Tim Burton's Rejected Ideas for a Macy's Thanksgiving Parade Float

For the first time ever, Macy's has invited Tim Burton to contribute a piece to their Thanksgiving Day Parade. But due to the often macabre nature of his work, there were understandably many pitches that were not *quite* family-friendly enough to include in the festivities. These are those ideas and how Macy's probably broke the news to Tim why they don't work.
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Boy With Nails In His Eyes Balloon
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"Well, Tim, aside from this being terrifying to small children, unfortunately it's just too similar to our Charlie Brown balloon. Except, you know, with the nails in the eyes thing."
Crowd-diving Beetlejuice Sandworm Balloons
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"Though the added effect of being able to dive these balloons like kites into the crowd is a cool stunt, Tim, ultimately this may pose a safety hazard to have heavy, gas-filled objects dive-bomb thousands of people."
Electrified Frankenweenie Balloon
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"Tim, we get you want to promote your upcoming film, but it's a dead dog on fire. Not to mention the obvious hazard of having flames coming off a helium balloon. Too Hindenberg." 
Float Johnny Depp as Edward Scissorhands with Party Balloons
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"Ok. Well. Tim, can you even GET Johnny Depp to do this? We're just a little worried about his knife-hands cutting the balloon strings and him falling to his death over the Rockettes."
Oogie Boogie Does a Nightmare Dance
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"Tim. Jesus, no. C'mon, man. You know what thousands of screaming babies sounds like? Wait, yes, you probably do."
Replace Santa with Jack Skellington Santa
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"Really, Tim? REALLY? You want us to replace our famous, jolly Santa that kids love - the crowning moment of the parade - with your big-faced, horrifying skeleton man? Tim, why are you such an asshole?"
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  • Why would you replace the Jack Skellington that we all know and love with a fat guy in a red suit?
  • The Hindenberg blew up because it was filled with hydrogen, not helium. Helium is a noble gas. Those are the elements least likely to chemically react, because of their atomic structure.
  • Now THESE floats would actually make a parade interesting enough to go watch!!! LOL!
  • wa? u people are crazy! it should have a jack or an oogie or beetle juice or edward. man i would love the parade after that
  • I think if they made the parade like this, I would actually watch it!
  • This is hilarious!
  • Love it.
  • PHOTSHOP.PHOTOSHOP.PHOTOSHOP.PHOTOSHOP.
  • i ;ove it
  • i love it
  • very good
  • lmao
  • THESE ARE FREAKING AWESOME!!... Would definitely love to see a parade like that!!.... However, the Tim Burton aesthetic is not for everyone, so guess they'll be sticking with the Snoopy and Pokemon... :s
  • WOW! This would have been a great opportunity for Tim Burton to show off his work.... BUT Macy's corporation ran by douchebags reject his ideas and don't realize how many people would love to see this. Wth the whole replacing Santa with Jack is awesome.... or even having Tim Burton's Santa standing next to Santa Jack would be awesome.
  • I am a HUGE fan of Tim Burton and I think the floats are AWSOME!!!
  • Love the note under #5--so appropriate!
  • I have an autistic son who takes some things (quite literally)this is a picture,I hope he never comes across. I for one am thankful it was rejected.I love Tim Burtons work.But perhaps he could try to think of "contributing to the theme"next year.Rather than simply trying to just shock & awe.
  • A friendly suggestion ;} call it a challenge if you will.Make an Oddball family float,all butterball turkeys lol idk but ANYTHING other than a maimed child :/ Please Mr.Burton,Please Thank You .That is all
  • I know you're just following the trend, but can we please stop saying "family-friendly" when we mean child-friendly? My parents and I are a family. My fiance and I are a family. My whole family will probably get together for Christmas and not one of us will be under 30. Tim Burton is therefore completely family-friendly.
  • This is so true, its hardly even funny. lol Even though I myself am a HUGE fan of Burton and his ideas. The Boy With Nails In His Eyes, though the character is frightening to look at for those who don't understand, has a really emotional story, in a sense. The child has this unfortunate accident and struggles to live with it every day.
 
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