These sexy women know what you want, but they can't give it to you unless they... more »

Full Credits

Written & Directed by Langan Kingsley
Starring: Rebecca Romijn, Blac Chyna, Camila Mendes, Madelaine Petsch, Odette Annable and Nina Dobrev
Producer: Rob Hatch-Miller
Producer: Luke Esselen
Producer: Pantera Sarah
Executive Producer: Kate Lilly
Post Producer: Alex Parks
DP: Matt Sweeney
Editor: Adriana Robles
Production Designer: Chris Sandoval
Production Coordinator: Jack Bradley
Gaffer: Matt Krueger
1st AC: Steve Kan
Key Grip: Alex Gracie
Grips: David Gilmore, Ryan Bender
Hair & Makeup: Jessica Leigh Schwartz, Danielle Rotella
Sound Mixer: Ryan Bertolami, BoTown Sound
Production Assistants: Nabeer Khan, Trevor Osmond

Transcript

- Hi there, the internet.
It's me, a woman.
- You may recognize me from TV.
- Movies.
- Magazines.
- Or late night Google searches.
- You've probably thought about touching my breasts.
- Or wonder what I'd look like as a naked cartoon character.
- It doesn't matter where you first saw me.
- Maybe it was a Maxim spread.
- Your favorite soapy teen drama.
- Maybe it was a music video.
- Or a genuine work of art where I stretched myself
and showed my range.
- You don't remember that last one, do you?
That's okay.
- I'm here to remind you
that while you may be super familiar
with the outside of my body.
- My body also has an inside.
- Including a pretty hefty amount
of reproductive organs.
- And in order to keep
those reproductive organs fully functioning.
- They need some mother fucking healthcare.
- You know the stuff I'm talking about,
the vagina, the breasts.
- Plus all the other things in women's bodies
that can be confusing.
- Like the mammary glands.
- Lymph nodes.
- Uterus.
- Uterine lining.
- Fallopian tubes.
- Ovaries.
- Ovum.
- Birth canal.
- Clitoris.
- Vulva.
- Mons pubis.
- Pudendal cleft.
- Labia majora.
- Labia minora.
- And of course who could forget
the Bartholin's glands.
- Those are the things that secrete vaginal mucus.
They get me really really wet.
- They flood my basement, you know what I'm talkin' about.
- And in order to keep
those reproductive organs fully functioning
we need healthcare.
- Think of pap smears like oxygen facials
for the inside of the body
because the thing is our junk gets fucked up
from time to time, too.
- I know you fantasized about having sex with us.
- Come on, you know you have.
- And I'm guessing that fantasy doesn't end
with a condom mishap and a trip to the drugstore
for Plan B.
- And I'm sure when you're thinking
about my beautiful huge breasts
you're not thinking about the fact
that they need to be regularly screened
for breast cancer.
Also, we will go through menopause.
We'll still be hot, though.
- Did you know that cervical cancer
is underdiagnosed in women of color
leading to higher mortality rates?
- That's something you probably haven't though about
when you've imagined me playing beach volleyball
in a rainstorm while wearing a thong.
- We need IUDs and STI screenings.
- That way if you ever do get a chance
to have sex with us
we can do it in a safe, responsible manner.
- If you don't do this for us
we'll never do anything sexy for you again.
- 'Cause we'll be upset.
- But also because we won't have functioning bodies
which means we can't do all the things we do
that give you erections.
- No more washing cars.
- Jogging braless.
- Or bidding on antique costume broaches on eBay.
- So please, when politicians talk about things
like not wanting to cover contraception.
- Or prenatal care.
- Or mammograms.
- Think about us, sexily begging you
to keep us healthy.
- Because there's nothing sexier than being alive.

Advertisement
Advertisement