The world would be a much better place if these people did us all a big favor and just died

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March 09, 2011

Saggy Swole Dude

I get it you're old, you're buff and you could care less that you have saggy balls. But, I don't need you're advice old-timer. Actually I have some advice for you: Jack Lelanne just died, and you should too.

Large Marge

Do you wanna know why you're fat? Because you think walking is an aerobic exercise. He could walk from here to Timbuktu and back, and you'd still be fat. Want to lose weight? Here's a tip: eat less.P.S. Spandex is a right not a privilege

Skinny Bones Jones

I'm sorry to be the one who has to break it to you but "not fat" does not equal muscular! Please stop checking out your guns in the mirror cuz you're making a fool out of yourself, and distracting me. You never see Susan Struthers standing next to a couple of starving Somalian kids having a pose off do you? So do us all a favor and get yourself some steroids.

Steroid Loyd

Doesn't it seem like this guy is always walking around pissed off because other people have the audacity to work out at HIS gym? Could you imagine anybody else doing this? Imagine a librarian just being a huge dick to everyone that can't read as well. Don't even get me started on the grunts these guys make. It sounds like they are literally taking a huge shit and orgasming instantaneously.

Spin Nazi

If I have to hear you singing along to one more freaking song I just might bite your face off. There is a fine line between annoying as fuck and inspiring. Find it.

Chester The Sauna Molester

Um yeah, FYI you're at a gym not a Greek bathhouse. If I'm in the sauna sweatin out a hangover the last thing I need is your creepy ass making small talk.

Wannabe MMA Douche

You have cauliflower ear. You're little brother is your entourage. You spend all your money on tattoos (and Tapout gear). You live at home and your idea of upward mobility is being promoted to head bouncer.You're not a fighter. You're a douche.

The Preppy Lil Bitch

Here's a news flash: it's the gym, not the set of a modeling shoot. Leave the jeans and the converse at home, and start working out something other than your glamor muscles. Until then, we're just going to assume you're gay.

Sweaty McSweaterson

I don't know what's worse: using the bench after this guy, or getting stuck sleeping in the wet spot after sex? Oh yeah PS: If you know you are gonna sweat like a pig, then it might be a good idea to invest in some non-gray gym clothes. You're just gonna have to trust me on this one bud.

Gym Queer

I get it. I get it. You're gay. But does that really justify wearing a fish net tank to the gym? Does anything ever justify wearing a fish net ever? I think the only appropriate use of fish net is on a hooker or when actually fishing.

(Unless Your The Boz)

The End.