Join and quit Twitter several times within the first hour.
Use Apple Maps to get to his jeweler; wind up trying to beat up Siri in an Arby’s parking lot.
Instagram pictures of each of his abs individually.
Use GarageBand to record and Auto-Tune his grocery list.
Blow rails off of one those phony mirror apps.
Angrily Tweet about Zynga when Words With Friends won’t let him play his own name. Quit twitter.
Instagram photo of himself and Rihanna naked on a unicycle.
Throw new iPhone into a wall in a blind rage.
Get neck tattoo of his shattered iPhone.
Instagram photo of his sweet new neck tat. Join Twitter.