Third Date with Will Ferrell

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Will Ferrell and his date, Sharon, are seen sitting in an SUV.

Will Ferrell: So you enjoyed Taste of LA?

Sharon: It was great. I loved it. Yeah.

The screen goes black and the words “third date” appear.

Will Ferrell: You enjoyed the tacos a lot.

Sharon: Yeah.

The image returns to show Will Ferrell and Sharon standing outside a nice house.

Sharon: This is beautiful.

Will Ferrell points at the nice house.

Will Ferrell: Oh, yeah. Oh this…this is actually the Hamilton’s. Here’s my place.

Will Ferrell leads Sharon over to a Port-o-Toilet.

Will Ferrell: Little townhouse I picked up. Got them down from nine hundred to eight ninety one.

Sharon: This is a Port-o-Toilet.

Will Ferrell: I think you’d be surprised. It’s wonderfully detailed and, uh, it’s a nice place. Please.

Sharon: I’m not going to go into a Port-o-Toilet though.

He gestures for her to come over and opens the door.

Will Ferrell: Come on. Let’s just have a glass of wine.

Sharon: This is totally weird.

They start to go inside the Port-o-Toilet.

Sharon: We’re going in here.

Will Ferrell: Yeah.

Sharon: Alright.

Will Ferrell: See? Isn’t that nice?

Sharon: Oh my God!

Will Ferrell: Yeah.

The shot stays on the outside of the Port-o-Toilet but Will Ferrell and Sharon can still be heard.

Sharon: This is beautiful.

Will Ferrell: Thank you. I know.

Sharon: Wow.

Will Ferrell: I’ve got a pool table over here.

You hear the sound of pool balls hitting each other.

Will Ferrell: I don’t know if you enjoy playing pool. This is the media center here.

You hear romantic music playing.

Will Ferrell: Let me pour you some champagne?

Sharon: Ok.

You hear a cork pop.

Will Ferrell: How’s that champagne tasting?

Sharon: You know what, it’s delicious.

Will Ferrell: Oh good. Should we take it upstairs?

Sharon: Ok.

Will Ferrell: You know what? I’m just gonna say it. Let’s get physical.

Sharon: I’m there. Let’s get physical.

There’s a close up on the handle of the Port-o-Toilet door handle. The lock switches over from “open” to “in use.” Romantic music continues to play. The shot cuts to an image of pool balls spreading out over a pool table. The image cuts to black and rolling text appears. It reads:

Will and Sharon made love that night and for six months after

They got married and lived there together until Sharon got sick from drinking non-potable water, forcing them to move.

They are now living happily with their two children in an ATM kiosk.