Halloween aka "Excuse to Dress like a Hooker" is just around the corner and we've broken down the type of girls who wear them.

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October 26, 2011

5. Sexy Doctor

Sexy Doctor - You know these girls. They try to justify this slutty choice by claiming they were "this close" to becoming a doctor.  When in reality they banged a guy who knew a guy who almost studied medicine. Nice try, go have another tequila shot.

4. Sexy Cowgirl

Sexy Cowgirl - This type of girl really doesn't need an excuse to wear a cowboy hat because you can usually find her wearing one any day of the year - her birthday, her friend's birthday, and even little baby Jesus' birthday. By the end of a typical night out for her she'll usually be doing the Reverse Cowgirl. Tell your trusty steed to keep moving.

3. Sexy Schoolgirl

3. Sexy Schoolgirl - 35% of the time they have a penis. Stay away.

2. Sexy Cop

Sexy Cop - Oh the sexy cop. She carries a baton and handcuffs. Anyway you look at it it's a win win.  If you think she's interested tell her you wouldn't mind having a little domestic disturbance in the back of your dad's Ford Focus. Well maybe don't mention the part about the Ford Focus.

1. Sexy Maid

Sexy Maid - She is definitely trying to appeal to your sense of traditional man-woman roles. You make a mess and she'll clean it up. Or should I say "clean it up". Not sure exactly what that means but most likely it involves her boobs somehow.  You've got a good shot if you're dressed as Arnold Schwarzenegger but a guaranteed loss if you dress up as former IMF president Dominique Strauss-Kahn.