Exclusive footage of the birth of Matthew's son
Published July 24, 2008 97k views More Info ยป
Additional Credits
Additional Credits:
Starring Joey Kern
2,144 Funny Votes
884 Die Votes
Published July 24, 2008

[heart monitor beeps]

Alright, alright, alright baby

If the contractions are starting to heat up
and that tells me

It's baby time

But do not you worry I'm going to be right
here between your legs the entire time

Providing comfort and some Brazilian music
on my iPod. Alright?

[Brazilian music plays]
Yeah. Ooh, there we go.

Now you're feeling it
now you're getting into it

Alright, now we're doing a little family movement
Uh-oh, baby's coming.

Everyone we need a sterile working
environment, alright?

Shirts off

We're getting tribal on this shit, know what I'm sayin'

We're going to dance that thing right
out of your copacabana, know what i'm sayin'


[drums sound]

Hey, ya'll get in here
Get your beat on this, c'mon.

Get your hand on this beat

MD we're going to need 2 epidurals stat

1 for my lady, and one for myself so
I can chillax and feel the music

[drums sound]

Hey those epidurals come in Mojito

Hey baby, I invited some brothers over
to check out this miracle

Check it out guys

[sound of drinking and cans opening]

Anybody want to touch it

I do - get in there.

Touch that head, your the first one.
- Oooh

[drums sound]

Hey lance it's me Matthew, yeah, how are you?

[drums sound]

Come here little man
Let me check

Look at that little pecker

I was that small once
If you can believe it

Nobody tells you this, but having a baby is a bloody,
pukey, sweaty, primeval thing

And i mean that as a beautiful thing

[sound of a can opening]

Alright, alright, alright

[Brazilian music plays]


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