Experience the majesty and excitement of sitting still for several hours in the world-famous traffic of Los Angeles!
Published April 03, 2014 43k views More Info »
Additional Credits
Additional Credits:
Written by: Dan Klein and Emily Strachan
Directed by: Andy Bush
Starring: Tony Hale
Producer/wardrobe: Bette Bentley
Editors: Jack and Justin
DP: Jonathan Hall
Sound: Peter Olsted
Makeup: Leigh Schwartz
PA: John McKay
PA: Ben Adams
777 Funny Votes
250 Die Votes
43,058 Views
Published April 03, 2014

(CARS HONKING)
C'MON, MOVE!
C'MON, MOVE!
ALRIGHT, IT LOOKS LIKE WE'RE
GOING TO BE STUCK HERE FOR
ANOTHER HOUR FOLKS.
(APPLAUSE)
LA TRAFFIC TOURS.
LOS ANGELES IS KNOWN FOR HAVING
THE WORSE TRAFFIC IN
NORTH AMERICA. IT WAS SO HOT
ON THE BUS. MY BACK WAS
SWEATY. I LOVED IT.
HOW HARD IT WAS TO PARK.
HOURS.
MILES.
BATHROOMS.
GUYS WE'RE STUCK RIGHT NOW.
THIS ISN'T EVEN PART OF THE TOUR.
WE'RE TOTALLY STUCK. (LAUGHS)
HEY THAT'S AL PACINO'S HOUSE.
AND? WHAT'S YOUR POINT?
THE LA TRAFFIC TOUR JAM JOCKIES
ARE CERTIFIED
BUMPER TO BUMPER BRAINIACS.
AS THE TOUR GOES, IN 1954
MARILYN MONROE GOT STUCK
IN TRAFFIC HERE FOR 45 MINUTES.
SO SHE PEE'D IN HER PANTS,
AND SHE WAS LATE FOR
THE 7 DAY ITCH.
(BIG TRUCK HONKS)
TOURS LEAVE AT 9AM AND 5PM.
SO JUMP ON THE HISTORY HIGHWAY.
AND EXPERIENCE, THE RICH TRAFFIC
LEGACY OF LOS ANGELES.
MELROSE EXIT OFF THE 101.
DON'T GET IN FOLKS. DON'T
GET IN.
LISTEN TO THE HORNS.
LISTEN TO THE ANGER.
LISTEN TO THE RAGE.
LOOK AT THAT.
THAT GUYS WALKING FASTER THAN US.
OH WAIT, I THINK
THAT'S COLLIN HANKS.
HEY MOVE YOUR BIG FAT HEAD
COLLIN. YOU'RE GETTING IN THE
WAY OF TRAFFIC.
ALL LA TRAFFIC TOUR TICKETS COME
WITH A COMPLIMENTARY
MELTED GRANOLA BAR, AND HALF
FILLD WATER BOTTLE ROLLING
AROUND THE VAN FLOOR.
IT'S REALLY INTERESTING HOW MUCH
GAS THEY WASTE ON THE TOUR
WAS-- I DON'T KNOW I'M REALLY
GLAD I GOT TO BE APART OF THAT.
I HAD A PANIC ATTACK.
IT WAS GREAT. (LAUGHS)
I TELL YOU WHERE YOU DON'T
WANT TO GO. RUSH HOUR ROAD TOURS.
THEY DON'T KNOW THE FACTS.
THEY DON'T KNOW THE STATS,
AND THEY DON'T KNOW THE
MARILYN MONROE STORY.
SO GRIDLOCK AND ROLL
WITH LA TRAFFIC TOURS.
SORRY GUYS. I THOUGHT THERE
WAS GOING TO BE A LITTLE MORE
TRAFFIC, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT I LIKE YOU.
SEE, YOU KNOW WHAT WE'RE
GOING TO DO
WE'RE GOING TO CAUSE AN ACCIDENT.
(TIRES SCREECH)
(SCREAMING) LA TRAFFIC TOURS.
TRAFFIC NOT GUARANTEED.

Advertisement
Advertisement

From Around the Web