Gay Of Thrones S5 EP 5 Recap with Tess Holliday
Jonathan loves three things - Mad Men, bobby pins, and Game of Thrones.
- May 19, 2015
- 220k Views
Starring - Jonathan Van Ness
Featuring - Bryan Safi
Director - Erin Gibson
Producers - Matt Mazany and Ross Buran
Writers - Erin Gibson, Jonny Mais, Mark Rennie, Matt Mazany
Editor - John Ford
Director of Photography - Matt Sweeney
Production Designer - Flower Cole
Gaffer - Daniella Nowitz
Make Up and Hair - Emily Rae
Sound Mixer - Ryan Kaiser
Assistant Editor and Graphics - Kat Palardy
May 19, 2015
Jonathan Van Ness: Oh my god girl, did you watch Game of Thrones this weekend?
Bryan Safi: I did, I finally saw an episode.
> Thank fucking god girl.
> Oh my god, so at the beginning we have Baby Kristen Stewart cleaning
up all the dead people, and then hot St. Francis played a really
violent version of 2 truths and a lie.
> (Jonathan): Oh my god, do you want to play?
> I've once gone down face first into a vagina.
> I should've known when you said
gone down face first into a vagina. I've never heard anyone say it like that.
> Like I tripped and fell into one girl.
> Right, exactly.
> And then Munchers sings to Carlisle the saddest country music song, ever.
> I killed my father. One would you execute me for a crime I didn't commit?
He was fucking the woman I loved.
> (Bryan): But then they run into out of drag Latrice Royale who is threatening
to Lorena Bobbitt him.
> But in classic Muncher style
he talks himself out of a pickle.
> A dwarf lives until we find a cock knife.
> Who is like his designers voice for a cock merchant?
> Dick earrings. Dick necklace. Bracelets. Everything dick.
> And then Earl Grey steps into Blonde Cher's office and he sells out
Orphan Brown part of the jewel when she put out that horrific dance album.
> And Uncle Kevin...
> (Female Voice): Uncle Kevin.
> This whole thing is sounding like a Harry Potter fever dream until they
utter the words Uncle Kevin.
> My Uncle Kevin.
> His name should've been Kevan.
> And then I got all the life when H'ghar and Maggie Smith makes
her season 5 debut honey, and she's got a scathing one star yelp review
for King's Landing.
> He would smell a shit from five miles away.
> You know she's there, because she's going to attend her grandson Loras'
episode of Law and Order, Special Gay Unit.
> You never lay with Renly Bratheon?
> (Bryan): And then that rant old daddy takes his daughter to the
free clinic, and of course he ends up with a physician's assistant.
> (Jonathan): Oh in this case he it's Baby K-Stew, and she totally Jonestowns
that poor little girl by getting her to drink that kool aid.
> You don't want to hurt anymore. Drink.
> Did you see the Jonestown documentary?
> Oh my god with Soledad O'Brien?
> I love how the O'Briens were like, Soledad.
> That's a great name.
> It's a great name.
> She could be on Game of Thrones with a name like that.
> She should be.
So then Rosamund Pike came to give a bath to Orphan Brown thus revealing
Orphan Ging. That's what I'm going to be calling Sansa now.
> (Bryan): And that wedding scene, giving me full Santa's Village during
a power outage.
> (Jonathan): But that valero that Orphan Ginger's wearing, don't you just love her?
> I did. She looks great.
> That was so rude when Evil Elijah Wood ripped it off.
> Yeah, everything about what happened next was pretty rude.
> That was such like a gut wrenching ending.
> Did you see Mad Men last night?
> That was a really sweet ending.
> (singing) I wish that my favorite characters didn't get raped all the time
> (Bryan singing) I guess I'm in pretty bad place so hopefully
this haircut looks nice
> Oh my god, you're giving me some Prince Oberyn flavor with this look right now.
> Are the bobby pins staying in?
> Oh yes honey, absolutely. She's avant-garde.
> I don't understand this look.
> Where are...
> My dragons.