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The video opens with still shot of Will Ferrell, a computer graphic and the text – WILL FERRELL ANSWERS INTERNET QUESTIONS! The shot cuts to Will Ferrell sitting at a desk.

Will Ferrell: Hi, I’m Will Ferrell, saying hello to you, out there. I thought, I’m going to answer some unfiltered questions from sites like Ain’t it cool News, uh, Ropes of Silicon, Chud, Collider, to interact with all the nice fans out there who’ve supported me since Anchorman and Old School and and take some of your questions. Here’s question number one. We’ll start from filmfanatick54.

An icon of a reel of film appears on the left of the screen with the text filmfanatick54 beneath it.

Will Ferrell: It says, “Dear Will, you suck dick. You do weak sauce movies, you douche-lick. I hate your guts.”

The following text appears beneath Will Ferrell as he reads. Dear Will, you suck dick. You do weak sauce movies, you douche-lick. I h8 ur guts.

Will Ferrell: Alright, thank you for your question filmfanatick54. Um, it was really more a statement than a question. Next question is from willferrelblows.

An icon appears on the left of the screen. The icon is still shot of Will Ferrell looking bizarre. The username WiLlFeRrelLbLoWs appears beneath the icon.

Will Ferrell: “Will, do you wake up every morning, look in the mirror and say: ‘I think I will suck a giant hard one today.’ Honestly, because that’s what it seems like. I would rather put a glass tube up my penis hole and smash it with a hammer than watch one of your movies. For real, get the dick out of your mouth.”

The following subtitles appear beneath Will Ferrell as he reads. “Will do you wake up every morning look in the mirror and say: ‘i think i will suck a giant hard one today’? honestly. bcuz that’s what it seems like. I would rather put a glass tube up my penis hole & smash it w/ a hammer than watch 1 of ur movies. 4 real. get the dick out of ur mouth.

Will Ferrell: Ok. To answer the question, no, I don’t look in the mirror and say I want to suck a high hard one today. This is from, I will not. That’s kind of clever.

An icon of an elf action figure, based on Will Ferrell’s role in the film Elf, appears on the left of the screen. Beneath the icon is the username IwILLnoT.

Will Ferrell: “Will, when you suck dick,” (the preceding text appeared as subtitles) Um, I guess I wasn’t clear before when I said that I don’t suck penises. Um, my bad. This is from will Ferrell should crawl up his own butthole and die 465. Wow, four hundred and sixty four other people had that name. That’s very specific.

An icon that shows Will Ferrell’s face, painfully sunburned, appears on the left of the screen. The username WillFerrellshouldcrawluphisownbuttholeanddie465 appears beneath the icon.

Will Ferrell: Here’s one. Um, this is from Fos Binder rules.

An icon of an unidentified musician standing in front of a drum set appears on the left of the screen. The username FosBinderRulz appears beneath the icon.

Will Ferrell: “I’m a film student at Northwestern. I have just completed my Master’s degree. I have a very serious question I would like to ask you about film theory: I’ll start by asking, why don’t you get a dick real hard and then put it in that hole in your face?”

The following subtitles appeared while Will Ferrell spoke. I’m a film student at Northwestern, I have just completed my masters degree. I have a very serious question I would like to ask you about film theory: I’ll start by asking why don’t you get a dick real hard and put it in that hole in your face?

Will Ferrell: Ok, I don’t think you’re serious about film or asking me about anything, so let’s just move on. All right, next up, let’s see. Oh, here’s a nice one. Will Ferrell is the best 55.

An icon showing a still shot of Will Ferrell’s face from Semi-Pro appears on the left of the screen. The username WillFerrellisthebest55 appears beneath the icon. “Hey Will Ferrell, I chose my screen name when I was eleven years old.” That’s so nice, thank you. “Now, I’m a grown man and I think you and the Wiggles and Scooby Doo all blow boat people. And by that, I mean put hard boners in your wet mouth.” Yeah, yeah, I know what you meant. “Epic fail you loser.”

The following subtitles appeared while Will Ferrell was speaking. Hey Will Ferrell, I chose my screen name when I was 11 years old. Now, I’m a grown man and I think you, the Wiggles, and Scooby Doo all blow boat people. And by that, I mean put hard boners into your wet mouth. EPIC FAIL U LOSER!”

Will Ferrell: Um, alright. Thank you Will Ferrell’s the best. I’m just happy that at one point in your life I was able to provide some laughter for you. Have a great day. Ok. (to someone off-screen) Director, do I really look like someone who puts dicks in my mouth all the time?

Director (voiceover): Yeah!

Will Ferrell: For real?

Director (voiceover): Yes.

Will Ferrell gets up and walks out of view.

Will Ferrell (voiceover): So if I’m walking down the street there are people who are passing going, “hmmmm,” thought bubble, “that looks like someone who puts a penis in his mouth.”

Director (voiceover): Yes.

Will Ferrell (voiceover): You’ve heard it from other people.

Director (voiceover): Yes. It’s cool trivia for the fans.

Will Ferrell (voiceover): It’s not trivia. It’s just, I don’t do that. I don’t know why they keep asking me that.