The video opens with a headshot of Christopher Mintz-Plasse standing in
front of a neutral colored background. He is wearing a plaid shirt and
wire rim glasses.
Christopher Mintz-Plasse: Hello, Christopher Mintz-Plasse here from
your favorite film Superbad to talk to you about piracy. When you
download a movie illegally, it might not seem like a crime, but it is
because you’re not just stealing from people who don’t need the money,
like producers and studios. You’re stealing from me.
The camera pulls back away from Christopher Mintz-Plasse to give a full body shot.
Christopher Mintz-Plasse: Just because I’m nineteen doesn’t mean that I
don’t need millions and millions of dollars. How the hell am I supposed
to pay for my limo bitch!
Christopher Mintz-Plasse becomes incensed and begins waving his arms in a dramatic fashion.
Christopher Mintz-Plasse: Or my hos? Or my cocaine?
The shot pulls in again to a headshot.
Christopher Mintz-Plasse: That’s right! I have a cocaine habit and each
time you buy Superbad from some dude in Chinatown that’s one less line
of sweet, sweet coke for Mintz-Plasse and his ladies.
The camera pulls back from Christopher Mintz-Plasse for a body shot.
Christopher Mintz-Plasse: I ain’t no ghetto bitch!
The camera pulls in for a headshot.
Christopher Mintz-Plasse: Do I look some broke ass honky that does crack? No, no, no, no, no. I do not.
The camera pulls back for a body shot. Christopher Mintz-Plasse
continues waving his arms and being pointing at the camera in an angry
and dramatic fashion.
Christopher Mintz-Plasse: So, if I see you downloading shit illegally,
I’m gonna get my Glock, shove it up your ass, and blow your lungs out
through your mouth. Don’t fuck with my DVD money boy! I may never work
again and I need it.
Christopher Mintz-Plasse crosses his arms over his chest, looks straight into the camera and gives the viewer a dark look.
The shot cuts to an image of a DVD. The words – DVD Piracy, It’s Wrong!
– are stamped over the DVD. The NBC “more you know” music is played in