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I found these images on my phone, but I told her I would doctor the pictures so no one would know it was her. Since I am an asshole, I just told you who the pictures were of. But please don't tell her I leaked these photos.
Published January 05, 2013 More Info »
15 Funny Votes
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Published January 05, 2013

Sexy Mii-Ra 001

Sexy Puppy 001

Here is the first shot.  Now you may be thinking that this picture isn't all that scandilous, and well, you're right.  But I just wanted you to see that she's not always revealing herself to everyone who walks in the room.  Shes an amazing puppy, who we rescued from a shelter about a year and a half ago.  But maybe the last person she lived with allowed this kind of gratuitous behavior.  I for one told her she needs to stop and seek help for her addiction to voyeurism,  but everytime I tell her this, she incoherently screams "W**F!", "A*F!" and even "B**K!" (I censored these profanities due to those who may be offended, even though you're looking at a list that is NSFW, wimps).  She really needs help, but the only time she'll ever respond to any type of positivity in her life, is when she is offered a treat, or when she has to poop.  

Drunken Mii-Ra 002

Drunk Mii-Ra 002

This image is of Mii-Ra on New Years Eve.  She decided to get WASTED on Beef Vodka before the countdown even started.  My entire family told her she had enough, which she screamed at us with a loud piercing shriek: "ARRROOOORORORORRRROOOOO RRR!" and then proceeded to stumble into my room and passout on my bed.  I took this minutes later to show her the proof of her drunkenness.  I told her to lay off the beef,  but Im all out of options now!

Drunken Mii-Ra 003

Ravaging Mii-Ra 003

Here is another image of her after she got way too tipsy on chicken 151.  It was a nightmare!  After vomiting all over our brand new rug (Thank God I held Her up!  She almost ruined her pretty sweater, Walmart Vintage BRAH), she once again stumbled into my room and passed out on my couch.  What a drunken mess! 

Sexy Mii-Ra 004

gddgpSexy Mii-Ra 004

Okay... I know this looks bad,  and yes, it's pretty bad.  After one night where she got completely drunk off of Gin and Biscuits, she decided to try to tantalize me with about 5 of her 11 nipples.  She was trying to give me a peak at her goods, and I was like "Mii-Ra, you need to calm down,  I told you, I love you like a puppy, but this whole sexy act has gotta stop!  I told you, Im just not into that!  I mean how hard is that to understand?"  She then quickly responded by shouting "Ruff". 

I figured that meant that she had an extremely hard time coping with that,  but somehow it still doesn't stop her from slipping me a couple of her nips.  What a strange, strange puppy.

Sexy Mii-Ra 005

Sexy Mii-Ra 005

...So this is the worst of the bunch.  So one day I came back with my girlfriend to my house, and I wanted to watch a movie (One of the 1000 laserdiscs in the background of this image) .  When I was pulling into the driveway, I saw Mii-Ra peering out of my living room window and she noticed I had a girl with me.  As I was walking up the driveway, I saw her quickly run away, and I figured she was just going to the door to greet us like a normal dog.  Right?

WRONG.  As I opened the door, she was no where to be seen.  So I called for her and didn't hear anything.  I called her name again and I heard faintly from the back room "Raorrrrwowwww!" in like a calm and gentle while.  As I went back to the room and turned the light on I discovered her in this position, with her tongue out. 

My girlfriend was pissed, thinking I was cheating on her, and I was astonished by the depths that Mii-Ra would sink to for my attention.  Now at this moment I looked at my girlfriend and she was crying in the other room, and Mii-Ra smiling with her tongue hanging out, I quickly snapped this picture, and I sternly said: "Mii-Ra, why do you have to be such a bitch?  Seriously!". 

My girlfriend broke up with me that night.

I've been lonely ever since....

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