Professor Rubbish proposes the best way to determine if someone is a geek or not
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Ah, good of you to stop by. There has been much debate about the credentials involved in being a geek. Much debate about the credentials involved in being a geek. Much debate indeed!
I, however, have sought to end this debate. First we must define what a geek is.
Excuse me. Intern!
Geek: a carnival performer who performs sensationally morbid or disgusting acts, as biting off the head of a live chicken.
Hmm...won't you excuse me once again? New intern.
We will forego traditional interpretations. I have come up with a simple equation to determine if one is a geek or not.
The Proof of Geek
Now, as you can see, the best way to implement this is through blood testing.
A standard sample of blood is collected then exposed to a heated wire, copper would be suitable. One would observe the reaction of the blood to the heated wire and depending on the reaction, one can determine the Proof of Geek
The procedure would be conducted by an unbiased proctor, in fact, I have such the person in mind.