

DID YOU BELIEVE THAT SHE WAS
THE HEAD IN THE BOX?

113

I BELIEVED THAT SHE WAS THE
HEAD IN THE BOX. SHE BASICALLY

114

HAS A BRITISH ACCENT. YOU DON'T
BELIEVE FOR A SECOND

115

THAT'S SHE'S MARRIED TO SOME
BLUE COLLARED COP, AND

116

SHE LIVES IN A SHITTY APARTMENT.

117

WHY DOES SHE HAVE A BRITISH ACCENT?

118

SHE ALMOST DOES. SHE HAS A
GWYNETH PALTROW ACCENT.

119

SHE'S JUST CLEARLY BETTER THAN
EVERYTHING IN THAT MOVIE.

120

THE CRAZIEST THING IS THAT SHE
TALKS TO MORGAN FREEMAN, AND

121

IS LIKE I DON'T HAVE ANYONE TO
TALK TO, BUT I'M PREGNANT,

122

AND I DON'T KNOW HOW TO TELL
BRAD PITT. AND THEN YOU'RE LIKE,

123

WHY ARE YOU TELLING MORGAN
FREEMAN, AND SHE'S LIKE

124

I DON'T HAVE ANY FRIENDS, AND
YOU'RE LIKE THIS WOMAN HAS

125

A WHOLE GAGGLE OF GIRL
FRIENDS, LIKE THIS PERSON,

126

AND THEY'RE ALL MEAN GIRLS, AND
THEY'RE ALL BITCHES,

127

AND SHE WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO
WAIT TO TELL ONE OF THEM.

128

THAT SHE WAS PREGNANT.

129

THAT SHE WAS PREGNANT TO RUB IT IN THEIR FACE.

130

EXACTLY. SO SHE WOULD EVER
TALK TO MORGAN FREEMAN?

131

NO WAY JOSE.

132

OH, CUZ HE'S BLACK?

133

YEAH. WELL, I DON'T KNOW ABOUT
THAT, BUT SHE'S NOT GOING

134

TO GO AND TALK TO LIKE THE PARTNER OF...

135

THE PARTNER OF HER HUSBAND COP?

136

EXACTLY. WHEN SHE HAS, AND
SHE CLAIMS TO NOT HAVE FRIENDS,

137

AND THEY LIVE IN MANHATTAN.
I DIDN'T BELIVE A WORD.

138

YOU GOT TO HAVE ONE FRIEND
IN MANHATTAN. I BET SHE GOES

139

TO STARBUCKS. TALK TO
YOUR BARISTA.

140

YEAH, THAT'S WHAT I SCREAMED
THE WHOLE TIME. EVERY TIME

141

SHE CAME ON THE SCREEN I SAID,
TALK TO YOUR BARISTA.

142

YEAH, THEY MIGHT SPELL YOUR
NAME WRONG, BUT THEY'RE THERE TO TALK.

143

144

PEW, PEW, PEW, PEW...

145

146

(SOUNDS OUT THE "HERE COMES
THE BRIDE" WEDDING SONG)

147

GOOD NEWS, I'M GOING TO A WEDDING.

148

THAT'S THE WORSE NEWS.

149

THIS IS HOW I GO TO ALL WEDDINGS.

150

DRESSED AS A BRIDE?

151

YEAH.

152

- THAT'S REALLY COOL.
- BECAUSE YOU WANT TO FIT IN.

153

(LAUGHS) YEAH. THAT'S REALLY COOL.

154

SO BRYAN, THE AVERAGE COST OF
A WEDDING IN NEW YORK CITY GUESS.

155

$45,000 THOUSAND.

156

MORE.

157

- YOU'RE KIDDING?
- NO.

158

60.

159

MORE.

160

70?

161

5000 MORE.

162

- $75000 THOUSAND
DOLLARS IS THE AVERAGE?
- YEAH.

163

YOU WOULD BE REALLY BAD
ON PRICE IS RIGHT

164

WEDDING ADDITION?

165

THANK YOU.

166

JUST BECAUSE YOU WOULD NEVER
GET TO WHATEVER,

167

CONTESTANTS ROW.

168

IT NEVER GETS OLD HEARING
WHAT I WOULD BE BAD AT.

169

SO, MY WEDDING--

170

YEAH.

171

COST $5000 DOLLARS AND BELIEVE
THIS OR NOT, WRIGLEY'S BELIEVE IT OR NOT--

172

I THINK YOU MEAN RIPLEY'S BUT
WE'LL GO FROM THERE. SURE.

173

WRIGLEY'S FIELD, THE CHICAGO CUBS.

174

THEY, THEY BEING ME--

175

THE CHICAGO CUBS BEING YOU. SURE.

176

THE CHICAGO CUBS BOUGHT
MY WEDDING DRESS.

177

SURE, OK.

178

THAT WAS $2000 DOLLARS, AND
THEN WE SPENT $3000 DOLLARS

179

ON EVERYTHING ELSE. THAT WAS IT.
$5000 DOLLARS.

180

SO YOU SPENT HALF YOUR WEDDING
BUDGET ON YOUR DRESS.

181

YEAH, AND YOU KNOW WHAT'S
FUNNY? I'VE NEVER WORN IT AGAIN.

182

WHY WOULD YOU?

183

SO REALLY IT WAS WORTH ALL THE MONEY.

184

RIGHT.

185

WEDDING'S BE EXPENSIVE,
WE ALL KNOW.

186

YEAH.

187

I JUST SAID IT. YOU SAID IT.

188

YEAH.

189

WE'VE ALL SAID IT. GUESS WHO
ELSE IT'S EXPENSIVE FOR?

190

THERE'S A LOT OF GUESSING IN THIS?

191

YOU AGAIN?

192

YOU WERE SO CLOSE WHEN YOU SAID GUESS.

193

GUEST.

194

YES.

195

IT IS WHICH IS WHY...

196

NO, SAY IT BECAUSE I'M GOING
TO SAY SOME THINGS TODAY.

197

I THINK HE'S PROBABLY DONE
GOING TO WEDDINGS.

198

YOU ARE.

199

- YES.
- YEAH.

200

I THINK I WILL SEND THE GIFT,
AND SAY... (CLAPS) MOVE ON, YEAH.

201

CONGRATULATIONS?

202

WELL, YOU WON'T BE ALONE. I WILL
GO THROUGH ALL OF THE--

203

BUT UNLESS IT WAS A VERY CLOSE
FRIEND. NOW I'M FEELING

204

GUILTY. ANYWAY.

205

NO, I WILL--

206

BUT THEN IF I DON'T GO SOMEONE
WILL NO THAT THEY'RE...

207

I CAN'T... I'M D--

208

UH, I LOVE HIM.

209

- YOU LOVE ALL WEDDINGS.
- MM-HMM.

210

OK, WELL THAT WAS
AMAZING TO WATCH.

211

THIS IS A QUOTE FROM
SOMEBODY... I LOVE IT.

212

CELEBRITY WEDDINGS AND REALITY
TV ARE RAISING THE BAR

213

FOR LAVISH WEDDINGS, SAYS UMMU
BRADLEY THOMAS, FOUNDER OF THE

214

FREDDIE BELL JONES MODELING
AND FINISHING SCHOOL IN DENTON

215

MARYLAND.

216

THANK GOD. THEY WENT TO THE
RIGHT PERSON. WHO CAN WE

217

TRUST TO SAY--

218

FREDDIE BELL JONES.

219

WHO CAN WE TRUST TO SAY THAT
CELEBRITY WEDDINGS ARE LAVISH.

220

THERE'S SO MANY--

221

THERE'S ONLY ONE MAN.

222

UMMU, OHMO FROM DENTON
MARYLAND FINISHING SCHOOL.

223

BUT HERE'S THE THING, THERE'S SO
MANY NAMES IN THIS

224

UMMU BRADLEY THOMAS OF THE
FREDDIE BELL JONES MODELING

225

AND FINISHING SCHOOL.

226

FREDDIE BELL JONES. FREDDIE BELL
JONES FINISHING SCHOOL.

227

WHO IS FREDDIE BELL--

228

I DON'T KNOW BUT I WANT TO BE
THEIR RECEPTIONIST.

229

I AM GOING TO NAME MY FIRST
CHILD FREDDIE BELL JONES.

230

ME TOO, AND I'M GOING TO SAY
YOU WERE NAMED AFTER A FINISHING

231

SCHOOL. LIVE UP TO THE NAME.

232

LIVE UP TO THE NAME. YOU BETTER
BE BORN WITH A BOOK

233

ON YOUR HEAD.

234

YES.

235

YOU'RE GOING TO BE WALKING
STRAIGHT BITCH.

236

THAT'S RIGHT, AND THEN
SOMEONE TO TALK TO MY CHILD.

237

FREDDIE BELL JONES, YOU
BETTER DO IT RIGHT.

238

FREDDIE BELL JONES HIT A HOME
RUN. DO IT WITH GOOD POSTURE.

239

AND WE GO TO PARENT TEACHER CONFERENCES--

240

HOW ARE YOU GOING TO ANSWER
THE PHONE? THEY'RE GOING TO

241

KNOW YOU DON'T TALK LIKE THAT.

242

FATHER OF FREDDIE BELL JONES.

243

BUT THEN I TALK NORMAL WITH MY FRIENDS.

244

I REALLY GIVE MY SON A
COMPLEX, BECAUSE I'M LIKE

245

HEY, HOW WAS YOUR DAY KATHY,
YOUR LIKE, DUH-DUH-DUH...

246

I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO NAME MY
DAUGHTER KATHY, BLAH BLAH BLAH.

247

(GASPS) FREDDIE BELL JONES.
HOW WAS YOUR DAY FREDDIE

248

BELL JONES?

249

(LAUGHS)

250

ENOUGH ABOUT FREDDIE BELL JONES,
SO THIS YEAR GUESTS

251

ON AVERAGE ARE EXPECTED TO
SPEND ALMOST $600 DOLLARS

252

PER WEDDING.

253

I DON'T SPEND THAT MUCH.

254

I'M GOING TO BREAK IT DOWN.

255

DO THEY FACTOR IN LIKE--

256

I'M GOING TO TELL YOU WHAT THE
WHOLE BREAKDOWN IS.

257

OK.

258

SO IF YOU'RE JUST A GUEST IT IS
$539 DOLLARS, AND HERE'S

259

HOW THEY BREAK IT DOWN. $57
DOLLARS FOR DRESSING UP.

260

I DON'T KNOW WHERE YOU WOULD
BUY A DRESS FOR $57 DOLLARS, BUT...

261

WELL I DO $50 DOLLAR DRESSES.

262

OH, YOU DO THAT AT YOUR $50
DOLLAR DRESS PLACE?

263

I JUST TAKE SHEETS THAT I'M DONE
WITH, AND I DO A DRESS.

264

ALWAYS SLEEVELESS AND STRAPLESS.

265

SO IT'S A TOGA.

266

YEAH.

267

OH, IT'S JUST A SHEET WRAPPED
AROUND YOUR NAKED BODY.

268

YEAH.

269

OK. HOTEL STAY IS $95 DOLLARS
WHICH I THINK IS LOW.

270

OH, VERY LOW. THAT'S MOTEL STAY.

271

YEAH. TRANSPORTATION 72,
WHICH I ALSO THINK IS LOW.

272

BACHELOR, BACHELORETTE
PARTY $60 DOLLARS.

273

THE LAST BACHELORETTE PARTY I
WENT TO I SPENT NEARLY $400 DOLLARS.

274

ON WHAT?

275

HOUSING, ON DINNERS, ON--

276

BUT I THINK YOU PROBABLY DID IT UP.

277

WE DID A WEEKEND, I GUESS. YEAH.
I'M JUST LIKE, I WOULD

278

NEVER DO IT.

279

FOR MY BACHELOR PARTY I'M
DOING A RELAY RACE.

280

OH, YOU ARE?

281

YEAH--

282

3 LEGGED?

283

YEAH. I'M GOING TO A TRACK,
AND I'M TYING EVERYONE

284

TOGETHER, AND I'M GOING TO PUT
10 WILD HORSES BEHIND US.

285

BECAUSE OF THE ROLLING STONES SONG?

286

- YEAH.
- YEAH.

287

AND THAT'S GOING TO BLARE.
SOMEONE'S GOING TO DO A GUN

288

SHOT IN THE AIR, AND WE HAVE
TO RUN OR FACE TRAMPLEATION.

289

YOU'RE CHASED BY WILD HORSES,
AND YOU GET A HEAD START,

290

AND WILD HORSES PLAYS, AND
THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO ARE INVITED--

291

WHO GETS A HEAD START?

292

THE ONLY PEOPLE--

293

OVER THE HORSES?

294

(LAUGHS)THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO
ARE INVITED TO MY BACHELOR PARTY,

295

ALL MY FRIENDS MOTHERS, AND--

296

AND YOU. SO IT'S ALL OF YOUR
MOM'S FRIENDS AND YOU,

297

AND YOU'RE CHOOSING TO
TRAMPLE THEM WITH HORSES.

298

BY THE WAY, IF YOU'RE HANGING OUT WITH--

299

THEY GOT TO RUN.

300

50 YEAR OLD WOMAN--

301

EVERYONE HAS A CHANCE.

302

IF YOU'RE HANGING OUT WITH 50
YEAR OLD WOMAN, AND YOU'RE

303

SAYING YOU'RE GOING TO GIVE THEM
A HEAD START, AGAINST HORSES?

304

ALL WE GOT TO DO IS SHOW UP AND
GO ON THE TRACK, AND

305

THAT'S MY BACHELOR PARTY. FREE TO ALL.

306

LOOK IF YOU PUT IT ON YOUTUBE
YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO PAY

307

WRITES TO THE ROLLING STONES.
YOU HAVEN'T THOUGHT ABOUT THAT.

308

I'M NOT DOING YOUTUBE. IT'S A
PRIVATE OPERATION.

309

ALRIGHT, WELL LOOK, I DON'T HAVE
ANYTHING ELSE TO ADD.

310

AND COOLIO'S GOING TO PLAY AT THE
RECEPTION, BUT THAT'S A

311

DIFFERENT THING.

312

LET ME SAY THIS IN CLOSING, IT DOES
SEEM LIKE BECAUSE

313

WEDDINGS ARE GETTING MORE
EXPENSIVE, THAT NOW TO OFFSET IT

314

THE BRIDE AND GROOM ARE MAKING
THE WEDDINGS MORE TANTALIZING

315

TO GET PEOPLE TO COME.

316

SO IT'S A REALLY FUN CIRCLE OF
JUST EVERYTHING GETTING MORE EXPENSIVE.

317

YEAH.

318

SO I SAY THIS, CAN WE GO BACK
TO THE 70S WHERE YOU WEAR

319

A BEAUTIFUL LITTLE FAIRY DRESS.
YOUR MOM WILL DO YOUR

320

HAIR UP. YOU GET SOME FLOWERS--

321

I DID SNIP THOSE FLOWERS FROM MY NEIGHBOR'S BUSH.

322

OK.

323

SO YOU DO THAT.

324

OK.

325

SHARE YOUR BEAUTIFUL DAY WITH
PEOPLE WHO YOU LOVE, AND SAVE

326

YOUR MONEY.

327

AND SAVE YOUR VIRGINITY FOR THE
WEDDING DAY PLEASE LADIES.

328

NO.

329

NO ONE WANTS TO...

330

NO ONE... EVERYONE WANTS TO FUCK.

331

NO ONE WANTS...

332

EVERYONE WANTS TO FUCK.

333

NO ONE WANTS TO MARRY SOMEONE WHO'S...

334

EVERYBODY DOES.

335

BEEN AROUND.

336

EXPERIENCED. WHO KNOWS HOW
TO SUCK A DICK. EVERYONE WANTS

337

- TO MARRY THAT PERSON--
- NO ONE WANTS TO KNOW.

338

- EVERYBODY WANTS SOME...
NO ONE WANTS TO...

339

340

ERIN, WHAT HAPPENS WHEN A
VIKING IS TRAINED TO HUNT

341

A DRAGON, BUT THEN HE FINDS
OUT THAT HE LIKES DRAGONS, AND

342

DECIDES NOT TO HUNT THEM BUT
INSTEAD BEFRIENDS THEM?

343

IS THAT HOW TO TRAIN
YOUR DRAGON 2?

344

IT IS. I THINK IT'S THE FIRST ONE. I THINK
PRESUMABLY THE SECOND ONE--

345

I'VE SEEN THAT TRAILER ABOUT
A KA-JILLION TIMES.

346

YEAH. ME TO. I'VE TOLD YOU BEFORE
HOW MY MOM CONFUSED

347

HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON WITH
THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATOO--

348

YEAH.

349

AND KEPT TELLING ME HOW CUTE AND
ADORABLE THE GIRL WITH

350

THE DRAGON TATTOO WAS.

351

I'M ACTUALLY MAD YOU CORRECTED HER.

352

I SHOULDN'T HAVE. AND MY MOM ALSO ONE
TIME WROTE A LETTER TO WES CRAVEN.

353

DID I TELL YOU THAT?

354

AFTER SHE SAW SCREAM, SHE
WENT AND WROTE ABOUT A 10 PAGE

355

LETTER TO WES CRAVEN. DISGUSTING.

356

10 PAGES?

357

HORRIBLE.

358

I HOPE HE LAUGHED.

359

I HOPE THEY SHUT DOWN YOUR MOVIES.

360

I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF SHE
SENT IT, BECAUSE HOW WOULD SHE HAVE--

361

THERE IS NO WAY MY MOM WAS
LIKE, HOLLYWOOD, WES CRAVEN IMMEDIATELY.

362

WHAT ABOUT THIS MOVIE THOUGH?

363

HOW TO TRAIN YOUR
DRAGON 2, GUESS WHAT?

364

THEY HATE GAY PEOPLE.

365

NO. ONE OTHER--

366

THEY LOVE GAY PEOPLE.

367

YEAH. ONE OF THE CHARACTERS
IN IT IS GAY. GOBBER THE BELCH.

368

HE'S VOICED BY CRAIG FERGUSON.

369

(ERIN): OH, AND HE GOBBLES ON DICK?

370

(BRYAN): AND HE'S THE RIGHT
HAND MAN TO BIRK TRIBAL CHIEF

371

STOICK THE VAST. I'VE HAD
ENOUGH HONESTLY. THE ONLY REASON

372

I'M TALKING ABOUT THIS
GARBAGE IS BECAUSE IT'S A BIG DEAL.

373

THAT WAS A BIG MOVIE RIGHT?

374

YEAH, IT WAS A HUGE MOVIE.
THAT'S WHY THEY DID A SEQUEL.

375

SOMETIMES THEY DO SEQUELS
WHEN THEY'RE LIKE, WELL WHY NOT.

376

THE POINT IS HE'S COMING
OUT AS GAY. THE WRITER/DIRECTOR--

377

HE'S COMING OUT IN THE MOVIE?

378

YES. HE SAYS, SO HERE'S
WHAT THE LINE IS--

379

THAT'S NOT IN ANY
OF THE PREVIEWS.

380

THE LINE WRITTEN--

381

THAT SHOULD BE THE ONLY
PREVIEW IS JUST HIM COMING--

382

I'M GAY!

383

YEAH.

384

HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON 2. BOOM!

385

THE LINE WRITTEN IS HE'S LIKE
REFERRING TO SOME OTHER

386

CHARACTERS WHO ARE LIKE--

387

HUSBAND AND WIFE ARE FIGHTING
IN HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON,

388

LIKE SOME ANIMATED HUSBAND AND WIFE.

389

GOBBER THE FART SAYS THIS IS
WHY I NEVER GOT MARRIED.

390

AND THEN CRAIG FERGUSON AD-LIBBED
THE LINE, YEP GOBBER

391

IS COMING OUT OF THE CLOSET,
AND THEY KEPT THE LINE.

392

THEY WERE LIKE, YEAH, LET'S KEEP IT.
THE WRITER/DIRECTOR

393

OF THIS MOVIE IS OPENLY GAY.
HIS NAME IS DEAN DEBLOIS, SAID

394

I THINK IT'S A REALLY FUN AND
DARING MOVE, AND I LIKE THE IDEA

395

THAT GOBBER IS BERK
STROCK'S RESIDENT GAY.

396

FINE, I DON'T LIKE THAT
EXPRESSION, BUT FINE, GREAT.

397

WHAT'S BERK STROCKS?
IS THAT A CITY?

398

HE'S THE MAIDEN GUY.

399

WELL THAT WASN'T THE FIRST
MAIN STREAM ANIMATED MOVIE

400

TO HAVE A GAY CHARACTER.
DO YOU KNOW THAT MOVIE

401

PARANORMAN THAT CAME OUT
A YEAR AGO? THAT MOVIE ALSO

402

HAD A GAY WRITER/DIRECTOR.
HIS NAME IS CHRIS BUTLER.

403

OH, CUZ BUTT?

404

YEAH.

405

SO THIS WAS TOWARDS THE END
OF THE MOVIE, KATHY WHO'S

406

THE TEENAGER SAYS TO MITCH...

407

SO I WAS THINKING MAYBE WE
COULD DO SOMETHING SOMETIMES.

408

NOTHING SCARY.

409

THAT SOUNDS GREAT KATHY.
YOU KNOW, YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE

410

MY BOYFRIEND. HE'S LIKE A TOTAL
CHICK FLICK NUT.

411

- WOAH.
- YEAH.

412

- JUST DROPPED THE BOYFRIEND.
- WHAT A NICE LESSON.

413

AND THEN SHE GOES LIKE THIS...

414

NOT LIKE CONFUSED, NOT CONFUSED--

415

SHE'S NOT MAD.

416

NO, JUST SORT OF LIKE,
OH, I DIDN'T KNOW.

417

ALMOST DIDN'T LOOK GOOD,
LIKE OH DIDN'T KNOW THAT.

418

AND THIS IS WHAT I'LL LEAVE IT
ON, THIS IS NOT A CARTOON

419

BUT I AM DYING TO WATCH ONCE
UPON A TIME. HAVE YOU EVER

420

SEEN THAT BONKERS SHOW?

421

NO.

422

IT'S LIKE A LIVE ACTION LIKE...

423

(ERIN): FAIRY TALE.

424

(BRYAN): FAIRY TALE.

425

EVERY PROMO I'VE EVER SEEN
FOR IT LOOKS LIKE THE MOST INSANE

426

THING I'VE EVER SEEN.

427

I'VE SHOCKED YOU'RE
NOT WATCHING IT.

428

I SHOULD BE WATCHING IT.

429

IN 2013, THERE WAS AN EPISODE--

430

LAST YEAR.

431

YEAH, OF ONCE UPON A TIME.
WHERE MULAN

432

(ERIN): FROM MOULIN ROUGE.

433

(BRYAN): NO, FROM THE MOVIE MULAN.

434

(ERIN): OK.

435

FROM THE DISNEY CARTOON
EXCEPT SHE'S THE LIVE ACTION

436

CHARACTER IN ONCE UPON A TIME--

437

OH, I DON'T UNDERSTAND THE SHOW BUT--

438

SO, MULAN IS LIKE CLASSIC WARRIOR MULAN.

439

SHE'S A LAWYER?

440

NO, SHE'S A WARRIOR.

441

- OK.
- YEAH.

442

THEY DON'T PUT THEM IN LIKE REAL TIME?

443

NO.

444

OH, OK.

445

AND MULAN REVEALS THAT SHE'S
BI-SEXUAL, HAS FEELINGS

446

FOR PRINCE PHILIP WHO'S FROM
SLEEPING BEAUTY BUT

447

ALSO FOR AURORA WHO'S ALSO
FROM SLEEPING BEAUTY FOR

448

THE PRINCESS.

449

ALL OF THIS IS FAN FICTION.

450

YEAH.

451

ISN'T THAT CRAZY?

452

THAT'S CRAZY.

453

IS THAT COSPLAY?

454

NO, COSPLAY IS WHERE YOU
DRESS UP AND FUCK PEOPLE IN

455

LIKE COSTUMES.

456

SO THIS SHOW IS COSPLAY.

457

BUT THEY'RE DOING IT FOR PAY
SO IT'S MORE LIKE PROSTITUTION.

458

COSPAY.

459

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