How would you describe yourself?

Full Credits

Dan Black
Mike Hanford
Tim Kalpakis
Chris Vanartsdalen
Rell Battle
Jon Komp Shin
Patrick Finerty
Presley Massara
Dan Bernstein
Jon Millstein
Darren Miller
Fran Gillespie
Garrett Watts
Director: Andy Bush
Writer: Fran Gillespie
Producers: Sean Dacanay & Brianne Trosie
Editor: Mike Malarkey
DP: Matt Sweeney
Camera Operator: Artur Gubin
Sound: GoPal Bidari
PA: Adam Jacobs

Stats & Data

April 13, 2015


(soft piano music plays)
(Male Voice): It was a tough decision.
(Male Voice): It was my choice, but I'll be thinking about this decision for
the next couple of weeks.

> We have the option of two pathways to walk through, and they led to two doors.
It was a bit confronting actually. I feel like you had to choose and be
self conscious of the way you perceive yourself. And if, perhaps
that lines up with the way the rest of the world perceives you.

> Which door did you go through?

> Really, do you even need to ask?
(speaks a foreign language)

> I saw the sign for average dick, and I started thinking, what is that,
to 3 inches? So I had to go for the big dick door.

> Yeah, I got to admit it did take me a second there 'cause you're thinking
big penis but are we talking width, are we talking length, are we talking girth,
are we talking weight, because quite frankly, weight is really all I got.

> I walked through the door that said average dick, and I didn't really
feel good about that, because I wasn't being truthful, because I've got a real
hog down there.

> I just wished more young men out there realized it.

> I wanted to go through the average door, but my dad made me go through the
big dick door.

> Ah, that's my boy.

> It's a little weird.

> Yeah.

> That was a close one. I wasn't wearing my glasses, so...
I got a nice, big healthy, juicy dick.

> I have a heavy penis, you know, it's a lot of penis, but it doesn't
take up a lot of area.

> I got a big schlong, man. I'm surprised I even fit through the door.

> Mines big. Mines pretty big.

> Yeah. You're packing hug.

> Yeah, right.

> I'm a big guy. I should be able to go through the big dick door.

> I measured it. It's 20.3 centimeters. Um, it's a bit like Big Ben.

> I'm Tommy, and I have a big dick. Please have sex with me.

> Am I choosing because of what society tells me to believe, because of the
media bombardment, or am I choosing because I have a big dick?