uhdavid

Hey Jon,

HAPPY NEW YEAR! And what a New Year's Eve you had ... hanging out... more »

Hey Jon,

HAPPY NEW YEAR! And what a New Year's Eve you had ... hanging out with Eva Frickin' Longoria co-hosting Las Vegas Live. Heh heh heh -- must have been nice, bro.

I love your ways with the ladies and the celebs. You know, your average shmuck would cream their jeans hangin' with Eva or P. Diddy, but I'm sure you were just like, "Hey Eva, let's chill." Smooth moves, bro -- you've got to include a chapter on that in your book.

Just one question - why does it look like you have shit smeared on your forehead in your Funny or Die photo? Major turn off for the ladies, homie.

Well, I got to get back to shooting off guns, trashing my apartment, and totally forgetting about my eight kids. We got a lot in common, you and me, kind of like that Eminem song. You're my hero, man. Peace out!

Hey Jon,

Sorry about that court verdict -- we'll miss you, buddy. But in... more »

Hey Jon,

Sorry about that court verdict -- we'll miss you, buddy. But in good news, you made the current issue of Maxim -- the one with Olivia Munn on the cover (January 2010) -- TWICE!! Smooth move, bro. Check it out ... both mentions are on page 53. At your local newsstand. Once you see them, you'll want to buy a copy to show your friends (and the kids when they are older - not sure they should be reading Maxim just yet.)

;-)

P.S. I signed up to Funny or Die just to leave you this message. Big, big fan.