Wilson (Home Improvement)
âDonât you look at my face! Donât you dare look at my face!â Thatâs probably the last thing you hear before the guy in the funny hat kills you with a quality Binford power saw. Good fences make good neighbors, but they also might be hiding a sociopath across the way. The face thing is creepy enough, but Wilsonâs omniscience is a serial killer red flag. Hey, Tim. Didnât you ever wonder how he always knew just what to say? Almost like heâs been watching you through binocularsâ¦waiting for just the right moment to strike? I always figured the last episode of âHome Improvementâ would be a two-parter where Wilson kills the whole family then pins it on Al. I think it just turned out to be a five-episode arch about how nobody has been watching the show for 3 years.
Milhouse Van Houten (The Simpsons)
Milhouse had a tough time growing up on Evergreen Terrace. His parents split up at an early age and the girl down the street wouldnât pay him any attention. Itâs these kinds of rocky childhood memories that lay the foundation for a mass murderer down the line. Milhouse seems lonely, so his downfall would likely be that he was into doing weird stuff to the corpses. Blue pubes are the number one way cartoon cops catch sex offenders. Just ask the convicted flasher from âDoug.â
Sam (Clarissa Explains it All)
There are two kinds of dudes who prop ladders up against your house and climb in through the window. One of them is there to rob you, and the other one is there to rape and kill you. He might stick around to steal a few things, but thatâs not where his heartâs at. Either way, Sam Ladderman (editorâs note: his name on the show was certainly not Ladderman, but in retrospect maybe it shouldâve been) would not be someone Iâd feel comfortable sneaking in to my daughterâs room. Best case scenario: he makes off with my VHS player and Fergusonâs Super Nintendo. Worst case scenario: Clarissa explains it all to the sketch artist.