The long-awaited music video for the Garfunkel & Oates soon-to-be-classic, "I Don't Understand Job."
- October 11, 2010
- 2.2m Views
- Immortal

Riki Lindhome
Original Song & Lyrics
Kate Micucci
Original Song & Lyrics
Eric Appel
Director
christiansprenger
Cinematographer
BoTown Sound
Sound
Funny Or Die
Uploader
Ally Hord
Producer
Funny Or Die Music
Channel
Hall of Fame
ChannelStarring Kate Micucci and Riki Lindhome
Original Song and Lyrics by Kate Micucci and Riki Lindhome
Directed by Eric Appel
Executive Producer: Mike Farah
Produced by Allison Hord
Director of Photography: Christian Sprenger
1st AC: Alyssa Soetebier
Dolly Grip: Jake Beemer
Gaffer: Cody Jacobs
Key Grip: Ed Titus
DIT: Chris Hoyle
Edited by: Eric Appel
Production Designers: Alexi Gomez, Rachael Ferrara
Sound: BoTown Sound
Makeup: Sara Irving
Featured Extras: Andrew Furtado, Sam Varela, Ashley Barnhill, Michael Monterastelli, Kevin Michaluk, Sean Goode
Production Assistants: Andrew Grissom, Ashlee Roohani, Andrew Furtado, Matt Ingebretson, Liam White, Samantha Weiner
2,191,592
October 11, 2010
Male Voiceover: Exclusive.
[music]
Riki Lindhome and Kate Micucci: ♪ Handjob, bland job, I don’t
understand job. ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ I got a problem and I can’t
contain it, ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ I’ll use my icky, sticky
rhymes to help me explain it. ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ Handy Js are like
Stonehenge to me, ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ Robert Stack can’t even
unsolve this mystery. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ I’m the messed up child of
a baby boomer. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ I was in the gifted class
but a total late bloomer. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ Now I got a secret to get
off my chest. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ Went from kissing to sex,
but never learned the rest. ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ In high school I was in the
marching band, not learning ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ what to do with my hand.
While other girls were ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ dripping like a Jackson
Pollack, I blossomed later
than Mayim Bialik. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ I’m investigating bones
like Deschanel. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ Trying to make it stand up
like Dave Chappelle. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ When I stare the down the
barrel of a semi-hard dick, ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ I feel more singled out
than Chris Hardwick. ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ I studies Bach, Sasha Rock,
and Isaac Asimov, but I ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ wasn’t on the C bus jerking
people off. ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ Wouldn’t let you touch my
chest like your vapo-
rubbing vixen, ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ let alone deep throat your
tricky Dick Nixon. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ I wanna learn how to make
your Watergates flow. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ I’m resigned like Spiro
Agnew that I might never know, ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ how to HJ your L.B Johnson.
Know less about dicks
than Samantha Ronson. ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ I should have explored new
frontiers like Will Wheaton, ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ but I was more conservative
than Alex P. Keaton. ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ I’ve fallen into crisis
just like the Dow. ♪
Kate Micucci and Riki Lindhome: ♪ I want to give a handjob,
but I don’t know how. ♪
Kate Micucci and Riki Lindhome: ♪ Handjob, bland job, I don’t
understand job. ♪
Kate Micucci and Riki Lindhome: ♪ Do I spit? Do I squeeze?
Do I ever touch the top? ♪
Kate Micucci and Riki Lindhome: ♪ How can I learn when you
always make me stop? ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ Now I’m on a full blown
investigation to unlock the
secrets of ejaculation. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ I need a translator like
I’m reading Balzac to crack ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ the Rosetta Stone over your
ball sack. ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ The top is the part that
confuses me the most. ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ It looks like a silly
putty Pacman ghost. ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ Sometimes it’s jello
giggling, sometimes it’s denser, ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ but they all look like a
Darth Vader Pez dispenser. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ Like Sam Jackson, I’m not
so good with shaft, ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ when it’s soft and flabby
like President Taft. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ It’s like a deep South
queen that you want to make straight. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ Will I make it upright if I
move it like a shake-weight. ♪
Kate Micucci and Riki Lindhome: ♪ Move it like a
shake-weight. ♪
Kate Micucci and Riki Lindhome: ♪ Move it like a
shake-weight. ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ Now I’m pumping like brakes
that aren’t anti-lock, ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ trying not to go psycho on
your Alfred Hitchcock. ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ I go a little faster and
then I retard, it’s like a ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ hamster that you don’t want
to squeeze too hard. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ I’m working my hand 'til it
gets arthritis. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ I’ll be holding 'til I get
the golden touch of Midas. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ I think, therefore I am,
getting my Descartes on, ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ 'til I fully comprehend
your Marcia Gay hard-on. ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ But the biggest throbbing
question of all, ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ is seriously what do you do
with the balls. ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ Do I roll them like dice?
Do I mold them like clay? ♪
Riki Lindhome: ♪ Do I tickle them like Elmo
or do I throw them like a part-ay? ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ Do I move them all around
or do I cup it slow? ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ They’re like the two old
critics from the Muppet Show, ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ just sitting there cranky
and superfluous. ♪
Kate Micucci: ♪ How bout I don’t touch them
unless you insist? ♪
Riki Lindhome and Kate Micucci: ♪ Handjob, bland job,
I don’t understand job. ♪
Riki Lindhome and Kate Micucci: ♪ Do I spit? Do I squeeze?
Do I ever touch the top? ♪
Riki Lindhome and Kate Micucci: ♪ How can I learn when you
always make me stop? ♪
[music]
Kate Micucci and Riki Lindhome: ♪ How can I learn when you
always make me stop? ♪