Tim Burton's Rejected Ideas for a Macy's Thanksgiving Parade Float

For the first time ever, Macy's has invited Tim Burton to contribute a piece to their Thanksgiving Day Parade. But due to the often macabre nature of his work, there were understandably many pitches that were not *quite* family-friendly enough to include in the festivities. These are those ideas and how Macy's probably broke the news to Tim why they don't work.
Social ON
Social OFF

View all on one page
1 / 6

Boy With Nails In His Eyes Balloon
21ddb72c793010f4749288d970dcc6a0_width_600x
"Well, Tim, aside from this being terrifying to small children, unfortunately it's just too similar to our Charlie Brown balloon. Except, you know, with the nails in the eyes thing."
Crowd-diving Beetlejuice Sandworm Balloons
B0a6d448f131bd887ecdd48c40d317fa_width_600x
"Though the added effect of being able to dive these balloons like kites into the crowd is a cool stunt, Tim, ultimately this may pose a safety hazard to have heavy, gas-filled objects dive-bomb thousands of people."
Electrified Frankenweenie Balloon
1c969c48865a6c16ae119166c9c9969c_width_600x
"Tim, we get you want to promote your upcoming film, but it's a dead dog on fire. Not to mention the obvious hazard of having flames coming off a helium balloon. Too Hindenberg." 
Float Johnny Depp as Edward Scissorhands with Party Balloons
B980b305ec4e41004c49cc6f4e3432f7_width_600x
"Ok. Well. Tim, can you even GET Johnny Depp to do this? We're just a little worried about his knife-hands cutting the balloon strings and him falling to his death over the Rockettes."
Oogie Boogie Does a Nightmare Dance
F6ceab9a38047f58510acf01cc53a1df_width_600x
"Tim. Jesus, no. C'mon, man. You know what thousands of screaming babies sounds like? Wait, yes, you probably do."
Replace Santa with Jack Skellington Santa
2ba91304a952cfbac39b955113bde492_width_600x
"Really, Tim? REALLY? You want us to replace our famous, jolly Santa that kids love - the crowning moment of the parade - with your big-faced, horrifying skeleton man? Tim, why are you such an asshole?"
Check out these other funny slideshows!
Credits Details
allyhord
Uploader

More by Ally Hord

Hungover with Bridesmaids from Maya Rudolph, Kristen Wiig, Rose Byrne, Wendi McLendon Covey, Judd Apatow, Ellie Kemper, Ally Hord, Funny Or Die, Brian Lane, and Bridesmaids
Added
Hungover with Bridesmaids
Toddlers & Tiaras with Ashley Tisdale from Ashley Tisdale, Leah Remini, Funny Or Die, Ally Hord, Drew Droege, rachelgoldenberg, kevinstewart, Christin Trogan, Kathryn Burns, Liam White, Aubrey Binzer, BoTown Sound, PatB, Bob Turton, Kate Spurgeon, TLopezCepero, and heatherayers
Added
Toddlers & Tiaras with Ashley Tisdale
It's F*ckin' Late with Dave Coulier from Dave Coulier, Andrea Barber, Melissa Stephens, Ally Hord, Johnny Pemberton, Cat Solen, manasewitsch, Andy Maxwell, Brian Lane, and Funny Or Die
Added
It's F*ckin' Late with Dave Coulier
It's F*ckin' Late with Larisa Oleynik from Larisa Oleynik, Nick Thune, Melissa Stephens, Ally Hord, Cat Solen, Funny Or Die, manasewitsch, Andy Maxwell, and Brian Lane
Added
It's F*ckin' Late with Larisa Oleynik
Inappropriate Garfield Doctor Reminders from Ally Hord
Added
Inappropriate Garfield Doctor Reminders
iSteve - Now on DVD and Hulu Plus! from Justin Long, Jorge Garcia, James_Urbaniak, Michaela Watkins, Steve Tom, John Ross Bowie, Paul Rust, Ryan Perez, Brian Lane, Juzo Yoshida, Brian Huskey, Art Evans, jill_donnelly, Anthony Gioe, Ally Hord, iSteve, Funny Or Die, Charles Ingram, NickCorirossi, Joe Farrell, and Katy Walker
Added
iSteve - Now on DVD and Hulu Plus!
Lassie Reports a Crime from Erin Gibson, Drew Tarver, Ally Hord, Funny Or Die, Chris Poole, Casey Donahue, Jessica Leigh Schwartz, BoTown Sound, and Andrew Grissom
Added
Lassie Reports a Crime
Richard Marx's Soundtrack for Self-Pleasure from Richard Marx, Ian Pfaff, Avin Das, Aaron Ulrich, Ally Hord, Funny Or Die, Jamie Kaler, Pam Murphy, BoTown Sound, and FODfm
Added
Richard Marx's Soundtrack for Self-Pleasure
 
  • Content-footer