When was the last time you went on a bike ride? It's fun, healthy and enviromentally friendly! Step away from the computer screen and get some fresh air.
Read a Book Outside
You don't have to get physical to get outside. Take that book you've been meaning to read under a tree and transport yourself to another world through the amazing power of text. You never know what adventure awaits you on the next page!
Masturbate Using Your Imagination
Oh no! Your favorite porn site is down but it's 2pm and you still need to jerk off. Why don't you close your eyes and go to your happy place? And by happy place, I mean that person in your life who would definitely stop talking to you if they knew you pictured them naked every time your wireless goes out.
Write a Friend a Letter
Writing a letter is a great way to let someone in your life know they're important and you're thinking about them. Friends really seem to appreciate it! Unless, of course, this is the friend you think about when you masturbate. They really DO NOT seem to appreciate letters, emails or texts regarding the matter. Trust me.
Read a Book Without a Shirt On
You don't have to go outside to breathe some life into the experience of reading a book. Just remove your shirt and feel the wind of literature wash over your chest. It might feel so good that you never wear a shirt ever again!
You said 2012 would be all about new things. Why not try smoking crack? People seem to love it. If you've smoked crack before, you probably ALREADY love it but have been staying away because you need to check Wikipedia and answer emails. Guess what? No Wikipedia today and those emails can wait! Smoke some crack and call your Senator to talk about SOPA/your favorite techno record.
Masturbate Using Your Imagination Again
Just because the Internet went away doesn't mean you need to curb your embarassing appetite to bring yourself to orgasm. Go for round two, maybe this time think about your neighbor. Make it a fun challenge! Not the hot neighbor, the really ugly one. Try to finish before they notice you looking in their window. Maybe you'll get some fresh air when you run from the cops! Make your escape on a bicycle for maximum SOPA blackout day combo points.