Search Results for Christmas

A homemade video of my brand spankin-new yuletide classic "Fuck Christmas"! For any of you people who can't stand christmas songs, who get stuck w/ their crazy family during the holidays, wh... more >

A homemade video of my brand spankin-new yuletide classic "Fuck Christmas"! For any of you people who can't stand christmas songs, who get stuck w/ their crazy family during the holidays, who miss happier times when all you had to worry about was whether you were going to dress up as Sarah Palin, who walk in to a store and want to scream because they are playing "Let It Snow" and it's not even NOVEMBER.. this one's for you, bitches! xoxoxo Matthew “Fuck Xmas (I Wish It Was Halloween)” Written and performed by Matthew McPeck © 2008 Verse 1: It’s Christmas time The snowflakes are falling And the arguments and accusations are already starting My brothers are stoned, my sisters are hating and mom wants me to find a nice girl and start pro-creating Granny’s brain is mush, she mumbles concurring and if Daddy hadn’t left us by now I’m sure he’d be slurring Verse 2: It’s Christmas time The stockings are hanging And I’d sure as hell prefer it me on that mantle asphyxiating The fire is warm, but the room is so cold More egg nog with my brandy, please Merry Christmas to all! Chorus 1: And if I had one wish this Christmas, I wouldn’t even hesitate I’d beg baby Jesus and Santa to turn the clock back 55 days With my costumes packed away Next Autumn seems so far a wait! Oh how I wish I was with my baby on Halloween! Verse 3: Last year you were Slash, and I was Axl They may hate in real life but to me you are king of the castle! Chorus 2: With our friends dressed as Sarah Palin and Amy Winehouse We’d party through the night and end up at my house… uh huh! I’m a zombie for your love, oh won’t you suck my…blood??? Oh how I miss my baby and Halloween! Bridge: ‘Cause on Halloween we can all be free just to be the freaks we were born to be Verse 4: Now the yule log is playin’ on the telly Everyone is passed out and I’m almost through with this Hell-y Everybody!!! Chorus 1: And if I had one wish this Christmas, I wouldn’t even hesitate I’d beg baby Jesus and Santa to turn the clock back 55 days With my costumes packed away Next Autumn seems so far a wait! Oh how I wish I was with my baby on Halloween! You Hallmark fascists expect me sober When you start playing your f**king songs in October! Hark the heralded devils sing Halloween! So to you holiday-loving sons of bitches Screw you all! And hey! F**k Christmas! All I need is my baby, my baby and Halloween! Fuck Christmas! Santa turn back the clock to Halloween Fuck Christmas! Santa turn back the clock to Halloween Fuck Christmas! Santa turn back the clock to Halloween Fuck Christmas! Please Santa turn back the clock to Halloween… < less

See how me and my friends saved christmas. A note to Cynical Bastards of the World: Get Ready for a change of mind. I'll be on Colbert soon. Just give me your ear for one night. Read my blog... more >

See how me and my friends saved christmas. A note to Cynical Bastards of the World: Get Ready for a change of mind. I'll be on Colbert soon. Just give me your ear for one night. Read my blog if you don't believe me. It is my soul. I respected the internet (it almost killed me) for about 2 weeks. We accidently re-invented the joke. < less

Walter, Peanut and Achmed comment on Bubba J's music video "Road Kill Christmas", from "Jeff Dunham's Very Special Christmas Special", available on DVD and CD!!

Walter, Peanut and Achmed comment on Bubba J's music video "Road Kill Christmas", from "Jeff Dunham's Very Special Christmas Special", available on DVD and CD!! < less

Carol and Diane are back and better than ever in this highlight reel showcasing some of the best moments from their 2008 Christmas Crafts special. Come on LADIES! Strap on some yoga pants an... more >

Carol and Diane are back and better than ever in this highlight reel showcasing some of the best moments from their 2008 Christmas Crafts special. Come on LADIES! Strap on some yoga pants and hold on tight! This will knock your socks off! < less

Lizzy the Lezzy Stand up comedy videos - Funny Christmas Special! Merry Muff Munch everyone! a special christmas message from Lizzy to send to your friends this year... please pass it on! ... more >

Lizzy the Lezzy Stand up comedy videos - Funny Christmas Special! Merry Muff Munch everyone! a special christmas message from Lizzy to send to your friends this year... please pass it on! Official Site: http://www.lizzythelezzy.com Lizzy's Myspace: http://www.myspace.com/ruthselwyn < less