Remember in the 90's when it was cool to be dumb? Especially if your name was Joey. Here are some of my favorite dumb Joey's of the 90's.

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December 02, 2011

Joey Tribbiani

"How yoo dooin?"  Remember how much this Joey loved sandwiches, and how he could never conceal his boner for Rachel?  Even I clapped and "whooed" every time he entered with that Valium-esque look on his face.  I like how the writers kept up the running gag that he believed in Santa until he was forty.  Power on, my Italian mongoloid friend.  

Joey Lawrence

Woah!  I never knew what statement Joey Lawrence was trying to make about our society, but I  always knew it was important.  On Brotherly Love he was the minimum wage sex addict with a heart of gold, on Blossom he was the half man, half child, half virgin archetype that we wished we could relate to, and he currently stars as That Bald Orange Host on various variety shows.  Looks like Lawrence found the loophole in type-casting.

Joey Buttafuoco

Bada Bing Bada Court Justice!  Joey Buttafuoco made me proud to be an American.  Knowing that in the land of the free my mistress can shoot my wife in the face while eeeevverrryythhiinnggg works out fine reminds me how lucky I am to be a white male.  

Joey Rogan

You sat through commercials to tolerate Joey Rogan in News Radio, now you can tolerate him for free on his podcast, The Joey Rogan Experience.  I know what you're thinking, he's not really a dumb Joey, he knows his shit when it comes to conspiracy theories.  Yet, ironically, the biggest conspiracy theory of all is how he sells out for his stand up comedy shows.  What a roundhouse kick to the consciousness!

Joey Gladstone

Cut.  It.  Out!  Did Joey Gladstone move in with the Tanners because he wasn't mature enough to take care of himself on his own?  DJ must have had a real handful babysitting Michelle, Stephanie, AND uncle Joey all at the same time.  At least he did an awesome Popeye impression, although I'm not sure what suppressed memories he was trying to express with the beaver puppet who loved "wood?".

Joey Fatone

Remember how awesome it was that the fat one from Nsync actually had the name, "Fatone"?  If you watch the old music videos you can see him in the background keeling over with his hands on his knees, only to lift his head and let out a voice-overed chorus to muffle his wheezing grunts.