Olly tackles a weighty issue indeed...
For the sake of mankind I'd like to set the record straight:
Mika's full of shi... more >
Olly tackles a weighty issue indeed...
For the sake of mankind I'd like to set the record straight:
Mika's full of shit for telling girls to put on weight.
And I've got a news flash for you:
Mika's not into girls,
He's into me and you!
With 'restaurants' like Macdonalds and KFC
Obesity's a problem in today's society
So before you build a belly like Beth Ditto
Remember your chances of cancer, heart disease and diabetes will grow.
Big girls are not as beautiful
But skinny girls are starting to get rare
Junk food and sedentary life-styles
Means fat bottomed people are everywhere.
Skinny girls don't have to work hard to get blokes
So they often get complacent and are crap at telling jokes.
What's more, a perfect body will go to her head
And she'll be less likely to go down in bed.
You can blame it on posh spice for being far too thin
Because not all girls can look like that and most just give in.
But if we're passing the buck we really should
Blame men because we'd all fuck her if we could.
Big girls are not as beautiful
But skinny girls are spoilt and don't like sex
Fat bottomed girls are always more grateful
And often have less of a complex.
Curves can make a lady much better in the sack
But folds just advertise an imminent heart attack
People come in all shapes and sizes I can see
But lets not pretend we're all created equally.
I am a baldy, you may be fat.
Darwin is a fucker and that is that.
But there are a lot of skinny girls in the media
While the rest of the country is just getting greedier.
It's a game they play with size-zero freeks
That stifles our aspirations and keeps us weak.
Big girls are not as beautiful
But skinny girls are grumpy and need food
And if there was a new ice age
The skinny folk would freeze and fat would be good....
A response to Big Girls You Are Beautiful By Mika < less
There is a fundraising festival for the people whose lively hoods were damaged by the Camden fire in Lock 17 on 28th Feb... more >
There is a fundraising festival for the people whose lively hoods were damaged by the Camden fire in Lock 17 on 28th Feb 2008. Please come and give generously. I will be playing at some point after 11pm
visit
http://www.myspace.com/antzinthejam
for more details
http://www.myspace.com/ollytheoctopus
http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid...
Camden's burning!
Fetch the engines!
But it's too late for The Halwey Arms.
When shove came from push
Where were the cast of The Mighty Bush?
Couldn't T4's Alexa Chung
Between the pub and the smoke
And her Arctic Monkeys bloke
Her young body have flung?
If Pete Docherty
Had been within
Perhaps he could have been the heroine.
And if Bob Geldoff's daughters
Had been drinking water
They could have raised the alarm
So it would come to no harm.
Camden's burning!
Fetch the engines!
But it's too late for The Halwey Arms.
It was Amy's wine house.
Could her vagabond ways
Have had something to do with the blaze?
No one can be certain
That her crack pipe lit a curtain
Unless she's paid off someone's gaze...
Captain Black
Could not push the flames back
And Mobile Act Unsigned
Blunted Gilkicker's mind:
He couldn't get to the extinguishers in time
And Noel Fielding's impractical clothes
Stopped him getting to the hose.
Camden's burning!
Fetch the engines!
But it's too late for The Halwey Arms.
How will poor old Kate Moss
Cope with the loss?
And where will she go now
With the rock aristocrats
And aspirationals in trilby hats?
You've got to wonder how
Quins down the road
Is going to cope with the load
Because The Lock Tavern and Proud Galleries
Are already full of wannabes.
Camden's burning!
Fetch the engines!
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